To think marrying a rich person does not mean you've 'done well for yourself'?

[BringOnTheBotox]

A woman I know has three daughters, all in their early twenties.

The middle daughter got married extremely young to a man twenty years older than her, who is wealthy.

The mum is constantly talking about how her daughter has 'done well for herself' in life.

I disagree that she has done well for herself; she hasn't got any qualifications above GCSE level, she had no career (worked part time in fashion retail before meeting her husband), and makes no money of her own.

AIBU to think she hasn't done well for herself if all she has done is marry someone rich?

Nice to see the tired old MN stereotype of "All rich men are abusive, controlling cheats" being trotted out yet again.

Wish I'd married someone rich. My husband is poor, and an arsehole!

You sound jealous as hell.

Yabu

Pre nups don’t work in Uk, if that’s where you are.

So she most likely has done well for herself and will be wealthy even if they do divorce.

So the daughter married an older man (but not "old" - 40's is not old at all), she is beautiful (although works hard and gets treatments to maintain it), lives in a nice house, drives a nice car, goes on nice holidays and doesn't have to work? Honestly, sounds like a good life to me.

My sister in law, married a wealthy man, he retired before he was 40.

He's shagged everything that's moved and she's put up with it. I used to feel quite sorry for her but now just think she's pathetic, there's been dozens of women, some of them have even been his daughters friends.

It's not what I'd want for my daughters but she has financial security and could afford to educate herself, if she wishes to.

My mother (72) told me the other day that it didn't matter if my daughter (12) wasn't as bright as my son, as she "could marry well"
Even though she knows damn well I am the main breadwinner in my marriage.

People still think like this.

I rather. Array a rich arse than a poor arse but I'd much rather have less money and enjoy the life I have without the pressure she has.

Marry not array

Totally agree OP. Off you go and tell her she is a failure.!!!!

I find it a weird attitude. My sister is married to someone who has made a lot of money and I say that he has done well for himself, not her, because it is his career that has afforded them such an affluent lifestyle. She wouldn’t have married someone without prospects, but that is because she finds ambition and drive attractive, not because she is a gold digger.,

Well objectively speaking, anything should be acknowledged as an achievement if many people attempt it and only a few succeed. Marrying rich is one of those. As unpopular of an opinion this is, it's NOT EASY to just go out there and marry a rich man. Whatever people think of women whose sole ambition is to bag a wealthy partner, you have to give them credit that it's not something every woman can do but simply choose not to.

If the definition of "rich" is finding a husband in the top 1% then it means only 1% of women are paired up with these men. Yes, some of these rich men are cheating bastards and some are creepers who want the plastic arm candy type of women. However many are just normal men who happen to be good in their careers and want to share their money with their wife and family.

There's a huge difference between hanging around hotel bars hoping to meet rich old men, and dating a successful man who eventually becomes your husband. I think most women would be fully open to the latter option, except it's not as easy as it sounds. So as depressingly un-feminist the AIBU is, there is a lot of truth in seeing it as success.

This attitude harks back to when a woman wasn't meant to amount to much except getting married. So to marry someone with a few bob was seen as an achievement. Thankfully, things have moved on.

Apparently getting one of the most lucrative degrees and subsequent jobs was just a way to bag the right sort of man, for nearly all of them.

Surely there are easier ways to bag a rich man than putting in seven years in gruelling higher ed, then another decade working 80+ hour weeks? To get into these law programs you have to be extremely intelligent, I'm sure these women could have figured out a simpler way to marry rich if that was their goal!

I think you are jealous