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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So many babies in the family now. Just boring.

183 replies

RoarerBoringAlice · 10/02/2020 14:32

I know I'm being unreasonable.

But it's how I feel.

I am the eldest of 6 siblings.

My youngest is a young adult.

Ive done the baby bit. My brooding is over and done with.

I had my children earlier than my other siblings, they all started late, I started early.

So they are all in full bloom of their young families.

Being 5 of them all having 3 + kids each it's just seems like an ENDLESS parade of new babies.

All of whom I love of course, its not the babies that bore me but this trend that was not about when I had my kids is ever present, gender reveal parties, baby showers, naming ceremonies...

Arghhh. I have to just smile and sit through the same shit over and over. It's either a boy or a girl. It's not that exciting.

I never felt the need to have this constant attention when I was pregnant.

People visited the baby when it was born.

If you were lucky you got a baby grow and a balloon.

Now it's arranging meals out with decorated tables and games and confetti cannons and it just does my bloody head in.

Of course I would never say this to anyone in real life.

But christ. It's fucking trying to get through over and over again.

OP posts:
Foreverros123 · 10/02/2020 16:17

I have 7 nieces and nephews. As excited for the first one as I was for the last. Now I have my own and everyone is excited.

IrmaFayLear · 10/02/2020 16:18

The thing is I think the minute one has passed a stage oneself it's boring. So I can't really summon up much enthusiasm when people talk about pregnancy or weaning or walking or pre-schools or school catchment areas or SATS or even GCSEs. Now, A Levels on the other hand... fascinating !!

Chocpear · 10/02/2020 16:18

They are sentient potatoes. I prefer puppies

It’s only through mumsnet that I have learnt that a considerable amount of people prefer other baby animals than human baby animals. It’s interesting as I am someone who melts when I see a baby - I love them - whilst I think puppies and kittens are cute but not as cute as human babies.

Crazybunnylady123 · 10/02/2020 16:20

Pregnant with my second, won’t be having any gender reveal parties and certainly no baby shower. I don’t have money to waste on parties, I have a new baby on the way who will need “stuff” and I don’t want my family to feel they have to spend a fortune. Just will be happy to if completed our family.
Getting married next year, nice little registry office and a night away will do me. As long as we have a cake of course!

seadog1977 · 10/02/2020 16:26

I'm one of 7 . I'm the eldest and have two kids . My youngest siblings havnt had any yet, and quite rightly living a carefree lifestyle . I can't wait for them to have kids , and all that goes with that the sleepless night etc , not being able to go places and not being invited to places because you have kids .

Also I'm going to payback ALLLLL the times that they have offered to babysit for me which is precisely ZERO . Then reminding them of that .

QuixoticQuokka · 10/02/2020 16:27

I don't mind a bit of fuss over a first pregnancy. However, if it's a second child (or, perish the thought, a Third, despite the population crisis) then I will treat the child the same as their sibling once they're here, but I'm not participating in the announcement of the sex, baby shower, or any other over the top rubbish that the child is not even aware of.

NemophilistRebel · 10/02/2020 16:31

im in the age group where all my peers are having babies now and I find all the gender reveals, and showers and parties are rediculous

zasknbg · 10/02/2020 16:31

At its inception, social media was for narcissists. Now that almost everyone is on it, they are becoming infected with narcissism and oneupmanship. It’s fucked up.

ItWillBeBetterinAugust · 10/02/2020 16:35

I don't think it's having passed the life phase, it's people making such a self indulgent drama about a life phase.

None of what the OP describes is about the baby at all - for 2/3 of it the baby isn't born! It's not getting the benefit of or even aware of any of that nonsense.

Littlewelshridinghood · 10/02/2020 16:37

I don't think YABU. Never had a baby shower or gender reveal and my family knew better than to throw me one 😂 hate them kind of stuff, I find them pointless, unnecessary and boring. I know I'm in the minority feeling this way but it's just not for me.

Juliette20 · 10/02/2020 16:44

I had a baby shower in 2004, they aren't a new thing. Though it was new on me at the time, my friend wanted to do it, organised everything, and it was really lovely of her.

I can understand not wanting to go to all the events and you just have to be choosy on that front, but some of it does sound like envy. No-one paid me this much attention, wah. Also you must realise that it is exciting for them, particularly a first child.

TheVanguardSix · 10/02/2020 16:47

My People! They do exist! Grin
OP, talk to me!
It's just so tedious. I don't think I could keep up with it all now. I really don't. I suppose there are loads of young parents out there (probably a silent majority) who don't bother with all of that garbage and just crack on with being parents.

A colleague of mine called it a 'baby sprinkle' and I nearly vomitted. Permission to just show up at work and BYOG (Bring Your Own Gallows). Feel free to just do what you like with this colleague. You have my full support! Grin

Hypergear · 10/02/2020 16:51

I'm with you! Nothing more boring than a pregnant woman if you ask me (and I am one) 😂

ASureSign · 10/02/2020 16:51

It's either a boy or a girl. It's not that exciting

Haha that is so true 😂😂😂

onionface · 10/02/2020 16:52

I have a baby and I bloody hate baby showers and gender reveals. But naming ceremonies are fine, it just replaces a christening and I'd rather go to one than a christening because the religious stuff is boring. It's nice to celebrate a baby once it's here. Celebrating with showers and stuff before it's born safely seems odd to me, though.

ShesGotBetteDavisEyes · 10/02/2020 16:55

I’m so glad I’ve never been invited to a baby shower - self indulgent nonsense! My family are all very down to earth luckily.

WelcomeToShootingStars · 10/02/2020 17:05

Completely agree. I've no interest in babies, especially not babies that haven't even been born.

I opt out of all baby related events as I find them tedious as fuck.

Chillyourbeans · 10/02/2020 17:13

I'm a miserable old git but the baby shower thing makes me cringe - isn't it just a cutesy way of begging for presents? Burgh, nasty.

SachaStark · 10/02/2020 17:14

YANBU. We have a new four-week-old baby in the family, and she IS absolutely gorgeous.

However, I took my granny out for dinner with my mum and my aunties this week. My god, a full ten minutes between courses was dedicated to searching through multiple WhatsApp and Facebook messenger accounts to find EXACTLY the right video of the baby “trying to smile” (the first five videos found were not the correct one).

I had to get my book out to read before I ended up blurting out, “Oh my god, they are all the same videos!!”

messolini9 · 10/02/2020 17:18

God, I'd hate to have a sister like you

Conversely, @formerbabe, I'd love to have a sister kindhearted enough to conceal her boredom about my baby-excitement, & of such generous spirit that she shows up & plays along - multiple times! - despite her private reservations.

Since when was having a feeling, & being wise enough not to act on it, constitute a crime?

Redglitter · 10/02/2020 17:21

Itd be a cold day in hell before I went to a gender reveal party or a baby shower. Thankfully my friends are now past that stage

codenameduchess · 10/02/2020 17:21

Here here OP! Tedious as fuck all of it! I'm one of that silent group of new (young? Is 30 still young?) parents not pissing about.

It's a boy or a girl, we don't need a tacky af reveal 'party' (it's not a party is it, it's a big 'look at me' and 'give me presents!') because nobody really cares outside of the parents and maybe grandparents. Baby showers are the same, christenings give me the rage because most of them are non-churchgoers who have seen an opportunity to get more gifts and attention- usually after a reveal and baby shower.

I'd like to be back to the good old days where there wasn't the need to insta every life event...

Formermousemat · 10/02/2020 17:21

I love it when people have babies, love seeing photographs and so on.

However I do find the increasing amount of fuss over pregnant women a bit distasteful and I think it also creates a lot of pressure on women at a time in their lives when they need it least. It's not enough to be pregnant now, now you need a gender reveal and baby shower, with the accompanying instagram photographs of course.

I'm not superstitious usually but the events before the baby is born do worry me, especially now as we have very sadly experienced a friend losing a baby at full term. The friend in question didn't have a baby shower thank goodness, I can't imagine how much more painful it would have been to have to look back through photographs of that in the circumstances.

Pigsmightfly212 · 10/02/2020 17:24

I understand where you are coming from.
When I had mine (and my youngest is only 9) there wasn't all the gender reveal, name reveal, baby shower hype.
If there was I'm sure I would have opted out of it but everyone is different.

EllieQ · 10/02/2020 17:29

@stormciarathegale A naming ceremony is the non-religious equivalent of a christening - we had guideparents rather than godparents, and a celebrant from the Humanist Society rather than a priest/ vicar. It’s nothing to do with revealing the baby’s name!

We had a naming ceremony as neither of us are religious, so having a christening seemed hypocritical.

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