There's always one annoying fucker...

[SaltedPretzel]

....who has to comment on what you're having for lunch!!

Work in an office full of blokes which is fine but one of them annoys the living crap out of me. He's quite a snob anyway and I'm not fond of him but he has the most annoying habit of always commenting on my lunch.

Today is spag bol - "bloody hell! That's a plate full, you're never gonna eat all that are you?"
Last week - "That's a box of salad!!" It was a fucking Tupperware box.
And so forth.

He regularly comments on the cleaner's weigh too when she has left. Bear in mind she has three young children and is at most is a size 14. Not that it's anyone else's business what size she is.

AIBU to get aggravated at this guy? Anyone else have to suffer with people like this?

Ahh this thread brings me so much joy!
New guy at work feels the need to comment on any morsel that makes it to my mouth and I’m ready to smoosh it in his face.

For context I’m heavily pregnant. I have a balanced diet but am just at the point where I’m so waddley and fed up that if I fancy a sausage sarnie from the canteen on a Tuesday breakfast I’m bloody well having one. He on the other hand has a pasty and chips every day and I’m yet to work out if he can spell fruit let alone eat it but I keep that to myself

The other day he had a sausage sandwich. I went to get one about half an hour later “oooh is that my fault you got a naughty breakfast!!?” No Brian. I just fancied it, it’s not all about you.

Lunch times - once, just once all week I got cheesy chips - ooooh having a chippy lunch today are we? I always mean to get something healthy but never do either. EITHER?? Looking past the salad I had yesterday or the leftover balanced dinner I bought in the day before.... gah it makes me so mad. It’s so inane and implies I’m a greedy glutton who can do nothing but follow his food choices.

Oh, Winging. Feeling your pain. Next time you have lunch, please hear me roar "fuck you Brian!" as you give him some seriously snarky side eye.

I work with mostly women and hate lunch comments. I dont want people to say anything about my food.
It always turns into a public discussion of carbs, gluten, weight, organic, healthy vs unhealthy. So boring.

I love the food police comment!

My suggestion was going to be that you reply with a very serious “Why are you so obsessed with me?!” Then wait a few beats and cackle hysterically.

Did this with my office fashion police chief and he’s never commented on my attire again.

What I eat or what I weigh is none of your concern, unless I'm sitting on your face

While this is funny af, the guy sort of sounds like an abusive, misogynistic twat and that comment could backfire.

See, I don't eat at work anymore
(I work in a kitchen) because the minute I do sit down and start eating, colleagues seem to descend like vultures and start commenting on what I'm eating or asking questions, to the point where I feel like it's a 'crime' to have a bloody break and have some food. This wouldn't have bothered me years ago, but its gotten to the point where I now basically have food issues, rubbed off from other people, when all I want to do is just have 5 mins to fuel up without having to justify what I'm eating or give a detailed account of all the components of the thing I'm eating. It almost feels like people are talking to me while I'm on the toilet 😂

I eat a meal efore I go to work, have a smoothie and graze during, and eat a meal after. And now I get quizzed because people 'never see me eating.' People need to mind their bloody business and worry about themselves.

Does he ever do this to any blokes? If not, I would ask him to repeat the question, and then say “I thought you said that. You see, I’ve noticed you do this a lot... this commenting on the amount of food I eat. You never comment on the amount of food any of the men here eat. It’s really very rude. So are the comments you make about the cleaner. How about you quit making stupid sexist comments and looking like an idiot, and I don’t go to HR?”

I laying here at nearly 4am, brain on overdrive as going through a horrendous time and some of these comments have had me crying with laughter. This morning I felt like I’d never laugh again!!! Thank you wise mums netters!

I especially liked the comment about narrating your own lunch

“Enormous sandwich for me today....” 🤣

Op please try and use as much of these as possible this week, with any luck we will be seeing a post in AIBU....”someone at work keeps making snotty comments everytime I discuss lunch with her, my ego is bruised - what do I do?!”

Hot day - I made myself an iced coffee using SKIM milk in the office - resident knob made a comment "should you be drinking that??" - my reply "says you who stinks from just having a fag outside!"
He actually replied "I don't smoke any more - it's an e-cigarette" - yeah, you keep telling yourself that, buddy.

The world is full of CF's

A bit of very frank swearing can be quite effective, especially if you don’t you wouldn’t normally. I would be tempted to respond “Fuck off” every time he did it. Don’t pretty it up at all. Just look him straight in the eye and say “Fuck off” with as much dislike behind it as you can muster. Not sounding upset about the comment, you just want dislike of him to come through.

Not appropriate for every workplace, but if you won’t get sacked for it it’s probably one of the most effective ways of handling him.

I hated the canteen at lunchtime, as someone would always have something to say. So I eventually learned to eat at my desk. Then I used to go to the gym at lunchtime, rush back and eat my sandwich while not officially on my lunch break at my desk - but I always felt people were judging me. It's so weird!

There were the salad girls though who took over the canteen (well, more like a big kitchen). They were proper Mumsnetters. Mounds of salad lol. I mean, mounds! They were all relatively slim but always seemed to be on some sort of diet of some sort.

I don't like people commenting on what I'm eating. I find it rude. I would never comment on whatever anyone else eats - though I'm fascinated how much food men can get through!

He sounds like one of those men/people who are trying to find a reason to comment on your size/weight - his comments about portion size would probably be a lead into "you'll get fat if you eat that much" etc., especially as he's been commenting on the cleaner's weight/size.

I think I would deal with it with a deadpan stare and "oh WELL done - you can tell what it my lunch is, that's aMAZing" and then resume eating it while staring at him.

As others have said, there's no need to comment on someone else's lunch unless it's to find out what it is because it looks/smells great!

I can’t stand it when people comment on my food, I just say “it’s the height of bad manners to comment on someone’s food” that usually shuts them up

I don’t think you need to engage in any witty comments or clever comebacks, why should we have to outwit a person who creates uncomfortable situations? As a pp mentioned this can sometimes end in more confrontation.

I agree with the pp who just say call him out on it by saying how rude he is to make comments about both of you, make it a statement not a question. It’s misogynistic behaviour targeting women, it pisses me off that we have to learn strategies to deflect men like this.

I totally understand how you feel OP. I'm probably a little sensitive as I've had food issues all of my adult life. Don't mind comments about how nice it looks or asking what I've got, but when it's about the amount - bore off. I also used to work with a woman who thought it was ok to comment negatively if I'd lost weight - "Don't lose any more," type comments. She also asked me if my husband found me boring because I didn't drink! Rude! He's a dick, ignore him

How hot are your HR?
Maybe you should mention that targeting women for shaming could be seen as casual sexism? Could shut him up?!

I'm with you. My office mate does this too - always wants to know what I'm eating. I bluntly told him as soon as he started working with me that I would have no food shaming and to knock off saying something was "naughty". I'm a larger lady and do not take kindly to anyone policing what I eat. So he got that message. But now he brings me Creme Eggs and the like when he goes out. Which is better, I guess, but I still wish he would just stay out of my food business. He's a bit of a foodie, and I think he is just doing it to try to be friendly, but it irks.

Try "please stop policing what I eat and commenting on people's weight."

Dave you always seem to have a comment about my lunch or the cleaners weight. Tell me are you a misogynist or just a knob?

If it were me I'd reply with "Have you ever noticed the obsession you have developed with food? I can recommend a good counsellor if that would help?

Seriously. In this instance the onus needs to be pushed back onto his conduct rather than continuing to focus on yours.

I used to work with someone like this! Every lunchtime he would quiz me over what I had for lunch and then make comments like "diet going well is it?"
It was always in the lunch room full of people. I know I should have had a go but i was just so embarrassed from his comments and the pitying looks from colleagues that I just wanted the interrogation to stop.
It got to the point that if I fancied a bit of cake for lunch I would eat it quickly in another room so he didn't see me eat it and then comment on me eating it in front of eveyone.

Just keep asking him to repeat what he said - 'sorry, I didn't quite catch that', or similar...he will soon realise how stupid he sounds. A couple of days if that should sort him out!

I would just tell him he's rude.

Believe it or not, he likes you!

There's this thing men do when they like a woman.... They put then down.

So next time he comes.over and says something, just say.... Look it's nice you notice my food, but I don't fancy you, so stop trying to chat me up!

Say it loud enough for.people.to.look.

He'll never come near you again.