"Oh, we get away with it all the time" sounds like such a cool, fun, relaxed way to live your life.
"Yes, we're thieves - career criminals, no less" not quite so much.
However, the stark difference between these two is.........
I also think it's disgusting that waitresses and waiters are expected to act as security and make good on thefts. The 'justification' might be that they need to be on their guard and 'make sure' that people pay. That's all well and good in the case of forgetful people, or even chancers who are trying their luck but mumble embarrassed excuses and pay up immediately when challenged. But what happens with the determined thieves (like OP's ex-friends), who have no intention of paying, might get aggressive and could even have a weapon? 12 members of the local rugby team who have decided that they are not going to pay and tell the petite 18yo uni student waitress this in no uncertain terms, maybe telling her they know her and where she lives - and she just has to lump it and is forced to subsidise these criminals?
I wonder how people who do this would feel if their boss just told them on payday that they weren't going to be paid for the last week of the month. No problem with their work at all, the boss just thinks s/he might be able to get away with it, as it sometimes works if you tough it out. How well would that go down?
Incidentally, I don't consider the serial complainers any different at all from the runners. There's nothing wrong at all with raising genuine concerns about your meal early on and seeking to get it rectified; but we all know the sort who plan from the very start that they'll go for a lovely meal, enjoy eating the whole lot and then come out with any number of excuses and refuse to pay.
My FIL used to know a couple like this who invested in a video camera (back when they were still very expensive) for the sole purpose of taking it on holiday, recording footage to apparently show their accommodation in a very poor light (whether made to look far worse than it was or completely concocted e.g. collecting cockroaches when out in the wild and then filming them in the kitchen) and then using it as 'proof' to get their money back. Unlike most decent (or extremely rich) people, they just booked whatever holiday they wanted, with no regard to the cost of it, as they knew from the very start that they wouldn't be paying for it.
I'd consider it an expensive but ultimately worthwhile lesson on what these people are really like and that they are not to be trusted. As a PP said, if that's their normal MO for life, don't think you'll be immune if ever they end up owing you money and just deciding not to pay you. In fact, I'd say they're much more likely to try to steal from somebody they perceive as less of a threat. If you stick around with them, it won't be long before they pull you straight down with them - and if you dare to protest, you become the bad guy. People like this are just vexatious to the soul.
DD is a waitress.
She’s had this happen countless times and she says it’s not just the loss of money. It’s the fact that people have cooked their food, served them, waited on their table, made polite conversation, and then it all gets shoved back in their face because the customers are immature selfish twats who have no consideration for anyone but themselves.
Yes, this exactly. You've invested in forming a nice working relationship in good faith and worked hard to serve and please them, so that they can have a wonderful evening. Then, in return, they treat you like a non-human commodity, your time, efforts and feelings worth absolutely nothing to them. It's a very nasty con trick. It's not like just grabbing a laptop in Currys and running out with it (not that that is in any way the right thing to do either).