To be so bloody anxious about something so bloody stupid?

[Gimmeashake]

NC for this. I've a presentation to do on Monday in front of my team. I am ridiculously nervous about it - I think it's the shame of feeling anxious (and of others noticing) that makes it so much worse than it should be. The daft thing is, my job involves lots of anxiety provoking situations, for example, training groups of people, making difficult decisions, working with v risky people and so on. I'm fairly confident on the whole and I think other people would see me this way. However. Talking in this formal setting in front of my peers...it's my worst nightmare. I feel like it's this shameful secret and I'm about to get found out It's worse recently (perhaps just a general increase in work stress, worrying about my son atm and so on) to the point that my voice will really shake and my anxiety will spiral in to full blown panic. I'm dreading it. How do others manage their anxiety in these situations? I think it's slightly more than 'normal' nerves IYSWIM and I really want to get a grip. Honestly, I think it holds me back and I'd love to know how everyone seems to manage so much better than I do. Any advice much appreciated!

YANBU. Everyone hates presentations.

Have a glass of water handy. You can pause to take a drink if you're getting anxious or you lose your place. It looks more natural thank standing looking worried

I’ve read that public speaking, even in small and familiar situations, tops the list of many people’s worst fears! I was once told to practise saying my piece over and over again, literally so often that all emotion including anxiety had just drained away. It
worked.
Best of luck xx

Practice in front of a mirror. Slow your speech write down and project your voice, keep practicing.
When you are doing the presentation remember that people are there because they are genuinely interested in what you have to say.

You need beta blockers. Take an hour before said presentation and they will completely eliminate all the physical symptoms of anxiety (heart beating fast, shaking, trembling voice). Ok you may still mentally be nervous but the fact that the physical symptoms are kept in check is an enormous relief. They are honestly worth their weight in gold. Please don’t confuse them with sedative-like medication such as Diazepam. They’re nothing like that, they just block adrenaline.

Record yourself and keep saying it over and over and over again.
You will be ok. Everyone hates giving presentations.

Just think of it like you are acting. The curtain goes up and you are on. Your job is to get it over with as cleanly as possible. All you can do is rehearse.

I think you would be surprised at how many people would also be nervous in these situations! I work in similar sounding role and I would be anxious, as would most of my colleagues I imagine in this situation.

I go flushed when anxious so I just make sure I wear something high neck/more make up that day to disguise it. I also make sure can rest my hands on something, like lectern or a table if possible to hide hands so others can't see them shaking.

Just remember your nerves will improve as soon as you start talking and people won't be able to tell how nervous you are feeling!

Lots of people get nervous.
The top tip I received was to at least know how you are going to start and how you are going to end. It does really help.
Practise - in front of the mirror, to family or friends, to your cat.
And most people are nice, even if you seem nervous.

Yeah, I relate to this.

I recently accepted a job that involves giving presentations--in French. My French is crap. I was bricking it because a. I'm terrible at public speaking and b. My French is shit.

But you know what?

No-one gvies5 a shit if you are crap because they're too involved with their own insecurities. They really are.

Best thing you can do is :

Listen to empowering music just before.

Act. Quite simply, pretend to be someone else. I do this all the time. I pretend I'm Diane Lockheart.

BANG!

You can do it.

Breathe. In and out slowly. Sorts out blushing as well as other symptoms.

Hold something. Flask of tea, jacket, anything to hide the shakes.

Make a joke at the beginning ONLY if you're funny. I find a very deadpan, "please hold the applause until the end" works well.

If all else fails remember that even if you are wildly nervous all anyone will be thinking is "thank fuck it's not me up there".

I would start off by saying "I don't know why , but you lot make me more nervous than any other group of people I know!" It will disarm them and relax you.

Short term - beta blockers. Ask your doctor for Propranolol, 40mg.

Long term - meditation.

I feel your pain. That would be my worst nightmare come true. Feeling prepared helps, so loads of practice to a friend who can be honest if your repeating yourself or 'ummibg' you too much (makes you look like you've not much clue what you're doing). What works for me too is imagine they're all sat their naked, the horrificness of the image makes them seem way, way less scary!

I so feel your pain OP. My nerves make me ill before a presentation and when it’s your peers it’s ten times worse. My heart goes out of rhythm, my legs shake and my mouth goes like tissue paper, as if I’ve eaten numerous cream crackers without a drink. I don’t sleep at all the night before and I mean at all, which of course exacerbates all these issues. However, somehow I always manage to get through it. I eventually realised that for me, the fear was of people looking at me; actually directly at me. I feel that they can see my fear. So for me I would not be able to do a presentation without PowerPoint, or other forms of visual distraction for those watching. When I go through the first couple of slides I devise little moments when the audience has to reflect on one of the points made on the screen or has to discuss a point with the person next to them which takes the focus off me. I find these little distractions give me time to take a breath and calm myself. Once I know they’re not staring at me I gradually gather confidence and can get into my stride which will hopefully allow me to forget about the being looked at phobia. The adrenaline which up to this point has been a destructive thing then seems to work for me as I’m so relieved and generally things go well from that point. Also can you put the onus on them at any point? Give them a small task to do where someone has to feed back? Another thing that works for me is not to let anyone know about my terror. I pretend I’m not bothered at all so they’re not expecting me to be fearful. Sorry to sound like a lunatic!

I got rid of some of my nerves by realising that when I’m in the audience watching a presenter, if they cough or lose their place or accidentally turn off the presentation or whatever, as an observer I don’t give a shit. I’m probably only half listening if it’s a boring subject anyway, or thinking about my response to what they’re saying if it’s relevant to me. I won’t be concentrating on the speaker themselves in any way.

Once I realised that’s how the audience probably feel when I’m presenting, I calmed down quite a lot!

Good luck, just try to put it out of your mind for now. It’s happening, it’ll be fine, and if it goes a bit wrong, no one watching gives a fuck really 😆

Beta blockers definitely. As previous poster said, one tablet an hour before and your hands will be steady, your voice won’t wobble and your legs won’t shake. So you can be as nervous as anything but no one will know.

There is no shame in being anxious. Most people are very anxious about giving presentations. Learn the damn thing off by heart as much as you can. Before you start, just say - sorry, presentations make me nervous but I'll do my best. Don't worry if you have voice shake and stumble at first - you will get into your stride. Being anxious is OK it is just part of being human, not a hanging offence.

A long term help for me was someone filming me speaking (on a v familiar topic to me, in front of other students like me at the time). Watching myself on playback in front of the group made me realise I wasn't all that bad. A looong way from how I thought I'd come across (tongue tied, quiet voice etc). A lot of the anxiety for me is to look a fool in front of people I want to impress. Also, I came to realise that although we all love the really great speakers that make us relaxed and enjoy their talks, most speakers are just dull, ordinary, not natural entertainer types - just like me. So that helped too. I bloody wish I knew about beta blockers though - that would have helped a great deal!

After 30 years I still get massively nervous and I do a job where I have to do presentations a lot. Over the years I've learned to cope. This is what I try and do:

1. Do plenty of slides so people are looking at the screen rather than me. Allow about a minute a slide.
2. Rehearse so I know the presentation really well
3. Tell people at the start to save questions for the end - that way i can concentrate on getting the presentation done and not lose track of where I am. So I kind of do my presentation rehearsed and repeated rather than free format
4. If I'm standing hold onto something to stop fidgeting with anything
5. Remember everyone in the room is either interested, wants to learn or is on your side. You wouldn't be doing the presentation unless you have something meaningful to share with everyone

Good luck - I will genuinely be thinking about you on Monday.

p.s. I also listen to "How to disappear completely" by Radiohead on repeat on the morning of the presentation. Ane Brun has a beautiful cover version as well.

Oh my word... these responses are SO validating, I cannot thank you all enough. @Pol16 not lunacy at all! I completely agree with looking at me fear.
I might get myself some beta blockers too for added calm, they sound magical .... can I really see a GP for them or just go to a pharmacy?
I have taken on board all of your tips. Thanks again- this is when I love mumsnet (this and parking threads with diagram of course).

It's really normal to be more self-conscious in front of people who you you know or have to see again, than strangers - and most of your peers will have been in that situation and know how it feels!

Remember, though, that your audience won't be half so aware of your nerves as you are - they can't hear your pulse, they don't know if you're hot or cold, or if your mouth is dry, and they won't know if you miss a bit or something you planned to say comes out wonky. You will come across better than you think you do.

If you haven't taken beta blockers before, don't do it just for a presentation! I was prescribed them for migraines and they made me feel absolutely awful.

All of the other tips are great. Best of luck with it.

You’ll need to see your GP for beta-blockers. I don’t like them because weirdly I need the adrenaline to perform well in spite of the adverse effects. However, I respect the views of the guys on here who say they’ve been helpful so it’s worth a discussion with the doc. Good luck!!

Practice four square breathing beforehand - it's the bit before which is nerve wracking, once you get going you'll be fine x

I once presented to 400 people when I thought there were going to be about 90...worked wonders