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Original poster

Small house no commute vs bigger house and commute

111 replies

MapMySleighRide · 29/01/2020 19:57

We are looking to buy our first home and have, hopefully, a few options open to us. Either a new build but small mid terraced house right in the centre of our town (it is on an estate and noise isnt an issue), this would mean I would have a barely 5 min commute twice per day and dh about 20-30 min commute each way. The garden is small but our dc aren't hugely sporty or outdoorsy and while I like the idea of country idyll (vegetable patch, chickens etc) I'm not sure I'd ever actually get round to doing it! It is also A rated so lower elec bills and warm, the mortgage would be higher tho as it is expensive.

Or we could go further afield, add a good 20-30 mins to our commute each, so about 30 mins for me each way but 1 hour for dh each way. We could get a bigger house, as in a semi with hopefully a slightly bigger garden, but it would be an older house that would need doing up cosmetically, possibly cold and draughty as a lot of our rentals have been, but I could one day have chickens and get off my arse and grow stuff!

Our dc are 15 and 10 if it makes a difference

AIBU to ask for your advice please on what you would go for? Sorry I've posted here for traffic. I think the only thing putting me off the new build is that it is smaller than I remembered it being in my head, but also it is our first house so I am worried about making the wrong decision as we'll be stuck with it for donkeys years and after almost 20 years renting I am a bit nervous of being stuck somewhere we're not sure on...help!!

OP posts:
Disfordarkchocolate · 30/01/2020 07:54

Short commute for me every time. I love being able to walk to school, shops, work etc. I like the garden but even with active children I'd rather they/we went to the park regularly.

We picked the town we live for its facilities and good schooling. The house we eventually bought is central, it's great coming home from the cinema in 10 minutes on foot. Declutter, think about storage with everything you buy (this will also save money) and enjoy the extra free time.

BrokenLogs · 30/01/2020 07:55

We are wondering about this as at the moment dh has an 1 hr 10 min commute both ways and mine is 20 mins.

To bring dh's commute down to 30 mins would mean paying double the cost of our current house.

We are mortgage free and picking up a AUD500k mortgage makes me want to weep 😩

mindutopia · 30/01/2020 07:56

Bigger house, longer commute. I wouldn’t buy a new build either personally.

But then again a 20-30 minute commute is a short commute to me. I won’t even tell you what him is!

Egghead68 · 30/01/2020 07:57

Short commute. You won’t regret it.

Ukholidaysaregreat · 30/01/2020 07:58

Your kids will soon want to meet friends in town. Living centrally will stop you being a taxi service.

BoxedWine · 30/01/2020 07:58

I would say the short commute in a flash but only thing is, what about the air quality? If it's a lot worse in the centre that might be a factor. That said, you mention a town not a city so might not be too much of a problem?

TheDarkPassenger · 30/01/2020 08:02

Honestly I’d want to live in town for the kids but I wouldn’t buy a terraced new build. New builds are nice but the walls are like paper and I support people at work with housing issues sometimes and it is always new build semis or terraces!

An old terrace with proper walls in town would be my suggestion, especially if it’s your forever home

SmellMySmellbow · 30/01/2020 08:03

Short commute. You're not long away from your kids wanting to meet their mates in town every evening, so if you live 30 mins away that's an extra hour per day ferrying them back and forth. Get an allotment.

VirtualHamster · 30/01/2020 08:03

I'd go for a longer commute as in this case it sounds like the house is actually too small. I'd quite happily sacrifice space for a better commute but not to the extent that we're cramped.

SmellMySmellbow · 30/01/2020 08:04

Ps my old Victorian terrace in town has walls like paper, is cold and damp and needs lots of money spent on it. My next home will be a new build!

averythinline · 30/01/2020 08:05

20-30 min doesnt sound like a long commute to me .... but would depend on whether you could walk to stuff/ DC get bus into town etc...

I would be nervous about buying somewhere that feels small...
and am not a fan of new builds.... but they can be v practical...

in a way it will depend on what feels small if everyine has a bedroom big enough for a decent bed/wardrobes etc

and is there enough living room ?- with options to stay together/split up
people say teens live in their room ours don't but we have large kitchen diner and seperate 'living room' and they do swop between those... dh and i spend most time in kitchen diner as there is room there for sofa and tv...
although if your dcs prefer their own room are they big enough for them to work/chill out there...? have you been to look at the new bed with all of you....

MiniTheMinx · 30/01/2020 08:07

If I wasn't working and DC were younger I'd buy a bigger semi rural or rural and do "idyllic" but your DC are teens, will want to be more independent with their social lives, and not too many years from leaving home. I'd go for the smaller newer house in town. less expense on maintenance, travel and bills Closer to sources of entertainment and social activities where that extra income can give you and two teens the freedom to have a life outside your four walls.

We are having similar discussions here. DS off to university in September, DS 15 years very independent already. Both of us work, and despite working little left over to have a social life. Travel costs of over £400 a month. We are thinking of moving to a flat from a big semi, and looking for something smack bang in the centre. We intend to spend everything saved on housing costs enjoying life. oh.....and less bloody housework and cooking too Smile

NoMilk · 30/01/2020 08:13

Smaller house.

Your DH wont be wasting 40 hours a month commuting.

Your energy bills should reduce in cost also. Im in a new build. I pay £50 in total a month gas & electric, no heating on the past few days and Im wearing a T.Shirt indoors.

The house is cool in the summer.

I do a school run & commute to work which is also about 5 mins each way from home and currently spend around £10 a week on fuel including driving to the beach on Sundays, which is 10 mins away.

Go for it Smile

Bookbandconfusion · 30/01/2020 08:13

I'd go bigger house if you don't mind being kids' taxi service. Doesn't sound like a particularly long commute to me. I live in a small mid-terrace and it feels very claustrophobic. Can't wait to move!

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 30/01/2020 08:17

Depends how small is small? I guess your kids are pass the age of needing lots of room for toys and as they get older it would be better if they were closer to town.
Will be harder to make money off a new build. Do you have money to invest in the older house and make more profit in the long term?

JiltedJohnsJulie · 30/01/2020 08:18

Could you get an allotment for escaping to growing vegetables?

billy1966 · 30/01/2020 08:21

No commute and the children being able to get everywhere easily.

Even though we are in a super convenient spot with great public transport, I still do a lot of dropping and collecting.

I hate to think what it would be like if we weren't where we are.

De-clutter as much as is possible and I second the garden room.

My friend has one with electrics, properly insulated and her daughters adore it.

My son's would love one too, if it had all the comforts!..... we don't need it, but they love the idea of "their own gaff" at the end of the garden away from us😂

Newcornishmama · 30/01/2020 08:24

We are in a similar situation. We have chosen less sq ft in favour of no/short commute. I can't bring myself to buy a newbuild though, so will still be going for a slightly older property.

It's not forever- our plan is to review again in 5 years or so.

movingdilemma1234 · 30/01/2020 08:24

Short commute every time
Your life is for living not for spending hours travelling to a job in order to live

Gazelda · 30/01/2020 08:34

Shorter commute + allotment + summer house/den for the kids + loft conversion in the future?

piercedmyfootonaspike · 30/01/2020 08:38

We went for the bigger house and commute....we're counting down until we can move, would never do it again! We are all so exhausted with the commute and it's such a waste of the day. It also means we can only use the car as there's no public transport which we don't like for environmental reasons as well. In our previous house we could walk/cycle or get the bus, we just couldn't afford a 3 bed anywhere in that area so had to move further out. Also, your children will become more independent as they get older and living close to everything would be better for you and them

SluggishSnail · 30/01/2020 08:43

How likely are you both to stay in the same jobs?

Alaimo · 30/01/2020 08:45

Just to say you don't need a big garden for growing stuff. I have a city centre flat with garden, and manage to grow quite a bit of veg. Nowhere near self sufficiency but enough to have something homegrown a few times a week for 6 months/year. If anything, I found a small garden easier to get started, it felt less overwhelming somehow. No pressure to revamp the whole garden/turn into a farmer overnight, just start with one raised bed and a couple of packs of seeds and take it from there.

Apart from that, how stressful would the longer commute be? I find a slightly longer commute not too bad if you can just catch a regular, quiet, bus from nearby, listen to a podcast and arrive at your destination 45min later. On the other hand, if your (or DH) commute would involve packed buses, 3 changes, with the added stress of missed connections, then that's a whole different kettle of fish.

Happyandglorious · 30/01/2020 08:48

Smaller house bc of location. Will make the kids and your life so much simpler.

AnnPerkins · 30/01/2020 09:05

Short commute. Every time. No hesitation.

What is your DH’s view? His commute would be doubling.

Your kids will need taxiing to school, college, parties and friends’ houses as well as part-time jobs very soon. They won’t learn independence if they have to rely on their parents for everything.

We lived 10 miles out for 7 years. With school, work and clubs I was driving up and down that sodding A-road up to six times a day. Now we live centrally we have been able to get rid of one car.