Do you 'Expect' to Benefit from Your Parent's Will

[Pembsgirl]

My parents had nothing, so having no 'expectations' of an inheritance in years to come, I worked hard for everything I've got, but so many people own their own homes now, so am I being unreasonable in thinking that the vast majority of people these days 'expect' to benefit from their parent's Will, and wonder how they'd feel if parents left it all to people other than their children?

When dad died he left everything to my DSM she totally deserved it. In theory she's leaving it to the 11 DHC but I'm pretty dubious. I fear she'll I'll either leave it to her boyfriend or to my elder brother. She's in her 80s so time will tell.

My dad refuses to talk about his will but my mum has said I will get something, however I have skirted about the issue that both of them to either give me a token amount and leave it in trust to DS or just leave it in trust to DS I am not to be trusted with money.

I expect it in the sense that I assume it's likely that they'll leave most of whatever there is to me and my siblings. But I'm not bothered about it and I'm certainly not depending on it or anything! And of course there may be not anything to leave if they have to pay for care.

No.

They have assets but I imagine they will be left to my younger and still living at home, financially dependent siblings. Even though they’re adults.

Scapegoat child here. It is what it it.

Currently all left in trust for DGC (as my GPs did for me and DSis)

However, this entirely depends on the money not going on care homes etc.

I'm an only child, my parents are quite anti social and so yeah I do expect it I guess. I won't care at the time as my dad has been my anchor my whole life and the thought of losing him is horrific.

I expect my children will do well from their inheritance as he's absolutely besotted with them

I know I'm getting 1/3 of the house and 1/5 of the other assets, I'm the executor and I've seen it. My brothers get the same and my kids get 1/5 each of the assets. Household stuff just whoever wants but I'm getting my grandmothers teapots - lucky me mum says "I always liked them" yes when I was 6! My parents are young considering my age, I strongly suspect the money will be spent on carehomes though

I sort of do, yes. There are a few properties and investments and my mum is very organised about these things. However my dad has Parkinson's and I strongly suspect a lot of money will be spent on care. Which I fully support.

DH and I only have our mothers left, both 80. They are open about their wills, Which will be equally split between their children. My mother inherited from my dad when he died and has since remarried but I don’t expect anything from him even though he has no other family and is comfortably off, they treat their finances separately.
We also have elderly single childless relatives who have intimated that we would inherit something from them too.
When we die, our children will inherit equally from us.

My dad will spilt what he has between us I assume cos he’s said so but he doesn’t have a lot and I’m not expecting it. I wouldn’t contest his wishes if he decided to do something else

Would like to add, my siblings and I actively encouraged my parents to enjoy their money, my mother travelled widely and still enjoys spending. MIL is happily very frugal!!

I don't count on it and wouldn't expect them to automatically leave me anything. That's their money to do with as they wish. DH's parents have lots of money and several houses and always say "this is for the kids when we go" but they do absolutely nothing with their money, don't enjoy it or make the most of it. DH wishes they would enjoy their life and their money rather than constantly saving every penny for him and his brothers. Be sensible, sure, but what's the point of working your arse off needlessly and never enjoying it?

My.parents will leave everything to their children, which i like as we are all equal. My mum has no money, just the house. If either of them need care, it will mostly go but I've never expected it as they both have bad health. Some of us have bought without parental help.

Expectation is a worry as it seems my dad feels pressure to save in order to leave us money - he's got at least 10 years to go and if he needs care, it will go anyway. Trying to gently argue the point but think will just be blunt as hate the idea of him skimping his last years when none of us are expecting anything.

Of course I expect it! In as much as I’d be shocked if they left it to anyone else other than their children & grandchildren.

I assume my kids expect to get all of our assets when we die. Who else would I leave it to?

I've been so shocked by recent threads around inheritances.. I'm Irish and there is generally a expectation of anything you get is a bonus rather than an expectation.

On Mumsnet there seem to be some strange (to me) rules about inheritance
. Parents have to leave their money to the children( no one else) even if they have been no contact with one or all of them,
Parents can not financially reward one child over an other even if they have been their sole carer for 20 years.
Parents have to leave it equally between their kids regardless if one is a millionaire and one is homeless on the street
Stepgrandchildren are to be treated like grand children regardless if they've been in the family 10 years or 10 minutes

Recent threads about inheritance have really surprised me..

There was the lady who had been nc with her mother all her adult life and was appalled and totally shocked that her mother had given her house to her sister who always had a good relationship looked after her for the last number of years .
Then there is the lady who plans on contesting her mothers will because she didn't feel she got enough.

My parents always told us they would pay for us to go to university in lieu of inheritance. We're all happy with that .

I will inherit half of a vast estate worth many millions ......

But I am hoping my parents live for very many years and I don’t inherit until I am retired myself.

I have never once thought about my inheritance when I have been planning my life / career as my parents may live longer than me

Its their money, they earned it and they can enjoy and spend it all as far as I am concerned. When they have told me about their will, I don't really listen as likely it would be taken up by care fees. If they gave it to charity I wouldn't care either. If it was someone I knew Id be emotionally hurt but Id get over it. Its only money, they gave me life. I dont like thinking about their passing.

@bedroomdilemma, my parents’ farm, jointly owned by bachelor uncle was left solely to my brother. A will was made in a rush, ‘just for the time’ as bachelor uncle, who owned half the farm was ill. That was traditionally what the family did, leave it all to the son. Us three sisters all had already inherited a barn to renovate in parents’ lifetime. Sadly all three, parents and our uncle died within seven months of each other in 1988. Our lovely brother then did a ‘deed of variation’ which fairly divided things up between the four of us. It avoided inheritance tax as well as ensured that our relationships remained good. Brother, the youngest, was only 24 when they died and he has been dealing with things ever since, gradually selling off land and old barns. There was no actual money to inherit but over the years we have all received small amounts of money from sales which has helped us and our families. It may sound a lot but back then one barn was sold for 15k, divide that three ways and our share paid for a few maintenance jobs around the house.
Our parents worked hard and lived quite a frugal life and we would have rather they had lived longer and were able to enjoy a more relaxed retirement.

We intend leaving whatever we have to be divided equally between our three offspring. All in their 30s and only one has just bought a property. Hoping care fees will not erode it! Currently looking into wills. Think maybe we can will each half of house to the kids so that when first one of us dies, half of the house is then owned by the kids. Would reduce total assets for the one left behind.

Sorry this is so long. Just trying to be helpful!

My dad died a while ago now and Mum owns the house.
There are 6 of us though so I know I will get some inheritance when the house sells after she's gone but have no idea of 'my share'. Depends on the house market at the time.

Dreading it. 2 eldest brothers are money grabbing wankers though so am expecting arguments about mums possessions, car, jewellery etc.

Law where im from from makes sure me and my siblings will get an inheritance. My parents are fairly comfortable for pensioners but I'm definately not counting on inheritance. I hope my parents will be around for a long time and I hope they will use their money to live full loves in the next decades.

no
my parents are already dead and left only debt
DH's parents had him very young, and are healthy, so if there is anything left after (hypothetical) care home fese we could well be in our 70s before that time comes. Also SIL is far less financially secure than we are, and I would absolutely understand them leaving a will that considerably favours her.

Just depends I suppose on whether they end up needing to go into care homes.
I would expect to inherit whatever is left, yes, but depending on how their final years pan out and whether they have care needs or not that will change a lot. I’m not planning on getting anything.

@Crazycrazylady , I totally agree with you. Only on MN have I seen such expectations of inheritance, almost to the point of planning how the money will be spent the moment the parent start to feel unwell, if not sooner.

I have absolutely no idea what my parents will leave me if anything and I couldn't care less. Same with my OH. We are proud to have made a decent life for ourselves to have invested for our retirement. My parents worked very hard too all their lives, always aspiring to better themselves, working FT their entire life. They are enjoying their retirement and if they spend everything they have, good on them.

I see this money as theirs 100% and theirs to dispose as they wish. It is not my money to fantasize about.

@Brot64 the debt gets taken from the estate first or you can literally inherit debt?

From DM, I stand to inherit the house we live in if I haven't raised the funds to buy it from her, or moved on in the meantime, both of which are more likely to happen as she's young and in good health. From DF, I am aware i have been disinherited after 8 years of NC. I'm fine with that.

From maternal DGPs, i know i stand to inherit a large amount of rental property both residential and commercial, on the understanding that i can reap the benefits of the rental but if i sell 70% of proceeds go to my children.

From paternal DGPs, i am executor of their wills. I know that i am to sell everything and divide the proceeds between myself and the other 5 grandchildren once all fees are paid. They don't have a lot and their house isn't worth much so will likely be a small amount.

All of the above however is circumstantial on care requirements and their own desire to spend. I have no qualms about this. I don't expect anything from any of them and would rather they spend it on themselves.

I am on a very low income and do struggle some months but honestly, I cope just fine and am not relying on any of the above as i hope they all have many years in them yet!