Advice on inheritance disputes

[Ilovechinese]

Hi I'm just wondering if anyone on here has been to court to contest a will and if so how long did it take to get to court and what the process is. I'm going through this at the minute (well not got to court yet) but have a caveat in place to stop probate.

He didn’t make her do it, you need to stop going on about that.

To be honest when my mum died my sister and I got given the same sum of money. It went through my mind more than once that she didn’t deserve it as she wasn’t the one who was off work with stress to care for her and do all the things she needed, along with my dad.

She just swanned in for a visit once a week.

It doesn’t matter at all that you have kids and tour brother doesn’t. Not in the slightest.

Do you think that only people with children need money? I guess the rest of us just live on fresh air. We don't have to pay any bills or housing costs or eat,save for our future including care and never enjoy just doing nice things.

After the page 8 revelation you’re not coming across well op. As for saying because you’ve got kids and he doesn’t somehow you should have more - that’s absolute nonsense.
I am sorry about you losing your mum. Wish you well. I’m giving up trying to help here.

@Nicknacky and how do you know he didn't make her do it?? Do you know him? Were you there? I think I know better than you as I know the person and how the things they were saying to me way before the death indicated they were planning to take it all, and it's ironic you call me greedy yet just said when your mum died and left you and your sister equal amounts you thought she didn't deserve it.

Children should all be treated equally except in exceptional circumstances. If someone wants to leave everything to one child then they should only have one. Why would a mother or father treat their children differently?!

@Nicknacky maybe instead of having a go at someone who got barely anything and was left out and feeling bitter towards your sister you should be thankful your Mum was clearly a good Mum and loved you both equally (lucky you) that is worth far more than money.

Because you have NOTHING to say he made her do it.

And you are being greedy. You have received money and you don’t think it was enough. Was I greedy? Not particularly but if I had received more money because of the care I gave my mum and the neglect I caused my own family then I would have taken it without a second thought. The money was spent on improving my house which benefited my kids.

My mum didn’t leave the money to me. My dad gave me it.

And I’m not bitter toward my sister, i don’t give much of a fuck toward her and her conduct during our mums illness shows what she was like. Maybe your brother feels similar to me? Don’t under estimate the impact caring for a terminally ill person has on a family unit.

@rumandbiscuits thank you for sharing your experience. So how come you didn't take it to court (if you dont mind me asking) as others are telling me it's so hard to contest wills surely you would have won and she would have got nothing? Or did your solicitor advise you to settle out of court as she had a good chance and if so on what grounds? Sorry for all the questions I'm just wondering if he has been advised he wont stand a chance in court which is why a year since he told me he is ready to go to court he still hasn't took me to court.

@Nicknacky as I said he got his partner to care for her as she use to be a nurse and as she had no previous relationship with my mother it's not like it would have been taking an emotional toll in her the same way it would if you were caring for your own mother as you did. And yes he's made it clear he doesn't give a fuck about me or his nephews. That's all I want aswell money to help do my house up and put it away for my childrens future.

It was just work to her, a couple months work for a huge payout. She certainly wouldn't have been getting that much if she was doing her job.

Your brother was with her, houses her and cared for her when she was close to death. You popped in and visited. It’s quite likely she was happy to change the will in his favour. The fact that you were still considered and left a bequest shows she did think about it and made her choice.

You are so angry about this financial result that you will end up spending what money your father managed to get to reach you, on solicitors.

You have had advice to leave it. You were left some of your mother’s estate. Let it go. You don’t sound sad at her death, just angry at your own perception your brother has got one over on you. You have children - your mother could have thought since he is childless he will have no one to look after him in his old age, whereas he took her in. You come across as grabby, bitter, spiteful, and you are going to end up being taken to the cleaners as a result. You kind of deserve it. Get contesting!

He would still be involved in her care. Hell, I got carers in to do the care I couldn’t! Don’t minimise the emotional impact of having a terminally ill loved one in your house.

So earn your own money for your kids. Don’t rely on a death to do it for you!!

Wow, your last post is heartless.

To be honest you are lucky to have received anything.

Your mum could have left everything to Battersea Dogs Home or another worthwhile cause.

There is no law that dictates where someone should leave their worldly goods to when they die.

Thank goodness.

did your dad leave money to his children but not your half brother? was your mother making that even ?

How is that heartless? It's true. Some funny ways of thinking you have there that you should have got more than your sister but I'm greedy for wanting us all to have a fair share and to provide for my children.

@AndyMurraysCat lol she would never do that she didn't particularly like dogs

Our solicitors advised the cheapest and less destructive way to settle would be outside of court. We were told it could take years to battle it out in court, especially given her allegations. So we agreed to negotiate with her, my Aunty came back that she wanted half of the estate and we said no and gave her a counter offer which we basically said you either accept this or we will see you in court and she accepted. I can't be 100% sure what her solicitors advised but the fact that she accepted our offer makes me think they advised her that she didn't stand a chance. Especially given the fact that we made her a counter offer I think that would have strongly gone in our favour in court.

@AtillatheHun no as I said my dad brought up her child as his own and wanted it to be split equally between all children including the one that wasnt his but very sadly he died first so it passed to her as it was jointly owned and she left it basically all to one with small amounts to the others.

So provide for your children yourself. Don’t wait for people to die to do it. I didn’t deserve more because I’ve got younger children than my sister.

* @Myimaginarycathasfleas the op has already said she was included in the will, just didn't receive the third she was expecting.*

Well that puts a different spin on things and interesting she didn't correct me on my misunderstanding.

This has taken a real turn. How much did you all get OP. You have no proof that he robbed you as you put it, but you think he did. Is it really worth losing what you have. You and your kids will almost certainly end up with nothing and maybe rack up huge debt. You have also lost a relationship with your brother. Your bitterness will eat away at you. Step back come to terms with it and accept what you had.

OP a few points:

1. You can't be "robbed" of something that was never had. The existence of a prior will didn't make that money yours and no Judge will overturn a legal will in favour of a previous one without a very strong case - which you don't appear to have.

It's not just about your family/circumstances - it's about legal precedent. Overturning a legal will creates a minefield with regard to case law - there has to be a highly compelling reason to do so.

People change wills because circumstances change. The fact that a more recent will re-distributes the estate differently will not be relevant to its validity because one beneficiary gets less.

If it was then imagine the ramifications - the first will anyone writes takes precedence over future ones. It's not a legally sustainable precedent to say people can't change their minds.

1. Your whole argument here is essentially "it's not fair". On balance I'd say you are correct morally (though I do think there are valid situations to leave siblings different amounts) BUT the way you articulate this does you no favours (re: only have one child and frankly coming across as very aggressive to people who have been in good faith to help you) and in a legal sense has absolutely no merit.

Wills don't have to be fair. The courts aren't there to hold your mother to account for being a good/bad parent. They uphold the law.

As per my first post - go see a solicitor but please be mindful that they get paid whatever the outcome.

My personal opinion is that in your anger you are failing to assess the very significant risks in embarking on this course of action. Risks not just for yourself but for your children

Ask your solicitor about mediation and a possible route to settlement without going to court.

@sweenytoddrazor yes that is true and that is his fault as money clearly means more to him than family.