To find this inappropriate?

[AmbitiouslyFit]

I changed details as this is outing.

I have a friend (A) who I share secrets with. And a have a friend (B) that works in a department store. I’m not as close to B as I am to A. And A has never spoken to B but has seen her few times. They don’t know each other much at all.

Me and A and B are all of same ethnic origin which isn’t white. So we do things slightly differently.

I was speaking to friend A. And told her that friend B told me she knows one of her friends who is single and looking to find someone to be with. This happened as friend B and I were at a cultural thing which we frequently attend and so were talking about personal things. Friend A doesnt really take part. She told me some details about them and so on. I was interested but hesitant and told her I need time to think about it as was unsure.

Within 3 days, friend A who has never met friend B... goes to the department store where B works, and buys something from it. The store isn’t anything unique and in fact friend A works in a similar shop that sells the same things that she bought from B so she didn’t need to go there. And then proceeds to say hello to B and asks her if she knows someone looking for a relationship and insists on her, telling her that she knows me and so on. Except she was asking for herself not for me.

Friend B tells her about the one she told me about. But is finding this a bit strange as she doesn’t know friend A.. and texts me telling me that friend A passed by and outright asked her to help and so she did.

Friend B expecting that me and friend A speak about it as she knows we are close.

I didn’t tell friend B anything but friend A hasn’t mentioned this and I’m finding her behaviour a bit weird.

I’m just not sure why out of everyone she would go to that specific friend of mine who she hardly knows and go the distance to pretend to buy something just to get there first if you see what I mean..

Or am I overthinking this?

P.S. we really aren’t teenagers even if the behaviour sounds like it! I’m a bit baffled as this is way out of character for A... and I’m here to find out how to approach it!

What?

I found this fairly complicated to understand but yes you are overthinking it

I hope the young man in question doesn't realise that battle lines are being drawn. He'll have a huge opinion of himself!
But all's fair in love! And I guess he'll get a say in it eventually?

I didn't follow any of that.

A wants to meet someone and is coming across as desperate. If you want to meet this man first then just get B to introduce you instead, if you aren't interested then ask B to introduce A (because why not). A's behaviour has been a bit full-on and weird, so I'd be a bit worried she's very lonely if she were my friend, but no point thinking too much more about it because I doubt she meant any harm.

What?..

Have you tried switching off and back on again?

just use fake names next time it's so much easier to understand.

Huh?

B is trying to set you up with someone. You told A about it, then A went out of her way to find B and get set up with the same guy? And A hasn't mentioned a word of this to you, you only know because B told you? Is that right?

Think I got my head around that! So friend B suggested someone for you to connect with, you told friend A and she went directly to B to jump the queue and suggest herself to meet this person instead of you? Very odd, but I’d probably steer clear of engaging in anything there. It’s really not worth it, but in further be more cautious about what you share with A maybe.

*in future 🤦🏻‍♀️

I can't follow properly, so much irrelevant info and not enough relevant

Is it basically that one friend has gone into another friends work and made a nuisance of herself because she is hoping second friend can make introductions to suitable men in your culture and second friend is like WTF?

In which case 2nd friend is right

Can you rewrite with more focus on the cultural issue and less on the shop?

I don't really get what's gone on, as you've said you are of a different culture I'd say you need someone of the same culture to tell you if it's inappropriate , all sounds a bit teenage to me.

So friend B offered to set you up with a single friend of hers. But friend A has now sought out this friend and asked to be introduced to the guy herself?

My brain hurts.....

So, you've a friend trying to set you up with someone and you weren't sure and needed time to think about it. In the mean time she went and asked another friend of yours who she doesn't know if she knew anyone available for this guy ?

Whatever about anything else, who the heck walks into a ship asking random people if they know anyone who is available.

Betty from Sainsbury's offered to set you up with a man. You were umming and ahing over this and discussed it with Alice from Tesco.

Alice then went to Sainsbury's to see Betty and asked Betty to set herself, Alice, up with the bloke not you?

Is that right?

Um sorry. All I can focus on is you're saying you're not teenagers but are acting like even younger kids!

I understand it all (dunno how 🤣) and you sound like a trio of teenagers who need to stop talking about each other and maybe meet up together so that you can all talk to each other.

I feel sorry for the single bloke who has no idea he's become such a target.

Blimey, are you lot not able to read?

OP , I think it's difficult to say, given that I don't know what's the norm in your culture. But I can sat that I think most people I know would be a bit miffed. Especially as A has kept it quiet from you. She could have asked if you were interested and if not, that she was.

Sorry I can't follow this at all. Can you try and explain what happened again or something.

I gave up halfway through

I get it.

Belinda is trying to set you up on a sort of blind date with her friend. You weren't sure, and said you needed a few days to think about it.

You told Anna about it. Anna then went to see Belinda and said "hey, I'm desperate to be set up on a blind date and I hear you know of an eligible bachelor, hook me up with him!"

Yeah it's a bit off.

But is that how things are done in your culture? Like, you've got to be really forward to bag the best catch?

I have to admire A’s chutzpah - maybe she really wants that man!

Susan was going to set the op up with a bloke.

The op told her other mate Fiona about it.

Susan and Fiona don't know each other.

Fiona sought out Susan and asked if she could be set up with the guy instead .

Fiona didn't tell the op about it. Susan did.