To ‘be out’ when the Jehovah’s witnesses come back

[Lauriepop95]

As a background sort of story, I’m a super anxious person, I people please constantly and it is something I’m trying to change in the new year. There was a thread on here a few months ago about times you’ve been too polite to correct someone and therefore ended up with the wrong item (think it was about fish and chips)

Anyway, a month or so ago 2 Jehovah’s witnesses came knocking on my door. I was going out at the time and they could see this, they were really lovely ladies. They said they’ll come back another time and I said yep okay as I was trying to get DD out of the door and all the bags etc

Didn’t think anything of it

Well yesterday I got a knock at the door, it was the two JW. They handed me a leaflet and started explaining it, it was extremely windy and cold and I couldn’t hear what she was saying with the wind so loud. So I said they could come into my hallway. They were there about 10 minutes and I explained I wasn’t religious at all and I wasn’t really interested in learning about it.

They didn’t take no for an answer and started prying as to why I didn’t want to. After a while one of them said they will be in the area on Monday afternoon so will pop back for a longer chat.

I said I’m out Monday and I work 9-5 weekdays so sorry I can’t. She said “well I can come tomorrow evening I suppose! I couldn’t think of an excuse quick enough.

I feel that they wouldn’t take my “not interested” as an answer and I need to be a hell of a lot more assertive. But I really really struggle with this.

My only other option is to go out with DD for the evening (go to my mums or something) but then that’ll only be a temporary fix as they’ll come back another day.

How can I politely buy firmly get them to leave me alone? I have already told them I’m not interested and they are still coming. I feel incredibly uncomfortable at the thought of telling them sternly to leave me alone but I may have to suck it up and do it.

AIBU to just hide if I see them coming?

Anyone have any stories about encounters with JW?

Rescheduling these people (or rather, allowing THEM to re-schedule!) is completely the wrong move. So is any attempt to justify yourself. They clearly lack boundaries and are not even showing basic consideration here.

If you try to justify yourself with pushy people (this isn't just JWs), they see another way in. ("Oh, well if you're out on Wednesday, we could come back on Thursday" etc). Such people completely rely on your failure to say "No."

Bottom line: You are not interested and you don't want them coming back. If you simply hide when they come round (fgs, you're in your own house!), they will simply come back another time.

Firm voice as soon as you answer the door: We are not interested. Shut door straightaway. No ifs, no buts, no "Well, I'm not quite sure but maybe. . . " Once you enter into negotiations with people like this, you are lost.

And absolutely do not apologize!!

Just say: No thank you, I’m not interested in hearing more. Or just don’t answer the door. You are not obliged to talk to them or let them in. They’ll be used to it.

My dad invited htem in for a robust theological debate (he was a churchwarden, and more than knew his shit). Never seen again, I think they blacklisted us themselves.

They dont like snakes btw. I had a knock on the door while carrying my son s boa constrictor from one room to another and we were expecting his equally reptile loving friend so i answered, said we re not interested, they looked terrified and backed away not handing me the leaflet.
Extreme tips for getting rid of unwelcome callers

I do just engage and answer their questions. I've always felt they couldn't get away fast enough!

We used to get them around where we used to live, very persistent you have to be very firm to get rid of them otherwise they will keep returning. I think it is very rude to turn up and not take no for an answer. I finally told them to F off.

Don’t get any around here fortunately

OP Look at this as a good opportunity for a 'Practice run' in being more assertive. It doesnt matter if you fumble and come across rude, because it's likely you'll never see them again, and the worst case scenario is also the best one: They'll go away and not come back!
Then once you've been more assertive in this 'safe' zone (no consequences) you might feel more able to try being more assertive in your day to day life with people you know.
(Personally i think it's more rude to turn up at people's houses trying to convert them but thats just me)

Tell them to sod off! Really irritates the shit out of me people forcing their beliefs on random strangers in their own homes!! 😡😡😡

(I'm not normally quite so aggressive but I'm pregnant, hormonal and irritable!! 😂🙄🤰🏼🤷‍♀️)

I have a lot of time for JWs, actually (not time given out on my doorstep, but in principle). They have several ideas I like. They think it's their duty to try to save others and they discipline themselves to act on that even though they are often shy people who struggle to talk to strangers, too. The ones I have known personally have been nice people.

I hope you can find a way to become more assertive, OP.

I usually go toe to toe with them and try to convert them to veganism. They get right arsey It becomes a sort self righteous duel of twattery.

Tell them you want to go on the 'no knock' list. You don't need to say anything else.

If you really can't face it put a note on your door. For all their (IMHO) faults they do respect the 'do not knock' list. You have to understand that they will keep a record at Kingdom Hall listing your address, but for me that's a price worth paying.

Since I mentioned this to my neighbours only two of them get visits.

Tell them that you have had a blood transfusion and regularly get them for a medical issue
They will run away and never come back

They dont like snakes btw.

they looked terrified and backed away not handing me the leaflet.

You think the whole of the JW community are scared of snakes because the 2 people at your door didn’t?

I had some round and when I told them I wasn’t interested I heard them standing in my garden talking about how if only I had let them talk to me I could have been saved but now I never will be. I was just about to order them from my property when they left.

Personally I think that all door-to-door calls should be banned. That way you would get rid of JW/other religious conversion types, charity chuggers, anything else selling, but you’d also get rid of scammers

Try not to do what my dh does. Lets me answer the door and then shouts "tell them to fuck off" it's mortifying for me but works for a while.

Didn’t like it, that should say.

Just tell them you’re not interested. No need to lie/make up nonsense. Be as determined as they are and close the door repeating ‘No, I am not interested, do not come back’.

I told the last lot here that I thought it was disgusting to try to sell religion at the door like it was fucking tea towels. I loathe people telling me I need saving. Just fuck off.

You don’t need to squirm or lie. I usually smile and say I have no wish to be rude but I am being very firm, my spiritual believes are very personal and deeply held and are not up for discussion. You should add to please have it noted not to call again.

l just don't answer the door. They know l'm in, the car's there and they can see the tv's on from the front door.
You don't have to engage with them. They're intruding on your time and privacy. You don't have to justify not wanting to interact with them.

murasaki When l was doing my O levels (many, many years ago!) one of my subjects was RE.
Some JW's knocked on the door at my parents' house. l answered it. They launched into a spiel about "the gospels". l asked which gospels they were referring to. The synoptic gospels, perhaps? Or the gnostics?
They didn't stay long.

The last time they called round (DH likes to debate so normally chats to them) I told them I’m Wiccan, they’ve not been back

ManonBlackBeak, telling them I am catholic doesn't work! They think it's great that they've found a person of faith! It just encourages them.

Door knock.
Put chain on.
Open door.
"No thanks, please don't call again".
Shut door quickly & firmly.
Enjoy the rest of your evening.

Easy.

Slightly off topic but I was listening to a pod cast by an ex JW. He was telling a story about turning up at a house for a return visit and a couple of Mormons were already in the house.

My carer and I thought this would be a good basis for a board game, JW vs LDS, a bit like monopoly where if you get in to the house you get benefits.

I think JW are covert charity workers. They go around giving people the opportunity to feel witty and smug and provide them with a tale they can embellish tell for years to come and the warm and fuzzy feeling lives on. If it weren’t for them people would have to leave their homes with their snakes and their dogs and their kettles and their satanist attire to seek out these opportunities for themselves. It’s really great work they do. The evidence on this thread alone speaks for itself