@SparkleUK
I'd REALLY consider him asking to be deferred on to the next intake.
Even if they allow him time off for the birth (very unlikely during initial training), they'll make him defer his passing out until later anyway until they do that part of the training for another intake and he can sit in.
Even at best, you have the baby before he starts.
But do you both realise the impact of a new baby AND initial training.
If it's not residents, yes he'll be home every night.
But it's not just sitting in a classroom learning for three months. It's intense.
He has to learn the fundamentals of all the basic offences during that time before he goes out with his tutor for the next stage of his probation. There are so many offences, they'll only spend part of a day, a day or maybe two days on each area.
That means every night, from the minute he gets home, he'll be expected to be revising the next days subject. Learning definitions of offences word for word.
Every week there will be knowledge checks.
He's got an exam at the end of the initial training.
He's got a fitness test at the beginning and again during his defence training week.
He's got boots to shine.
He's got uniform to wash and iron with perfect creases.
He's not going to be able to help you or enjoy his new child one little bit. Baby waking in the night is going to affect him the following day.
And then he goes out after three months with a tutor. Again, he's constantly assessed. He'll have a file to build to evidence his competencies.
He'll be working very long shifts. Night shifts (maybe for the first time?) - are you going to leave the house from 8am to 8pm so he can sleep? If you're not, he's not going to be able to perform at work to the standard they'll be looking for in a probationer.
If they extend his probation because they don't feel he's able to give his all, it'll affect him once goes signed off his probation. Teams talk. Nobody wants someone on their team that got their probation extended or can't stay awake during shifts (yes, I know people in the job for years who have babies and struggle but in a probationer, it's not good at all) because they don't be able to trust him. He is the only thing standing between them being killed or going home to their own families. If he is too tired or distracted, he won't have their backs.
A lot of forces then put their probationers in to their driving course.
Your child will be 4-10 months, depending when born.
That's three weeks of intense revision, exams and driving at VERY high speeds. If he's exhausted then lives are at risks.
If he defers, he can go in to the next intake and give it his all.
But if he goes on to this one and fails it, he's lost his shot at joining.
I'm genuinely not trying to upset you. But you've got to be prepared that this is going to be tough for both of you.
He'll be torn between his dream job and a baby he can't spend the time he wants with.
You'll want to share it all with him and be resentful that he can't help or share any of the precious moments with you.
Go in to this with open eyes.
Because if he doesn't defer, this is going to be a VERY tough few months that you might not be able to emotionally forgive or forget.