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MIL gave DD tea to drink - am I wrong to be cross!

54 replies

fifi20 · 30/08/2007 10:58

MIL came to look after DD for 1 day whilst I was at work (childminder on holiday). I got home to find nappy on back to front, baby sitting in poo, and she told me that she had liked drinking her tea (DD is 9.5 months!) They stayed the weekend, and MIL had cheek to tell me I was a worrier and I should relax and go with the flow. I told her to butt out - but DH thinks I am being unreasonable...whats the opinion out there!!

OP posts:

JeremyVile · 30/08/2007 11:00

If you want her to butt out - stop using her as childcare.


sleepycat · 30/08/2007 11:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:00

Fair point. Thing is she wants to do it. But Im not sure I want her too.

OP posts:

hercules1 · 30/08/2007 11:01

Yanbu about the tea. You need to mazke it clear and if unable to trust her on this one need to dfecide whether you use her agian.


RubySlippers · 30/08/2007 11:02

well she did you a big favour
a slurp of tea won't hurt her, or a back to front nappy


MaryAnnSingleton · 30/08/2007 11:02

no harm done - be grateful that she helped out !


Biglips · 30/08/2007 11:02

hee hee! mum still cant get the nappy on right as its always back to front (My mum doesnt listen!!) and gives her tea too....i wouldnt worry about it but do mention about the nappy though. About the Tea, ive told my mum that i dont any to her but my mum doesnt have her that often (as she works).


RubySlippers · 30/08/2007 11:02

i assume you mean a taste of hers, rather than a whole cup to herself in which case that was out of order


Biglips · 30/08/2007 11:03

my DD is 2.11yrs old


fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:05

Hmm - thanks everyone - I get the message - maybe I do need to chill out! I am a bit of a control freak. Its just my sister looked after her for a whole week and nothing went wrong, the childminder is fab fab fab, so I guess i am a bit spoilt. I think I am compensating for having to go to work & leave her.

OP posts:

ProjectIcarusinhercar · 30/08/2007 11:06

nappy on back to front - who cares.
Dirty nappy - how long do you thinkK? Not great but it happens. Tea - generation thing I think I wouldn't have been happy but I would have asked for it not to happen again.

Worrier - She may be right , just ignore it.


fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:09

Dirty nappy maybe an hour - DD never cries so unless you check or smell you cant tell. I am getting the message from everyone!! My DH was right, as was MIL - I need to chill out!!!

OP posts:

NadineBaggott · 30/08/2007 11:11

telling you to relax sounds like good advice to me!

Disposable nappies would be easy to put on back to front to the uninitiated.
Tea hmm, well maybe not but not the end of the world, no doubt your dd will be helping herself to bit of grass and worms in the not too distant future! Poo? sh!t happens


fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:14

Good perspective Nadine - DD has already eaten grass, sand & leaves. So I guess a little tea won't hurt!!! I feel a bit that I am so silly! But I want everything to be perfect for DD (can you tell I am first time mum!!

OP posts:

NadineBaggott · 30/08/2007 11:17

I was just going ask if dd is your first!
I suppose telling a first time to relax is a bit tactless so I can see why you felt a bit miffed.

Anyway, you feel better now


NadineBaggott · 30/08/2007 11:18

first time mum!


fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:19

Much better thank you!! Think I will phone MIL and apologise! I think am also oversensitive as my mum isnt around - died 10 yrs ago, and I sometimes could really do with her advice. Thank heavens for MN!

OP posts:

Katy44 · 30/08/2007 11:22

How do people put nappies on back to front? I know it happens as my MIL did it (not complaining as she's fantastic) but I thought the pics on the front were there for that reason - so inexperienced first timers like me would know what to do!!


fifi20 · 30/08/2007 11:24

I think it is the terry towelling generation - they didnt have a back & a front

OP posts:

NadineBaggott · 30/08/2007 11:24

but there is a picture on the back too!
I think I did it once!


Katy44 · 30/08/2007 11:32

Ah - not on the tesco ones I use!
They all have an animal on the front in the middle - maybe it should have a speech bubble coming out of its mouth saying "this is the FRONT"
Anyway, she may have done it deliberately to make me laugh - we'd just had a bump in the car and I was upset


fedupwasherwoman · 30/08/2007 11:34

My mum did the back to front nappy thing too.

We laughed big time over "silly Granny"

I don't think there were pictures on early disposables and there certainly weren't with terry nappies.

The poo thing happens, my mum has admitted not changing my niece's nappy (she looks after her more than my ds's) if she knows that my SIL is due to collect her in the next half hour or so but this is partly as SIL tends to breeze in and start reading the newspaper if she can get away with it for half an hour.


gringottsgoblin · 30/08/2007 11:47

nappies are obviously tricky things, i was in hospital with a lady who had to call the mw cos she didnt know what to do as the nappy didnt have sticky bits (didnt realise it was velcro). dh also struggled with nappies at first. the first time he got ds dressed he put his dungarees on back to front aswell. he still has the text i sent him asking if ds dressed himself

yabu to be cross, but yanbu as this is your pfb dd, so apologising is good idea but dont feel too bad!


admylin · 30/08/2007 11:51

I never let my 2 drink tea or coffee but in France I know quite a few parents who gave milky tea to 1 and 2 year old dc.
Maybe your MIL just gave your dc a sip?


ally90 · 30/08/2007 16:22

Back to front dh still gets them on back to front 16 months later...even with a picture at front and plastic sticky tag at the back of them... some people just are not technically minded... bless.

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