To let DS have a Disney Princess party for his 6th birthday

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

Just that really. DS is 6 next month is having a class party. He has asked for a party theme of his favourite film characters...who are all Disney princesses. AIBU to give him the party he wants?

Hmmm, As a mum of boys kids can be very mean and sadly you can guarantee there'll be at least one attendee who will make fun of your son.
How about a general Disney theme with options to include Toy Story characters etc?

I’m as feminist as they come, hate gender stereotypes etc etc, but honestly no I wouldn’t throw a Disney princesses party for a 6 year old boy because some boys will refuse to come (my 5 year old is in a “I hate pink” phase and won’t do anything “girly”), and some boys will tease him for it, and they will all remember it and comment on it for years to come.

Just have a Disney theme.

Why not just a Disney theme - as a little girl I would have hated dressing as a bloody princess. We ladies themed parties that the majority of the kids would enjoy it be able to take part in.

As above, just go with a general Disney theme. Kids en masse tend towards cruel, you should probably also consider whether he wants to dress up as a princess too, and how you might deal wirh potential fall out which could last for years.

In a purely practical sense, the wider the theme, the easier it is to find a costume (if it is a costume party) I’d go for Disney too.

Depends on what you mean by theme. Just plates and cups with pictures on or activities all around it? What are his friends interested in? My 6 year old ds isnt interested in Disney princesses and probably wouldnt have wanted to go (or I'd have kept him home as worried hed get bored and say something....6 years old arent always tactful).

If its generic activities with decorations I wouldnt necessarily notice, especially if looked like wider Disney film with several characters.

Oooh it's a tough one. You don't want to make DS feel he's in the wrong for liking Disney Princesses. But as others have said, children can be mean. Perhaps just dilute with a few other Disney characters.

And no, you shouldn't HAVE to make these adjustments, he should be able to have whatever he wants and be treated just as normally for it, but in the real world you need to be practical and not throw him under a bus that could have been entirely predicted.

Princesses are pretty lame though (sorry if you love them but I never liked the fluffy princesses, and always thought they just needed to ditch the prince/love interest, stop being passive or reliant on the ‘boy’ and have their own adventures).

I agree with LittleDucks that it depends what you mean by a theme. My dd would not have wanted to dress up as a princess for a party but would not think anything at all about a princess cake or plates etc. Most six year olds are very self involved. They won't want to go to a football party if they don't like football whereas older and younger children will give stuff a go.

Does it need to be themed? DD's forthcoming 6th party is just a village hall with inflatable bouncy castle and slide and general girly princess but the helium balloons (so shoot me) and table cloths are Lol Doll as a nod to her favourite thing currently. Can't it just be a party but Disney princess themed tableware etc?
It's a tough one as if you say no you are giving in to the threat of bullying and thus perpetuating and pandering to the toxic masculinity bullshit, yet I agree with PP regarding bullying which can then last for years. It sucks when a girl can throw a Thomas The Tank Engine/Transformers party, choose blue colour schemes etc with no qualms but boys cannot have the party they choose for fear of ridicule and personally I find it adorable when little lads dress in princess dresses play with dolls and prams etc and always think 'he's going to be a good chap when he's older'.
Sorry for the ramble but this dilemma has made me sad on your behalf for how wanky and backwards society is.

Apologies for punctuation etc, I am hoola hoping as I type to rid me of stomache fat

For some reason that makes me happy - the thought of you hula hooping and typing.

All these people saying children can be mean etc need to parent their kids properly and teach them not to be bullies surely children aren't mean parents are and that then projects onto the child teaching them all the wrong things. Let him have whatever theme he wants op

Do a Disney theme so this guests can dress up as the characters they want. No reason why you can’t include the princesses in the decor though.

Ps I would be keen on a girl doing a Disney princess theme either because it’s too limiting for the guests.

In an ideal world, he should have the party theme he wants. Sadly we're not there yet, and pragmatism (for the sake of his welfare) needs to rule here. A general Disney theme is the way to go.

Even if DS was a DD it would be better to just go “Disney” as the theme for a whole class party. Gives parents more options than having to get a princess dress and you’ll find plenty of classmates who would prefer none princesses!

My DS went to plenty of Disney or princesses and superheroes parties. Much more inclusive and easier for everyone.

If your DS likes Disney princesses his classmates probably already know so I wouldn’t worry about that part!

@Lucafritz none of us have any control over how other people parent their children. We are a feminist household. We do not subscribe to gender stereotypes. But I can still make the observation that other families are very much pink for girls/blue for boys and that some of their children absolutely would pick on a boy for wearing a dress.

This is something I really wrestle with internally because my kids are approaching the age where it will come up. On the one hand, I have always - obviously rightly - taught my children that the things they like to do/wear/listen to/watch/read etc are completely unrelated to their sex. It is going to take the rejection of gender stereotypes by adults to eradicate this nonsense. Sadly too many adults are wedded to the idea and busily instilling it into their offspring. The struggle for parents like me comes in when we don't want to encourage gender stereotypes, but similarly don't want to offer our child up as a lone sacrificial lamb to fight the status quo.

I don't know the answer. It's something I ponder on an awful lot.

One bonus to it not being themed is that non-branded party stuff is so much cheaper!

I think it lovely that he likes the princesses, however he is likely to get some issues from the other children. Kids can be so cruel.

You don't need to tell him that he is wrong for liking princesses, you just need to tell him that not many people will have a costume that specific and more people would be able to come if the theme was wider. It's a much more positive (and true) message.

When I was a kid my parents did not buy me costumes especially for parties so I had to make do with things I already had. I might have been able to put together something that resembled any random Disney characters, but would have struggled if I only had a few options.

If it's not a costume party and you're just talking decorations etc then yes I'd just do what he wants, I doubt the kids will particularly care, they'll just be looking for the nearest sweets

Luca meanwhile in the real world, some children will be mean anyway no matter how they are parented.
Although I agree with your sentiment, sadly by having a specifically Disney princess theme party for a 6 year old boy the OP would be setting him up for ridicule, particularly from other boys in the class. Sad, but true.

DD wanted a dress up party for her 5th birthday, I forget what theme she wanted. We explained that not all kids would have dressing up clothes for a theme so we just put dress up in their favourite costume. Parents were so glad as one boy was obsessed with his darth vader mask at that point so would have wanted that regardless of party theme. We ended up with 2 elsas, a police officer, a footballer, a vampire, a Knight. They all had a great time and DD was pleased she had a dressing up party.

I think general disney is a really good compromise - lots of choice particularly now they own Star Wars and Marvel. @Randomlychosenname is right, it’s highly likely his classmates are already aware of his preferences

I do find it sad how parents influence their children and they start parroting the same bs. I was shocked to hear ‘leave that alone it’s for girls’ out of the mouths of a couple of mums I got friendly with at a playgroup. These were the same ones who found my dd’s penchant for princess stuff distasteful and declared they wouldn’t allow their daughters to play with that stuff (whilst dd was playing with blocks and dinosaurs Whilst in a tutu and tiara I might add).

Why can’t kids just like what they like? Our job is to make sure they’re well rounded not to enforce our views on them.

What do you mean by theme?

Princess invitations, plates, games, and party bags are all fine. His party, his choice. If another child hates Princesses so much he doesn't want to attend, who cares.

Princess fancy dress is problematic just because a very specific fancy dress is always problematic. It ties other parents into having to buy a specific costume so I wouldn't do it for any theme.