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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Year in Italy

139 replies

NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:19

If you were mid 40's (OK, late) no children, no mortgage/house as rent, no partner, no significant private pension (just state contributions but have a 'nest' pension which I could contribute to for part of the year, no fixed career but some freelance work and were offered a year in Italy working in an art-based place (excellent international reputation, paid internship about 1200 euro a month) would you be unreasonable to go?

My head says knuckle down here and do the sensible thing. My heart which I have not listened to for a long time says go. Have one last fling with the world before you come back and settle down and do the mortgage/pension/9-5 job thing.

I would get Italian language classes, too. It is in the area of my career and would be very good experience.

I am feeling old, tired and jaded. AIBU to say yes to it?

What would make you say no in my situation?

OP posts:
Northernsoullover · 09/01/2020 21:21

Just do it!

Mummadeeze · 09/01/2020 21:22

Sounds like a great opportunity. I expect most people only dream of having the freedom to do something like this.

soulasylum · 09/01/2020 21:23

Sounds a wonderful opportunity OP!! Grab it with both hands and don't look back. Best of luck to you Flowers

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:23

but...

Had I been more sensible in the past I would be in a better situation now (financially, etc) Perhaps now I should stop the dreams and settle down?

OP posts:
katy1213 · 09/01/2020 21:24

Go for it! I wish I'd been brave enough to do something like this - and who knows what opportunities it will throw up.

Gonegrey31 · 09/01/2020 21:25

Absolutely go for it ! A year is nothing in the grand scheme of things . Get yourself out there , what an opportunity!

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:28

Ah, see now there's 3 of you...and talking my 'seize the day' kind of language.

I think I 've lost my spirit of adventure and become all sensible. Part of me wants to do this to get it back but then another part of me thinks I have just grown up and knocked the nonsense out of me.

(although, personally the nonsense was the best part of me)

It is a completely reputable, recognised internationally internship in Florence. In my field of study.

But I am not the fearless, Kate Adie wannabee that I was in my twenties..

OP posts:
Iambloodystarving · 09/01/2020 21:30

Go. I did it once and it changed my life. Very much for the better.
Seriously - GO!
God I wish I was you! Smile

WindyMiller1020 · 09/01/2020 21:30

Definitely go for it! You still have 20+ years of working so loads of time to sort a pension out.

If you want to really knuckle down when you get back you could apply for civil service/NHS and hammer the pension contributions as much as you can

TooMuchBloodyChoice · 09/01/2020 21:31

Just do it.

Look at it this way - if you go and don’t like it you can come home. But if you don’t go you may always regret it.

You can be financially sensible on your return - it is only 12 months!

Jupiters · 09/01/2020 21:32

Sounds amazing! I'd be accepting and booking flights so quickly they wouldn't know what happened.
I say this as someone with a very sensible job with a very good pension, but is so bored with their life!

ArkAtEee · 09/01/2020 21:32

Go for it! I'm jealous Grin

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:32

@katy1213 that's what I was thinking. Certainly pre-Brexit it would have served me well on return for a job in the field in London or perhaps a PhD place, but now I am not so sure.

If you could study anywhere in Europe where would you go?

OP posts:
SleepDeprivedElf · 09/01/2020 21:33

Good God of course, just go for it. Congratulations!!

PooWillyBumBum · 09/01/2020 21:35

I’m 29 and our savings rate is 43%. Checking our pension and investments accounts daily is what gets me excited. I rotate my clothing every 3 months to keep a capsule wardrobe. I have a meal planning spreadsheet. I’m boring and super sensible.

And I say bloody go!

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:36

@WindyMiller1020 yes, that's the plan at the moment now. So, a year won't make that much difference in theory - but it will make it all the harder to settle down into routine afterwards.

I have really lost my mojo

OP posts:
BabbleBee · 09/01/2020 21:37

Bollocks to sensible! Take the chance, the opportunity and anything else coming your way and run. If I could do anything remotely similar I’d be out of here like a shot.

bridgetreilly · 09/01/2020 21:37

I can't think why you wouldn't, honestly. But if you decide not to go, I'll take it!

poppycity · 09/01/2020 21:37

Absolutely go for it. It's one year. Can you get a leave of absence so you have work to return to?

Notthetoothfairy · 09/01/2020 21:38

Another vote for do it!

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:38

@PooWillyBumBum but you are who I secretly try to be. Organised, efficient with time, interested and committed to staying in control of things. Instead, I am the opposite.

OP posts:
loutypips · 09/01/2020 21:38

Do it. Chances like this are few and far between, it sounds perfect.

Lyzat · 09/01/2020 21:39

Omg you have to go.

BeardofZeus · 09/01/2020 21:40

I lived in Italy for a year, in Emilia-Romagna and it was a bit of a shock to start off with ... the pace - it’s so slow! But being able to exist in such a country, with the food and the people and the wine and the countryside and the history and the travelling... you get my drift I think??? Grin

Also Italian is such a fun language, so expressive and completely sounded so no silent s’s to worry about!

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:41

I have a small amount of freelance work that I can keep up with whilst I am there. Paid internship so would have to get some savings before I go. Debts will not go away that quickly but am on top of them and are manageable.

Think I am scared. I have worked hard to tame my inner spirit and may have accidentally suffocated her in th eprocess. If she smells the sense of adventure, open toad, sunshine and la dolce vita, I don't know what she will do...

OP posts: