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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Year in Italy

139 replies

NewYearsRevolution2020 · 09/01/2020 21:19

If you were mid 40's (OK, late) no children, no mortgage/house as rent, no partner, no significant private pension (just state contributions but have a 'nest' pension which I could contribute to for part of the year, no fixed career but some freelance work and were offered a year in Italy working in an art-based place (excellent international reputation, paid internship about 1200 euro a month) would you be unreasonable to go?

My head says knuckle down here and do the sensible thing. My heart which I have not listened to for a long time says go. Have one last fling with the world before you come back and settle down and do the mortgage/pension/9-5 job thing.

I would get Italian language classes, too. It is in the area of my career and would be very good experience.

I am feeling old, tired and jaded. AIBU to say yes to it?

What would make you say no in my situation?

OP posts:
stopchewingeverything · 10/01/2020 01:26

OMG....definitely definitely go! What's the worst that could happen? You don't like it and you come back early. It could open up so many opportunities for work, friendships, travel and culture. Please let us know what you decide!

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 01:30

@stopchewingeverything I'll have to, won't I?!

OP posts:
LordBuckley · 10/01/2020 04:22

Do it, you won't regret it.

I moved to Italy in my early 30s, and I'm still here nearly 40 years later...

Newname1978 · 10/01/2020 04:28

Oh my God go. You want to go so go. Amazing. And let us know how you're getting on.

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 04:41

I have been looking at accommodation that the institution provides. Its a kind of halls of residence type thing, walking distance from the site I would be working at and costs 500 euro a month all in. Which leaves me 700 euro living expenses. If I topped it up to 900 euro a month, think that is more than enough (not including travel, and hotel stays in visiting places).

Have also been looking at pictures of Florence and surrounding areas. It is beautiful. I want sun on an unconditional basis; the certainty of it throughout the spring and summer. Am do fed up with our weather.

OP posts:
Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 04:41

so fed up

OP posts:
Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 04:42

@LordBuckley whereabouts, if I can ask?

How did you find it when you first went there?

OP posts:
Fruityb · 10/01/2020 06:17

It’s in Florence?? Go yesterday!! It’s an amazing place and one year won’t hurt!

SinkGirl · 10/01/2020 06:48

I so wish I could do something like this. When I got pregnant I had ideas of living in Italy or France before the baby started school as DH can work from anywhere. Then it ended up being twins, and then they were both diagnosed with disabilities - we really can’t go anywhere, so here we are.

If I were in your position I would bite their hand off. Florence is one of my favourite places on earth, just do it.

I had an opportunity to travel doing a very fun job when I graduated but I passed it up for stupid reasons and have always regretted it.

kirstinm · 10/01/2020 07:26

As someone who is in the arts I would bite their hand off for this opportunity! I'm sure you know that for so many people in this area a paid internship like that will never come up...I'm jealous just thinking about it. Please take it!

makingmammaries · 10/01/2020 07:31

It would get you an Italian residence permit, which comes with Schengen rights.

RuggerHug · 10/01/2020 07:51

Do it!!! Honestly OP, How often do these opportunities come up? Grab it by both hands and enjoy itGrin

Luaa · 10/01/2020 08:41

I wouldn't even think about it, I'd just go! Maybe if you stay you'll be in a better position in a few years than if you go, maybe the opposite would be true. But I'd rather not live with the regret of not going.

LordBuckley · 10/01/2020 14:32

I moved to Milan, having previously done a short Italian course, but I didn't really speak much Italian when I arrived. It didn't take long to improve it, though.

I started off teaching English until I built up enough clients to work full-time as a freelance translator.

There's lots going on in the big cities like Milan; I personally prefer the countryside, but you're better off in a city to begin with while you get to know people.

I did find it took a while to make friends, because a lot of Italians tend to stick with the friendship groups they grew up with, but if you're working in an office with other people that shouldn't be a problem.

You'll probably find the red tape frustrating to begin with, but you soon get used to it.

I've no idea how things are going to work with Brexit after the end of the month; there's a kind of transition period until the end of the year, so I don't think you should have any difficulties, but you'd better check it out.

You're welcome to send me a PM if you need any more information.

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 16:54

@LordBuckley thanks Lord, I may take you up on that at a later stage. Much appreciated.

I have dual citizenship with an EU country so have an EU passport. From what I know, everything is pretty much organised by them in terms of the paperwork which certainly makes it easier especially in a place like Italy. There would be a group of international interns starting with me so I guess they become your social group and then you slowly get to know local people.

OP posts:
CheshireDing · 10/01/2020 16:55

Why would you not go ?🤷‍♀️

Book that ticket OP 😀

Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 16:55

@Luaa that was always my philosophy - that you can't really measure these things in a way that fits in with mortgage/job/pension so don't even try.

I must have got really sensible over the years without realising.

OP posts:
Original poster
NewYearsRevolution2020 · 10/01/2020 16:58

@LordBuckley and the language, from what I have looked at, seems doable (esp with the bit of French and Spanish that I have).

I am determined to learn fluently another language. That really is a skill.

OP posts:
MilkTray22 · 11/01/2020 20:08

So are you going to go?!

DjMomo · 11/01/2020 20:10

Go go go!

Newkitchen123 · 11/01/2020 20:13

Get gone

LordBuckley · 11/01/2020 21:43

Yes, the language should be doable.

I'd been living in France for a couple of years before I moved to Italy, so my French was already pretty good, and the basic grammatical structure of Italian is very similar.

I lived just across the border from Geneva, which you mentioned; that's also a nice city, but can get a bit boring after a while.

I picked up Italian quite quickly because the only person I knew when I arrived was my Italian boyfriend; I didn't know any English-speaking people there at all, so I was speaking Italian all the time, except when I was teaching.

FindMeInTheSunshine · 11/01/2020 21:55

Please, please go, and keep us updated! Life is short and this sounds like such a wonderful opportunity. Slightly morbid, but would you rather look back during your last days on extra year working in a civil service job, or a year in Florence?!

Hefzi · 11/01/2020 21:56

Go. You never know- it might open other doors (is it at EUI? Though it might be outing, I appreciate)

I'm a similar age and financial situation, and I would jump at the chance (sadly am a wage slave with no freelance opportunities!)

midnightmisssuki · 11/01/2020 21:59

Go!

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