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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel like a teenager in my 40s

37 replies

Orangeblossom78 · 07/01/2020 10:05

I hear the perimenopause can also be called 'middlescence'- a bit like a second adolescence. It certainly feels like it to me.

I am listening to Billie Eilish and feeling like I hate everyone. Increasingly moody and selfish also. AIBU or is anyone else going through this also?
What kind of new things do you find yourself doing?

OP posts:
Inappropriatefemale · 07/01/2020 19:35

I love Billie Eilish and I’m 38, am I too old to listen to her?!Confused I’m in the perimenopause too and do feel like I’m reverting to 19 again..how I wish I was 19Smile

EscapeTheCastle · 07/01/2020 19:44

yup, I hear you!

ThebishopofBanterbury · 07/01/2020 19:49

Yep I know what you mean op! I'm 41 and want to have as much fun/look as I can before the menopause! Tricky with young kids but I'm making it my mission to feel as young as poss.

belay · 07/01/2020 20:16

I have become moody and selfish in that I just want to be on my own most of the time. People make me feel irritated

Inappropriatefemale · 07/01/2020 20:18

Same Belay in that I’m getting less sociable just now and I can’t be arssed with friends Sad

JustDanceAddict · 07/01/2020 20:18

I’ve got spots 😆

yearinyearout · 07/01/2020 20:27

Well I'm with you on Billy Eilish, hating everyone, being in a foul mood, but I'm not having any fun bits!

chickedeee · 07/01/2020 21:32

Yep agree with hating everyone and so done with the parenting thing (my poor kids ☹️.

Eldest is a teenager and going through the reverse of me and yet symptoms are the same 🤣

Worried there is not much time left and effect my behaviour may have on children 😳

Poor women 😂

EvaHarknessRose · 07/01/2020 21:37

Ooh yes late thirties I went through this.

Elieza · 07/01/2020 22:01

I have less patience. Way less! But not crabbit. Yet!

Teenagemaw · 07/01/2020 22:03

Ahhh thats what up with me then too.. thanks OP

whiteroseredrose · 07/01/2020 22:05

I'm now post menopausal but definitely went through a 'phase' about 10 years ago. Never thought about it but it must have been the start of hormones. The warning before the heat started !

StormyLovesOdd · 07/01/2020 22:56

Me too, I have no patience and feel constantly irritated with everyone, especially DH

How long does this last?

Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 08:59

I'm not sure how long it lasts.

DH told me to take off my headphones and try and join in with the family yesterday after dinner. I guess I should as we are trying to have the DC have screen free time after dinner and I am not joining in.

OP posts:
Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:01

The Cambridge dictionary says it lasts from ages 40-60

dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/middlescence

OP posts:
Robstersgirl · 09/01/2020 09:03

I’m 40 and was in the mosh pit for Billie Eilish at Reading last year. Largest crowd Readings ever seen apparently. It was amazing! Feel young always.

Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:05

I feel like I an grieving my younger life before DC and also not my DC are teens, their younger selves as well. But I feel a bit silly being like this also. I don't feel inside much different as I did in my teens / 20s, unsure of where to go next. DH is now early 50s.

I am doing some sports classes like zumba and aqua, seeing the range of women there from retired to young...in an odd way I like doing stuff where there is a range of people there. Not all mums either after spending years in the playground. I am so bored with 'mum- chat' and have no patience for any of it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:05

Also grieving early days as a couple and wondering if we can even get that back.

OP posts:
Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:07

Also sorry if I made it seems as if 40s is too 'old' to listen to come music, it isn't! It is just how I felt a bit. My DC were teasing me a little you see!

OP posts:
Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:09

Worried there is not much time left and effect my behaviour may have on children

I was thinking this also, but I was reading this book I had since they were babies called "letting go as children grow" and it was saying about it being better in a way when parents dan't always constantly focus on them and let them be a bit. Especially teens.

OP posts:
cookiemon666 · 09/01/2020 09:11

I am 46 and am definately a grumpy old women at times, but can also be found moshing in the kitchen!!

Isthisridix · 09/01/2020 09:12

Me too. Late 30s, marriage breakdown, had a boob job, became obsessed with exercise and found new love. Everyone thinks I’m having a midlife crisis Blush

Original poster
Orangeblossom78 · 09/01/2020 09:18

I just got a fitbit it's so dinky!

OP posts:
Karenisbaren · 09/01/2020 09:31

I am almost a year into not having red flag week, I am finding myself getting very hot especially when I go into shops, at times I could quite happily rip my partners head off, some days I despise him. I feel like I am in a constant fog and my skin is dry. I actually cannot remeber the last time I felt happy and cant wait for al this to be over the only good bit is not having red flag week after a few years of constantly having it and not having a break.

Inappropriatefemale · 10/01/2020 01:32

I want a boob job and it’s getting saved up for atmGrin