People who say they are fat when they're not

[lcyb]

Has anyone else seen this on social media - somebody takes selfie showing their body with caption such as "time to get rid of this belly" or something along the lines of.

Somebody I follow has just done this, except she's not fat at all, the very opposite. She actually had lipo and other work done to her body and everyone always comments about how amazing she looks. She's actually paid thousands of pounds to look skinny.

Why do people do this? Is it an attention thing?

People often measure others against themselves, so people that are smaller aren't fat to them and vice versa. If you are bigger than she is then you can't see what fat she is talking about, however someone smaller/skinnier than her is less likely to say this. Plus lots of people may look okay in clothes but less so in underwear or swimwear.

People see themselves differently. I'm a healthy weight, fairly middle of the road ideal bmi. I still have more of a gut than I'd like though and tend to wear high waisted clothes to accommodate. Unless the person you saw is a fitness model with 10% body fat or someone severely medically underweight, then sure they probably do want to work on their fitness. Being "not-fat" doesnt make someone the peak of fitness and body proportion, especially not to their own eye.

It's an Instagram classic. 'I wasn't going to post this picture' followed by some guff about flaws, strength, battle scars and pride.

And picture of apparent perfection.

Cue hundreds of gushing twats rushing forwards with reassurance that said hun is 'hot af', killing it, kicking ass, smoking, and all manner of cringy expressions nicked from their teenage daughters.

It's the white leather trainer brigade, natch. Old enough to know better.

They are just fishing for compliments to validate their existence.
More to the point, why do so many normal people keep showing the world revealing pictures of themselves to the public at large? It baffles me. They either copy celebrities in some sort of herd mentality, or they truly believe they look amazing and the world has nothing better to do than to admire them or they are so insecure that they are constantly looking for validation from strangers (and friends, acquaintances) and are prepared to actually believe when they are ‘admired’ for their (often filtered) pictures or what else?? Apart from the person in the picture, nobody actually cares what they look like.
I really don’t get it. I’m very happy with the way I look but I wouldn’t in a million years go to work or walk up the street in my bikinis to show my body to strangers. I wouldn’t have done it in my 20s either. Putting such pictures on social media exposes you to, potentially, millions of strangers. Why subject them to your picture and why beg for attention like this, what does it actually achieve?

It's attention seeking for ' likes '
My sister in law is skinny but was always going on about being fat until one day when she started again and I snapped ' well go on a bloody diet then and stop moaning '.
She's never mentioned it since.

I think they're fishing for compliments too; I suspect they would never say it again if you agreed with them.

More to the point, why do so many normal people keep showing the world revealing pictures of themselves to the public at large? It baffles me. They either copy celebrities in some sort of herd mentality, or they truly believe they look amazing and the world has nothing better to do than to admire them or they are so insecure that they are constantly looking for validation from strangers (and friends, acquaintances) and are prepared to actually believe when they are ‘admired’ for their (often filtered) pictures or what else?? Apart from the person in the picture, nobody actually cares what they look like.

Yes but look at the way so many kids are being raised by parents who constantly splash their pics over social media.

Some kids can't get through a first day at school, a birthday or even christmas without having a camera shoved in their face.

Then the parents put those pics all over FB and Instagram for the likes and lovehearts, whilst telling their kids 'looks don't matter'.

It's bullshit and very confusing for kids/teens/young adults.

I'm not fat but due to the eating disorder I have that is always there even when I am doing well I always say I am. I look in the mirror and see a fat person looking back at me. It doesn't matter how many people tell me I look good and I'm not fat it doesn't stop me.

I don’t take photos of myself saying I’m fat and need to lose weight but I do say on a daily basis that I want to lose weight. I feel fat have anorexia and bulimia but objectively I’m not fat. I’m a size 8. I don’t say it to get attention it’s just how I really feel.

The next day there is usually a post showing off that she can fit into her 11 year old daughters clothes. Think she needs a hobby seriously.

Parenting properly would be a suggestion. How the hell does the 11 yo DD feel about that?

Face book is full of insecure people. Attention seekers especially. I have no time for them.

It's an attention/humble brag for many, a sign of a problem for a few & a bold declaration for a fairly brave minority.

I am trying to lose 4st & no way will I be announcing anything to Instagram.

I understand it's all relative but I do feel that weight is the one area of life that it's somehow considered ok to moan about without any consideration for the effect you might be having on other people. I'm a size 18 and wouldn't dream of going on about how huge I feel in front of my colleague who's a 22. But slim people do it to me all the time. It's insensitive.

That poor kid @nomorepies

Saying that it's "time to get rid of this belly" doesn't mean she thinks she's fat.

Often the Christmas belly isn't going to be real weight gain, it's just the person is bloated, sluggish and feels like crap so they need to get back to eating healthily and exercising.

It's the white leather trainer brigade, natch. Old enough to know better.

Eh? 🤣 what's wrong with white leather trainers. I've a pair, amongst many other pairs in different colours. Is there some form of secret white trainer club I've inadvertently joined?

AltogetherAndrews has a good point, sometimes people feel fat, but may not be technically overweight, because they have been in the past.

I used to be obese, I'm a size 10 now and have been for years but I genuinely still 'feel' like a bigger person. I feel like I take up a lot of room, that my saggy tummy is obvious and makes me look pregnant, etc.

I think it depends on your build. I'm just under 5foot 4 and have put on weight over Christmas so I'm 10 stones. I look chunky and feel fat, but I wouldn't post on social media about it.

Social media is 90% attention seeking and 10% photo-shopping. Unless you know this woman in real life you don't know what she really looks like.

Sorry Bluntness, I'm sure your trainers are ace, I used it as a shorthand.

I'm in my forties so the fashion accounts on Instagram aimed at me consist of humble bragging women who routinely 'rock' the following:

A bold red lip
Bowie lightning bolts
Shapeless midi dresses/skirts
Biker jackets
Handbags with sequins on
Words and slogans often involving 'rock', 'life', 'dream' etc
Ankle boots
White chunky trainers, extra points if leather

I may own three items or more from this list :)

I had a friend - slim and athletic- utterly perfect- who would constantly tell everyone how fat they were. Every conversation would somehow turn into their supposed obesity (if you could hear but not see you would think she was close to bedbound by her terrible weight problem). I just confirmed it.... I said oh yes.....and oh my how pissed off she was.
I know many will say I may have caused an eating dilemma...but this was someone who was purely fishing for compliments and when she didn't receive them was not a happy camper.
Strangely she stopped telling me about her terrible weight problems...

I feel a bit fat now, although by most people's standards I probably appear very slim and athletic. The only people I would admit this to is my husband and some members of my gym who are of a similar build. Otherwise, I keep my mouth firmly shut.

Apart from MN and a gym Whatsapp group, I don't do social media.