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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I miss my Mum so much and I miss home

57 replies

Rugbyonthebeach · 06/01/2020 05:55

Christmas holidays and it's just hard. I really miss her. It's been a long time since she died but sometimes...oh my goodness is it hard.

It sounds peculiar but I just wanted to write a thread to remember her aloud, kind of. She was so wonderful and kind and loved me so much. I felt so special, like I was smart and talented and had a lot to offer the world. She just really believed I had all these good qualities.

She was an amazing writer. So much fun to be with. She was a dear friend to a wide circle, because she was so kind and helpful, but also loved to laugh.

I have moved halfway across the world and I miss her, and the home we had together. I just had to say it somewhere other than my own head.

To my Mum, I will love you forever..

OP posts:

Original poster

Rugbyonthebeach · 06/01/2020 05:56

Oh I didn't mean to turn on the vote option, I just needed to talk.

OP posts:

SplendidDaysInTheGarden · 06/01/2020 06:01

That was beautiful.

WhatshouldIdo123 · 06/01/2020 06:05

Sending you a tight hug. Losing a much loved parent is so very hard. I still miss my beloved dad, taken way to soon many years ago. It had an everlasting impact on my life
for you

dinodiva · 06/01/2020 06:07

Oh Rugby that’s really lovely. I’m so sorry for your loss.

And I get it, I lost my Mum in October and I miss her terribly. It may sound daft, but I write her letters. What I really miss is all the things I would have told her, so I write them down.

Silvercatowner · 06/01/2020 06:07

I'm so sorry you are finding things hard. Much love.

Lou670 · 06/01/2020 06:09

It's completely normal, especially over the holiday season. My dad died 10 years ago and there is not a single day that I do not think of him. Your mum would want you go on and would be proud of your good qualities that she has instilled in to you. She will always be in your memories.

Grief is so hard and can hit us some days more than others. Keep talking as I find it comforting to keep the memories alive and remember all of the happy times.

This week (Wednesday) I am having one of my dogs put to sleep. He is a rescue and is 11. I have had him for 9 years. I am devastated as I feel I am losing my best friend. I was prepared for this though and we have had an extra year with him that we did not expect. I have had a paw casting of him done and taken a million photos over this last year.

Didn't mean to hijack your post. Just saying how I am going to deal with it. Grief takes time to get over.

Your mum will always be there in your head and it is lovely that you remember her so fondly. Sending you a virtual hug xxx

maras2 · 06/01/2020 06:09

I hear you rugby
My parents have been dead for many years,
Father 1974 and mum in 2001.
Not a day passes without me thinking about them, missing them but it becomes easier over time and fortunately DH knew them both and we can talk about them fondly without me getting upset.
for you. Mx.

Rosehip10 · 06/01/2020 06:19

Best wishes OP

CeciliaMcFlange · 06/01/2020 06:29

I'm sorry you are sad op, but what a beautiful tribute to your mum. If we could all have relationships with our children like you had with your lovely mum how lucky we would be.

Lots of love and to you.

Serin · 06/01/2020 06:31

Your mum doesn't sound like the lying type to me!
If she believed you are smart and talented then you clearly are.

Foreverlexicon · 06/01/2020 06:33

I’m with you.

My mum died over 5 years ago and I got really low around her anniversary this year. My gf went ‘home’ for Christmas this year and it struck me how much I miss having a ‘home’ to go back to. I don’t think it ever gets easier, you just get used to living with it.

DuggeesWoggle · 06/01/2020 06:35

Your mum sounds wonderful experience, just the sort of mum I could only hope to be. I can't imagine how hard it must be to lose her.

DuggeesWoggle · 06/01/2020 06:36

So sorry I don't know why my phone inserted the word experience

thickwoollytights · 06/01/2020 06:38

Mum passed in 2016 but I still think 'oh I'll tell Mum' .....so I do. But it's not the same as sitting with her. And talking.

sandybanana · 06/01/2020 06:43

❤️

MelroseHigginbottom · 06/01/2020 06:48

LadyEggs · 06/01/2020 06:52

I miss my mum too Rugby. She was also kind and beautiful in my eyes Big hand hold here x

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 06/01/2020 06:53

Your mum’s love for you is forever ❤️

Monty27 · 06/01/2020 06:56

That's a beautiful accolade to your mum OP. I hope in the spiritual world she hears you and can put you at peace

Onceuponatimethen · 06/01/2020 07:02

I’m sorry you lost your lovely mum op. Sending you an un MN hug

eaglejulesk · 06/01/2020 07:03

Hugs to you.

SpeckledyHen · 06/01/2020 07:03

30 years and 3 days on and I still feel as you do OP xx

GeistohneGrenzen · 06/01/2020 07:14

What a lovely tribute, Rugby. My own mother died thirty years ago but on her birthday and mine, and on every anniversary of her death, I find myself thinking of her kindness and patience and I find myself saying 'thank you, mum, I love you'.

Smelborp · 06/01/2020 07:16

I got a sense of a wonderful loving woman, you write beautifully too.

Happyandglorious · 06/01/2020 07:18

So sorry OP.
I am with you and miss mine every day.
Try and feel glad that you had a great mum even if she was taken too soon.
So many people (esp on mn) don't even have a decent mother and honestly I think that's worse.
Remember all the lovely things about her and maybe be in touch with some of her old friends.
It just hurts to need them and not have them. I am so sorry for all us missing someone special and sending love

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