To wonder how you would give DC the best life ever if money was no object?

[Ifimnottheone]

Before anyone says anything, this is of course not saying that money buys happiness, of course not. This is assuming that the child has a loving family, etc.

So, if you had unlimited amounts if money, how would you give your children the best life ever.

My list would be:

1. The best education money could buy.
2. Access to whatever extra-curricular activities/tutoring they desired.
3. A spacious, comfortable house with their own bedroom.
4. Regular travelling
5. Days out

Am I missing anything?

The best education for your child may having nothing to do with money buying it.

I don't think to get what you desire ie activities is that good either, it could easily end up with someone who never sticks at anything.

Even when money is no object I think it's love, acceptance and enough support that makes a happy adult. Having something to strive in some way is very important.

Definitely not "of course" private education - I say that as someone who went to both independent and state schools. Although it definitely depends on the schools available to you.

I have been considering an independent school for DD. It would mean her boarding as I can't move DS2 and no amount of money could mean we could move DS2. So, I'm probably going to leave her where she is because her state school is the best school available.

@Breckenridged Most would give their right to be a financially comfortable SAHP. Enjoy it. They don't stay DC for long.

of course private education

No "of course" about it, it would be an option but right now they're happy where they are, private education isn't essential.

No "of course" about it, it would be an option but right now they're happy where they are, private education isn't essential.

It depends if you are in the right catchment for an excellent the state school or not. But for us - being in an area where the good schools are heavily oversubscribed and the bad schools have availability, as well as the significantly smaller class sizes and ability to fire poorly performing teachers in a private school would make private schools a definite!

If I lived beside a small school with a community feel,, with outside playing fiends, and performed well for rich and poor alike, then obviously private school would not be a priority.

You'll want private education when you are rich enough to jet off wherever you like. Horrid having to be tied to state school holidays.

From that list I think my dc get a good balance tbh... I wouldn’t change schools (there’s no private primary schools in my area anyway) and I went to private and I don’t think my dc are getting any worse than what I did. They get extra curricular activities but I don’t want to make them too busy, right now they get
Dd- Gymnastics’s, swimming, surfing (with dh) and Camogie
DS- swimming, surfing and hurling.

We have just built a new house so I would’nt be moving for love or money 🤣

I would definitely travel more and further afield...but they get a holiday each year

Days out- we are constantly out and about

I don’t think I would change much to be honest. I save for them already so I would probably save more for them and toy with the idea of private secondary school if there was one nearby, but I wouldn’t want them boarding.

I would also choose to live in a different country and somewhere where it is safe for my children to roam and play outside independently. They don’t know anything other than constant adult supervision which must be absolutely stifling and they miss out so much in terms of making up their own play and resolving their own differences. Being ‘free’ to play surrounded by nature, living beside friends, not being bound to a clock, in a safe environment would be invaluable to their physical, emotional and mental well being.

As others have said: a housekeeper to clean and organise to free me up to spend time with them.
A chef to cook healthy food.
Someone to be available late notice to move in and look after the animals if we wanted to suddenly go away.
A gardener.

Rather than private school i’d like to support the state schools they will be going to to give a really good education. So: an extra TA per class (not just their own classes). More teachers. Increased food budget for properly healthy food and lots of it not the stuff they get fed at the moment.
Funding for top in-school and after school activities - good sports, art and music teachers to give lessons to everyone who wants them. Eg pony riding for the whole class. I think they’d get so much more enjoyment out of doing it with their friends rather than (eg) owning their own pony.

Different holidays - where we could afford to pay for good sports tuition and private activities like boat trips.

Rooms with 2 beds in so we could choose to sleep in the same room as them if they were ever upset and needed it.

I'd buy a house outright so no worries about instability then I'd aim for as normal an upbringing as possible for the area I was in. I would limit the family income to an average income and expect my child to do earn pocket money by doing chores like most children do.

Set up pension schemes for them so that they already have a reasonable pension fund by the time they are 18.

A house big enough for us, with a big garden with lots of outdoor activities. A housekeeper/cleaner/cook.
Private healthcare.
Private education, largely at home.
Lots of educational days out/travel.
Any extra curricular activities they'd like.
Lots of quality time.
Work 1 day a week for me and oh.

1. Travel
2. Lots of animals
3. Lots of siblings
4. Space, freedom and individual attention
5. An education tailored to each child's needs and interests
6. Lots of free time with friends
7. The opportunity to pursue any interest regardless of cost, location etc
8. Money for a house

All completely achievable

Buy a flat for them and rent it out. So they have a property for when they are grown.

Funding for top in-school and after school activities - good sports, art and music teachers to give lessons to everyone who wants them.

Newmum - would you provide this for the whole school or just your children’s year? Would you go on providing it after your dc had left the school?

I would get an occupational therapy sensory assessment for my dd. I'd homeschool her, or find/fund a good school for academic autistic children. I'd build her a sensory room at home.

I'd give up work so she doesn't have to deal with childcare. I pay for therapy/counselling to help her with her autism related anxiety.

My kids have a pretty charmed life and most of the above, but I had always imagined we'd take a year off school/work and travel/tutor the kids for a year. Alas, it did not happen and now we're in A-levels and GCSEs.

If money was no object I’d hone educate them- live in a big house in the countryside with lots of siblings and shelter them from social media.

I’d teach them to create, grow, play, free from the commercialism of the outside world.

It’s interesting that some pps have listed access to arts and culture. I think the arts is already accessible on a budget

More space in the home - own bedrooms etc
More travel abroad

One parent always at home in the school /early years
A warm home, decent food, parents who listen to the child

A house deposit if possible

OP- thank you for posing such a thought-provoking question.

If money was no option:

-travel to interesting remote places
-excellent private schooling
-one or both parents working part time
-money to buy them houses (but I wouldn’t tell them until they are adults)
-potentially initial financial support if they choose a very low paying career that they are passionate about, i.e. arts-based careers and internships

I wouid have got a puppy when the DC were much younger (on the basis that I could employ a dog-sitting housekeeper)

Because without an extra pair of hands, it's a seriously tough thing to do until DC are well into the primary years and can be trusted behave

And if really wealthy, then ponies too

And a couple of rescue cats

Ah yes, we’d have pets. We currently don’t as can’t afford walkers, sitters etc and house a bit small (id want a mud room if we had a dog).

I think the best thing you can give your child is your time. And to genuinely like as well as love them.