AIBU to ask for ways to stop colleague bloody coughing!!!! (lighthearted!!)

[Blobby10]

First day back at work after break since 20th December - only 2 of us on this floor of offices - offices next door to each other with doors open but not much soundproofing with doors shut so not an option.

Colleague has come back to work with a cough - he feels fine but has a REALLY REALLY REALLY IRRITATING cough - dry, tickly etc. Every couple of minutes he's effing coughing and after 7 hours of it I'm getting rather grumpy. Add to that my own throat has decided it also wants to cough when he isn't and my head is splitting after a night of no sleep due to a case of "I-don't-want-to-go-back-to-work-itis" I need some lighthearted tips on how to stop him coughing.

Kill him

Give him some really dark chocolate- it’s a natural antitussive

I am the cougher in this instance.

I will willingly accept a blow to head with a blunt instrument because I am majorly pissing myself off, so I can only imagine what its doing to you.

I'm with Buzz, I can't stop coughing and it's doing my head in. I'd happily be put out of my misery.

I am also the cougher and dreading going into the office tomorrow as I fear I will be murdered. After a week of it my Dh has given up and taken dd to his mums to have a break from it! Please pass on any tips!

If you mean me, I'm sorry. Please just kill me. Its awful.

Halls soothers and hot lemon and honey might help? You could both set up a little cough station.

No but I need this for my kids. It's constant and all night and it is driving me to distraction!

We have a colleague who started coughing in September and hasn't stopped yet

And hasn't been to the gp

We have had a person in our office coughing since around mid October and I am ready to kill. Problem is it is little coughs every 30 seconds and they do nothing to alleviate it like sip water etc. Plus they don't cough at all when talking. I am dreading going back to work

Does he wear a tie? Can you strangle him until he's dead with it?

Reminded me of this...

Boiled sweets

Or kill him.

So sorry you are all suffering . Hope you start to feel better soon - we need some crisp cold weather rather than the damp stuff we've had for the past couple of months. I'm sure it does none of us any good but viruses seem to love it.

Like Nootka's colleague mine doesn't seem to want to alleviate the cough by sipping water! I like the idea of bopping him over the head but that might be awkward to explain to the boss . He's gone downstairs now so I'm getting a bit of relief

I'm also just cross that my nose is tickling and my throat is feeling itchy so suspect I'm in for another cold . Just when I was ready to start aiming for my New Years fitness goals

@coldwarenigma love it!!

Loving the number of you keeping it simple "Kill him"

Please shoot me if it is me. I have had this cough since October and cannot get rid of it. GP treated my chest infection but says there is an evil cough going round that lasts forever.

BerbedBloom is right. I'm on round two of this cough after a few days of appearing to have shaken it off.

Codeine linctus is the way forward for all us coughers (though I don't know how you could press it on your colleague without looking a bit dodgy), or solpadiene if you can't get to the doctors for a prescription. Also, try very hard to cough and clear your throat as little as possible- not until you absolutely must. Then you'll have less throat irritation and less phlegm production as time goes on.

I've had a cough for 6 weeks beginning with tonsillitis. Now onto crackly chest but just tickle cough stage and I agree, kill him. It would be a kindness

Or yes offer boiled sweets and suggest getting pholcodeine cough suppressant off the pharmacist.

Ltb

Take him in a bottle of bronchostop cough medicine , it actually works .

I have this cough. It’s annoying me way more than it’s annoying anyone else. Has he got some lozenges?

Pholcodene linctus is the only thing that works. My DH coughed all night for about 4 days over Christmas, and I was about to smother him with a pillow when he took some and FINALLY stopped!

Only another ten minutes to survive!! He has a short day tomorrow so if he's as annoying ill tomorrow i might suggest some of those remedies to him. Feel sorry for his poor wife tbh