To get the impression he's expecting me to offer ?

[Werkwerkwerkwerk]

DSS has been away for Xmas. We are celebrating Xmas with him on Monday. We share gift buying pretty evenly between DH and I. But I have a closer/larger family so more to buy for, so DSS's gifts get bought by him.
DH hasn't started shopping for DSS yet. We have plans today and tomorrow. I think he's basically got himself stuck and won't admit it he hasn't planned well. 'I've cocked up and have no time to buy gifts can you help'. I can see it a mile off - however I get the impression he is looking for me to volunteer a solution rather than thinking of one himself ...... when I have asked him what he is thinking of for DSS he's says oh I'll worry about that later. Is it just me or is this unreasonable?!

You have made two good suggestions.

Leave him to it.

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

You are so right and that's the way we do it here too.
It must be so exhausting to live in a household where the inhabitants refuse to do things for one another because one of them has a vagina, a penis or whatever and is terrified that helping out-when it isn't their role- would be seen as a sign of weakness.
Poor sad things.

It must be exhausting to live in a family where you have to second guess your partner's intentions all the time because you don't trust him or believe him despite the fact he says he's got it covered. Stop fretting and leave him to it. It's fine, you are just inventing stuff to worry about.

Always cast as the wicked step mother ......

Always cast as the wicked step mother

That’s power for the course with a lot of posters, OP. If you had went out and bought the gift on his behalf and said it was because you didn’t trust him to do it, you would have been told that you were controlling and interfering in his role as a father. 🤷‍♀️

You’ve offered suggestions and your DH is an adult who says he can handle it. If he needs help he’ll ask, and I’m sure you’ll be happy to lend a hand if he does. I feel it’s disrespectful to force your involvement anyway after another adult has said they’ll sort it on their own and doesn’t ask you to help. I wouldn’t get involved, because I trust and respect my DH.

I've had enough of women blaming other women for not covering for shit that men can't be arsed to do because he knows that if he's shit enough a woman will do it for him.

This!

I've come to the conclusion that stepmums just can't win on here. They can't do right for doing wrong. Leave it to your husband. You have made a few suggestions and he has rejected them all. The ball is well and truly in his court. Let him at it.

I've had enough of women blaming other women for not covering for shit that men can't be arsed to do because he knows that if he's shit enough a woman will do it for him.
^^
This.

If she gets something he has specifically said no to she will be wrong and controlling and "overstepping her role" yadda yadda. If she gets nothing she is a lazy unfeeling step mum keeping boundaries between her and dss.
Women cant win any way on here.

That’s power for the course

Haha love it

The phrase is 'par for the course'.

The phrase is 'par for the course

I’ll just blame spellcheck. The sentiment is the same.