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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bloody police - merry sodding Christmas

345 replies

NThound · 26/12/2019 14:44

More than 2 months ago I made a bloody stupid error and just slipped through a red light in queuing traffic though I had actually noticed that a police car was a few cars behind - I don't make a habit of breaking the law, but it does make it even more stupid. He pulled me over a bit up the road (which was horrible - never happened to me before in 15 years of driving) and I admitted my error of judgement and apologised. In my defense (I didn't say this to him as I didn't want to make excuses) it was awful traffic - we had been stuck there for ages and I was visiting an elderly relative who I rarely see and had to nip out for something and felt guilty and stressed at how long it was taking). It was my fault though I know.

Police man said he had written it up and would send it off but 'hopefully' I would hear nothing back in the light of my apology and clean license. He also checked my tyres as he said they were currently focussing on them but he then made no comment on them.

I had my MOT done two weeks later and it failed on one of the tyres, which I thought was odd but never mind. Weeks went by and I heard nothing then on Christmas fucking Eve came the letter. FFS. I have just logged on to try and book a course and I have less than two months to book it because this has taken more than two months to come through. In order to get it done in time I have a choice of two courses that are within 30 miles of me - I live in a central location between two biggish cities. It's ridiculous - I'm going to have to try and get time off but don't want to risk a refusal as then I'd be stuffed so may decide to call in sick, which is not something 'I want to do.

AIBU to think this is shit? If police think you have made an honest fuck-up they shouldn't 'write it up' and if they do it shouldn't be near enough impossible to book a course you have been offered because they have sat on it for more than 2 months?

OP posts:
Rachelfromfriends1 · 26/12/2019 19:17

In my quiet, residential area, a cyclist died a few months ago. Very nasty car collision. There were cars parked on a minor junction, blocking the view of the road for other drivers and creating a wider blind spot.

The car that hit the cyclist wasn’t paying proper attention but the stupidly parked cars absolutely contributed. Anyone that parks there now gets a note stuck on their windows reminding them of the incident and how they’re blocking the view of the road, yet I’ve seen people complaining about the notes on Facebook🙄

Their flippant attitude was much like the OP’s, it’s minor/it was quiet/nothing actually happened etc. The point is your actions could still impact other vulnerable road users, it’s just inconsiderate even if “nothing happened” - that may be the case this time, but what about next time?

SuperMumTum · 26/12/2019 19:42

You were always going to get flamed on AIBU. Mumsnetters HATE lawbreaking no matter how minor. FWIW I also believe you were in the wrong, now you need to suck up the punishment.

Karenisbaren · 26/12/2019 19:44

A man once jumped an amber light and killed someone.

fligglepige · 26/12/2019 19:46

Your attitude is why people are offered the course. I was annoyed at being prosecuted for speeding until I did the speed awareness course. Every single day I'm out driving I remember what I learned on that course.

Mlou32 · 26/12/2019 19:53

I think your actions, which you have admitted to and apologised for, still could have caused an accident or at worst, killed someone. Now you have to deal with the consequences. Just get it over and done with and that'll be that.

BellsAJingleTheRoastedChestnut · 26/12/2019 19:56

You were always going to get flamed on AIBU. Mumsnetters HATE lawbreaking no matter how minor. FWIW I also believe you were in the wrong, now you need to suck up the punishment.

I know what you mean, but tbh, I think most people object to the op bitchig about the police for doing exactly what they're supposed to do, rather than the actual offence. If she hadn't been having a moan I think responses would have been quite different.

yellowallpaper · 26/12/2019 20:07

Don't take the points, it really bumps up your car insurance.

halocompanach · 26/12/2019 20:10

Don't take the points, it really bumps up your car insurance.

Then she shouldn't have decided to deliberately jump a red light. It bumps up the insurance because it gives the insurance company an idea that you are a higher risk of an accident - which the OP is. She doesn't care so should pay the price.

It was her description of the police as 'bloody police' that really riled me.

yellowallpaper · 26/12/2019 20:12

FWIW. I went through on orange and then got stopped in the middle behind a car turning right. Police pulled me over as it had gone red by the time I was clear to cross, but they were fine about it. I have gone through a few red lights in my time trying to rush the orange, and I know it's quite wrong. I really can't believe no ones done it before. I see loads of drivers, usually men, going through a solid red light. I am on the road over 10 hours a week normally so I see tons of crap driving.

eaglejulesk · 26/12/2019 20:12

You went through on a red light! The fact that there was no risk of an accident occurring has absolutely nothing to do with it - a red light means stop. The police have a job to do. You are blaming the wrong person here.

ZebrasAreHorsesInPyjamas · 26/12/2019 20:17

So you went through a red light and if a person coming in the opposite direction jumped an amber light how can you possibly say there was no chance of an accident?!! You say there was no-one coming, how can you be sure? Surely if you could see that you could see the red light? You said it was really busy, but there was no traffic? Huh??

Yes, you could have killed someone. I've seen it. I'm glad you were caught. Suck it up and be glad they have given you the chance of a course. Stop looking for loopholes in what the Police may have done wrong!

Don't go sick. Admit to your employer what you did wrong and ask them for an unpaid day off. Taking a sick day to cover for your error really shows your true colours. You are still saying it's basically not your fault and why should you suffer. Unless you don't get paid for sick days.

PixieDustt · 26/12/2019 20:24

So you went through a red light and if a person coming in the opposite direction jumped an amber light how can you possibly say there was no chance of an accident?!! You say there was no-one coming, how can you be sure? Surely if you could see that you could see the red light? You said it was really busy, but there was no traffic? Huh??

This.

scarbados · 26/12/2019 20:35

CBA to read the whole whining thread of excuses and reasons why it wasn't the OP's fault.

I've worked in A&E and seen people brought in dead because of idiot drivers who are never to blame and 'didn't think it would matter'. One was a 14-year-old on his way to school for the last day before Christmas.

However the police handled the incident and the paperwork, the fault lies with the entitled moron who thinks she's been badly treated. She could have killed someone.

elmosducks · 26/12/2019 20:42

@scarbados that's so sad. I'm so sorry for everyone affected by that. Thank you for doing the work that you do, and dealing with these emergencies.

halocompanach · 26/12/2019 20:45

@scarbados thank you for doing your work Flowers

spingly · 26/12/2019 20:51

I don't think that OP will be coming back anytime soon........ she's jumping red lights all the way away from this thread!

🚦 🚦 🚗 🚗

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 26/12/2019 20:54

Don't take the points, it really bumps up your car insurance

It's not too bad. I'm on 6 at the moment. Thought I had 9 but some must have come off. It's just a consequence of driving a lot of miles each year. Hey ho.

Rachelfromfriends1 · 26/12/2019 20:56

Oh FFS, I looked at the junction and there was nothing coming. Wrong to go through the red light - just - but not dangerous as there was nothing there.

That’s not an “honest fuck up” at all. You just purposely went through the red so why would they let you off? You acted as if your car accidentally rolled slightly forward beyond the lights, or that you were in completely packed standstill traffic when the lights changed. You’ve probably done this before if you were so brazen to do it in front of the police.

Everyday I see drivers far worse than me.

As you apparently aren’t aware: you are officially on the same level as them! Congrats. I’m truly ecstatic I get to share the roads with people like you x

NigellaAwesome · 26/12/2019 21:03

From memory, a Notice of Intended Prosecution is only issued if you weren't cautioned at the time. Presumably since the police stopped and spoke to you at the time they also cautioned you.

Be thankful you are being offered the chance to do a driver awareness course and not being prosecuted.

halocompanach · 26/12/2019 21:04

@Leighhalfpennysthigh It's just a consequence of driving a lot of miles each year. Hey ho.

No, it's a consequence of not following the law regarding safe driving.

Cryingoverspilttea · 26/12/2019 21:07

@Leighhalfpennysthigh err no, love.

"It's just a consequence of driving a lot of miles each year."

It's a consequence of being a fucking shit and dangerous driver. You are not the exception 😂

Oddly enough I've been driving hundreds of thousands of miles for 17yrs and have never, ever, had a point on my licence or had an 'at fault' accident.

Nomorepies · 26/12/2019 21:07

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on the poster's request.

KarmaStar · 26/12/2019 21:12

A driver jumped a red light but my elderly neighbour.
Not keeping tyres in good repair can affect breaking too.
Yabvu.

KarmaStar · 26/12/2019 21:13

Hit not but

GladAllOver · 26/12/2019 21:13

92% YABU and the OP still thinks she was right.