Long, not to dripfeed.
At PILs this year. Meant to see my dsis day after boxing day and go home that night. However MIL has booked a big group of her friend and all her friends's family to come on 27th. Dsis is unwell and doesn't want to just fit in with the other family. MIL didn't want to add an extra 2 guests to the huge number here on 27th so Ive ended up driving 90mins there and back to pick up non driving dsis and BIL on boxing day for the day. Im also cooking the food in my family tradition. All good so far. I dont want to drive on boxing day but its a choice I made as dsis is so down.
I do resent having this family foisted on me at Christmas when Im not going to be able to see my dps or cousins because MIL has also planned a family party on 28th. Thats a different issue. Im sucking that up this year and next year hopefully make time for my friends and family (who am I kidding I know MIL would be offended if we didn't visit at Christmas but when the boot is on the other foot my family don't get a look in).
MIL has been friends with this woman lets call her Amy, A for short since forever. They have similar aged children and grandchildren who are perfectly pleasant who we see once every 1 or 2 or 3 years. They never usually get involved in our family Christmas celebrations.
So the AIBU. A's family was going to stay over (already Im thinking thank Christ that's not happening, its awkward enough with close friends and family). Anyway A says her dgc were looking forward to "a sleepover" and are disappointed that isn't happening. MIL is a generous host and loves these kids so immediately said they could stay anyway. Apparently without their mum (divorced in case you wonder where the dad is in all this).
This is where Im put out. I dont see why the kids need to stay over. My two are over excited over tired over indulged and strung out. At the end of the day I will just want to get them into bed and I don't want to be dealing with 2 more children than I have to the next day.
MIL got in a huff when I said it was a bad idea and that I didn't want to be facilitating a dc "sleepover" on top of a day of entertaining 10 of A's family on top of Boxing Day buggered up by the A family party plan, on top of Christmas day (children already at fever pitch) on top of the pre Christmas run up which has been busy.
We are only getting a short break from our full on jobs this year and its been monopolised by DH's family. DH is very well mannered and would never take advantage of others' hospitality like this and foist our dc on an A equivalent in the same circumstances. But hes just saying to let MIL get on with it and look after all 4 children.
Thing is MIL isnt a well woman and I'd feel a cow letting her do that. Dh will probably get involved in sorting it out which is not great as he is totally knackered from overwork.
So not looking to get savaged on here. How do I put this? Do I stay quiet or do I state its all a bit much and personally think its better if the dc go home with the rest of their family.