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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

hands up who got a baylis and harding gift set!

71 replies

PineappleDanish · 25/12/2019 10:02

I did.

From my mother. Even after lots of conversations through the year about how we're using solid shampoo and bars of soap to cut down on plastics.

She explicitly asked what we wanted for christmas and we decided to ask her for vouchers for a family day out at a local attraction. But apparently we had to have "something to open too". So mine was a Baylis and Harding set and a car of whole nut cadbury's chocolate which I don't eat either because of palm oil.

DH got a similar gift set as did DS. Suspect they were on a 3 for 2.

Not wanting to be ungrateful but if she'd just have stuck to the plan we would all have been delighted.

OP posts:

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 25/12/2019 10:03

Ah yes. But mine was from not so DSD so probably intended to a bit.... Sounds like your mum hasn't listened too well.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 25/12/2019 10:04

A car full of chocolate sounds good to me though

Original poster

PineappleDanish · 25/12/2019 10:07

Unfortunately just a bar. Not a car.

Kids will eat that as "discerning" isn't really part of their vocab.

OP posts:

Rosehip10 · 25/12/2019 10:08

Chill out OP. Just send the gift set to a charity shop you support.

NeverTwerkNaked · 25/12/2019 10:09

Yep! From DH, even though I only use bar soap and conditioner etc I know he meant well he just didn't think!

NeverTwerkNaked · 25/12/2019 10:10

He did get me some lovely thoughtful presents too in fairness!

Ginfordinner · 25/12/2019 10:12

I wonder how many charities are going to benefit from thoughtless gifts this year.

Original poster

PineappleDanish · 25/12/2019 10:16

I volunteer in a charity shop, did a shift on Monday and we had a bag of unwanted presents handed in then - toiletries, scented candles, jigsaws. Straight out on the shelves to be sold.

I expect we'll be seeing a LOT more of them in January.

OP posts:

thebakerwithboobs · 25/12/2019 10:16

Did she also buy the requested vouchers?

Original poster

PineappleDanish · 25/12/2019 10:17

Yes we got the vouchers too! That would have been plenty. No need to just buy stuff for the sake of having something to open.

OP posts:

TulipCat · 25/12/2019 10:23

Just chill out and try to remember that giving gifts is a two way thing. It's partly about the pleasure of giving as well as receiving. My mum is exactly the same about "something to open". Just thank her and pass it on if it's not right. Don't suck all the joy out of giving!

starsinyourpies · 25/12/2019 10:24

I am going to be quite ruthless this year, we have family who love to give lots of stuff and already took a bag to the food bank full of tins of biscuits etc so it does end up in a home just not necessarily ours!

Inforthelonghaul · 25/12/2019 10:27

Not me for the first time in 20 odd years thanks to us deciding not to swap gifts with family this year. Extremely liberating and nothing to regift or donate for a change. Even better, we have spent some lovely time with family, it’s definitely not spoilt anything.

MT2017 · 25/12/2019 10:36

I was envious of your car of chocolate until your update

Panicbuyer · 25/12/2019 10:39

No but I'd like one! 😀

YappityYapYap · 25/12/2019 10:42

Oh get a grip you miserable grinch

SweetPeaPods · 25/12/2019 10:45

I’m in a similar boat OP. My sister and sister in law both asked for ideas for kids. They didn’t buy any of the ideas (definitely not over budget, my sister said she couldn’t be bothered) so they got them things they already have. Trying not to come across as ungrateful but I would rather someone bought nothing than put no thought into a gift.

chillychicken · 25/12/2019 10:50

Two from my dad
Along with some out of date sweets

I don’t care, it’ll get used, it made us all laugh (I said “oh! No one has had any Baylis and Harding yet” just before I opened them) and I graciously thanked my Dad when he called.

Meshy12 · 25/12/2019 11:06

Personally I would say: Get over it and be thankful you have family who cares in the first place

Fluffycloudland77 · 25/12/2019 11:20

I got milk chocolate again.

Cows milk allergy 🤣

fiftiesmum · 25/12/2019 11:32

Did last year along with food items that were way past sell by date from same person (would have been harmless but probably would have lost the flavour). The gift set caused a lot family arguments as the sun shines from the gift givers rear end. I regifted the baylis and Harding back to them this year (waiting for the fall out)

thebakerwithboobs · 25/12/2019 11:50

The ingratitude is breathtaking. They bought what you wanted and also wanted you to have a gift to open on the day. If you don't want it, someone at the local shelter will be very grateful for it but give your family the pleasure of seeing you open something and appreciate the thought.

cheesenpickles · 25/12/2019 11:56

Meeee! Even though I have eight years worth in the cupboard.

Nicknacky · 25/12/2019 12:01

I feel so sorry for the family members who don’t realise that mumsnetters hate Baylis and Harding and think they are buying something nice for a loved one. Then get mocked online for it by the family member.

WorraLiberty · 25/12/2019 12:03

Me, from a lovely lady at work who doesn't know I'm allergic to perfumed stuff.

It saved the day though when eldest DS realised he forgot to get my ex MIL something, so I gave it to him to re-gift

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