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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that the queen not visiting her DH in hospital...

97 replies

AlorMy · 25/12/2019 01:14

Is yet another indication that the royal family operate on strange (to the general public) emotional terms?

Would it not be standard that family would visit if you are unwell and in hospital?

And yet it appears that the Queen and family did not attend Prince Philip’s side.

OP posts:
eaglejulesk · 25/12/2019 06:57

They don’t have a real marriage so why is anyone surprised?

What exactly is a "real marriage" and who are you to judge??

Panicbuyer · 25/12/2019 06:57

He was there for 4 days not 4 months!

I wouldn't want visitors for a 4 day visit. Mom-Thurs definitely not - everyone is at work, school & college. Maybe a quick visit if it was the weekend but everyone has a life to get on with.

I don't understand entire extended families visiting en masse.

Panicbuyer · 25/12/2019 06:59

Obviously depends on the circumstances and reason for hospital visit.

I'm sure if it was serious, the family would've there.

Littlemeadow123 · 25/12/2019 07:38

Even in a private hospital, that would cause massive disruption to the hospital staff as well as other patients and visitors.

Plus the queen is also in her nineties and all hospitals are full of germs. They wouldn't want her to catch anything.

He would know doubt want his children/grandchildren and great grandchildren to enjoy the festive period, noy sit around a hospital bed. While it is a holiday, it is also kind of work related with every one expected to pose for pictures (or videos like the one of the line of succession making christmas cake) to give the impression of a happy relaxed royal family.

Mrsjayy · 25/12/2019 07:41

He was in for a checkup he was in last year for the same check up he probably thinks visitors are stuff and nonsense, I am sure if he was seriously ill the Queen would be there.

JellyfishandShells · 25/12/2019 07:42

If she'd visited him it would have gone from being a 'scheduled appointment nothing to see here move along' to 'HE'S ON THE WAY OUT!!!' in a nano-second

This.

Just because there wasn’t a photo op for the tabloids to splash , the gossip mongers ( including the OP) are trying to make their own drama. I have had some rounds of surgery over the past few years- wanted my DH to collect me on discharge, but didn’t need or want him visiting. I kept him updated by phone.

A man of the Duke’s generation and upbringing has ‘ Do Not Make a Fuss’ as a fundamental part of his being.

Mrsjayy · 25/12/2019 07:43

Ive been in hospital for tests I didn't have visitors for the 2/3 days I was in.

RingtheBells · 25/12/2019 07:44

He was only in for a short time, though judging by reality TV shows some can't be apart for above a day with all the wailing that goes on about letters from home etc.

SunshineCake · 25/12/2019 07:45

Oh shut up. He seems the type to not want a fuss and the Queen is strong on duty and not changing plans and putting others out. Stop being so bloody rude and sneery.

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 25/12/2019 07:46

They live separate lives!! She has no need to

Splodgetastic · 25/12/2019 07:49

I have two theories. DoE doesn’t want people to see him in a weakened state. DoE threw a sickie because he is very angry with the rest of the family. And I don’t think the Queen would want to let other family members / the public down by not being at Sandringham. Also, I imagine this year has been pretty stressful for the Queen and maybe she just wants to chill with a Dubonnet?! Doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about DoE and maybe he told her that she ought to rest up and not undertake an unnecessary and quite long journey (long for a 90-odd year old woman).

Spikeyball · 25/12/2019 07:49

Hospitals are not the best place for someone in their nineties to be unless they need to be there.

Equanimitas · 25/12/2019 07:50

She could have visited him discreetly. The ‘firm’ can manage this for numerous frequent hospital appts during pregnancies.

Do they? Surely for everything except scans the doctor/midwife can come to them.

TheStuffedPenguin · 25/12/2019 07:53

The Queen has many charitable and other family commitments at this time of year . She would not drop these .

IHateBlueLights · 25/12/2019 08:12

When the Queen mother was on the way out they all visited.The same would apply if the Duke was that ill, I think.

MollyButton · 25/12/2019 08:17

Also t be honest with the Royal family - although none of them directly visited, plenty of their staff could well have been visiting and reporting back. And nowadays we even have telephones and skype - so very easy to stay in real contact. And in his nice Private hospital there will be enough staff to provide a good standard of care, so no worries there. And he will have enough of his own staff to collect extra PJs or whatever.

Nannewnannew · 25/12/2019 08:19

Greyhound22 At last someone who thinks the same as I do! I have several friends and acquaintances who have their husbands with them 24/7 even as far as going for dental appointments etc. What on Earth is that about? These are grown women who are in for a terrible shock if left on their own.
OP As for the Queen and Prince Phillip, they have always been stoic and independent, it’s their way of life and totally different to us commoners. So I’m not surprised there were no visitors.
PS Greyhound22 I love your user name because I love greyhounds and guess you do too! Happy Christmas to you and your greyhound/s if you have any. 🎄😀

WineOrGinOrBoth · 25/12/2019 08:29

Yes to Greyhound22 I don’t understand women who can’t cope without their husbands. I’ve several health conditions & dh has only ever come to a handful appointments & that’s only when he’s been needed to push my wheelchair.

busybarbara · 25/12/2019 08:32

Wouldn’t you want your spouse to be with you?

Depends what it was for but not particularly especially if just a few days, I’d rather not have anyone seeing me infirm

BiteyShark · 25/12/2019 08:39

I went in for a non emergency operation last year. Told DH to stay at home and look after the dog and not to visit as the hospital was around 45 mins away. We spoke by mobile after the operation. Perfectly fine as I didn't need DH by my side and it was hardly like I was dying.

Mrsjayy · 25/12/2019 08:40

I reckon it was his yearly health checkup he wasn't ill and he was Helecoptored (sp) to Sandringham for Christmas I am sure he is fine.

gamerwidow · 25/12/2019 08:47

She is also a very old woman herself. Maybe with the stress of the illness she just wasn’t up to a visit and the public performance it would require. Being a royal anywhere you go requires a level of putting on an act maybe she just couldn’t face it.

notangelinajolie · 25/12/2019 08:49

YABU some people don't want visitors. The last thing I want when I feel and look like shit is someone looking at me. I was in hospital recently and had a full on day of people cominga see me. It was exhausting when all I really wanted to do was sleep and rest. After that I told my DH to tell everyone not to come again - and that included him. I had my phone with me so I could message or talk if I needed.

PineappleDanish · 25/12/2019 08:53

Bet she was Facetiming him constantly.

TheNinkiestNonk · 25/12/2019 08:59

We only know what they want us to know! She might have been to see him, or he might not even been in as long as they said! Or he might not have been in hospital, just somewhere else!

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