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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What's the biggest lie/distortion you have seen someone post on social media?

245 replies

grumpelgoatskin · 19/12/2019 12:36

A friend posts regularly on Facebook about her very happy marriage and her wonderful husband.

In reality she cannot stand him and is looking for a way out.

I have no idea why she feels the need to post these lovey posts when she could just post nothing.

OP posts:
TLBftm · 20/12/2019 21:23

I personally think those you see the least of on SM are actually the happiest.

One of my oldest friends was recently muted because I can’t stand to see her post about her ‘amazing’ man any longer. A friend of mine who doesn’t know her was once looking at her page and commented on how lovely her man sounded etc.... he regularly cheats on her and she’s aware. She cries to me about it a lot. Then posts shit like that and it angers me! Her DM think the sun shines out of his arse and I’ve come close to telling her what he really is numerous times. I haven’t and I don’t say anything as it’s simply not my business but I’ve had to mute her!

WatchingFromTheWings · 20/12/2019 21:28

My sister regularly posts about how wonderful her kids are and how much she loves them and how close they are. To their faces she regularly tells them she wished they'd fuck off and go and live with their sperm donor fathers (her exact words). Her daughter is regularly in the heads office for bullying other kids. When they were smaller she'd palm them off to random babysitters or grandparents every weekend to go out.

Smelly50 · 20/12/2019 21:41

I think don't think LII205 was being obtuse just not aware of social media . I am not either and now font feel like I dare ask

OlaEliza · 20/12/2019 22:05

Oh wow @MentalHealth101. I think I have an idea of who this couple could be going by your description...

Beckhams or the clooneys, tho he's supposed to be gay.

Instagrrr · 20/12/2019 22:12

A few.

The ones who post gifts like beautiful engraved jewellery from independent businesses from her husband for Christmas saying “oh my hubby has such good choice” - her hubby can barely string a sentence together but of course he bought you those himself 🙄

The ones selling dieting mlm shite, posting amazing before and after pics - who in reality actually are starving themselves and in the gym for 5 hours a day maintaining their physique.

The one who constantly brag about their lovely man who couldn’t possibly put a foot wrong, takes on her children and everything but is fucking everything that moves when he’s away with work 😬

In my experience, the more people openly post and brag about stuff, the more insecure they are about it. Social media is strange 🤷🏼‍♀️

NoKnickerElastic · 20/12/2019 22:43

Old friend who shares pictures of her beautiful perfect life, husband and children. Reality is we all know he's unfaithful when on work trips (she told us!), she takes anxiety medication and they haven't had sex for years. I can only imagine she stays for the money and lifestyle but I've often thought the pressure to be insta perfect fuels her anxiety.

BenevolentEzza · 20/12/2019 22:49

THE single best thing I did was delete every SM account I had well over a year ago.(except for MN and reddit but I'm anon here and there, pretty much doubt anyone can guess who I am 😁 Never know though eh...? 🧐😲)

looselegs · 20/12/2019 22:57

I have a friend whose son has been diagnosed with various health conditions. Thing is, myself and various other people are convinced that a lot of it is in his mind because he has literally been brainwashed since birth- child was constantly told that there was something wrong with them,and whatever was wrong was always the worst case of it ever; if you had a cold, he had swine flu....that kind of thing. Have actually witnessed first hand, several times, how the boy behaves and a lot of it is put on. Doctors have actually mentioned Munchausens in the past. His Mum raves on SM about how supportive her amazing husband is.....her rock, and wingman.......who, in reality , frequents strip bars and talks about his wife and son in such a derogatory manner, it's shameful!

Summerisdone · 20/12/2019 23:02

My sister (and I’m inclined to believe a few other people) ‘banks’ her holiday pics and then posts them regularly throughout the year so it looks like she’s away much more than she actually is. For example, late last year she was in Rome, then this year she went to Paris, California and New York, but then she doesn’t post all pics at the time and instead posts different pictures of all the trips at various times of the year so it looks like she’s away when she’s actually not. People who may have not seen her for a few months will then comment saying “away again, you’re always on holiday, so lucky” etc. and she’ll actually reply with things like “I’m just love travelling and seeing new places so much”, so she’s not confirming but also not denying being on holiday.
Her doing this has now made me spot quite a few others who seem to be doing this too. I just quietly cringe and make no comment Grin

Shreksearcandle · 20/12/2019 23:38

Loose how do you know doctors have mentioned Munchausen? Does she tell you?
I'm baffled by these the most, the ones where people are open with all their friends yet still post the opposite of what they're saying irl. Unless they're influencers or something surely their friends are all the same people they're bitching to? I have a colleague like this, she literally hates everyone in her life, speaks to her colleagues, grown up kids and husband like shit. We hear it all when she's on the phone/ when she's ranting about how awful they are. She bitches about us and her RL friends, we hear her on the phone to them too bitching about her family/ job. And yet her FB is full of the joys of life! Christmas, family events, holidays, we hear all about the row she had, how A is so lazy, B tried to take over, etc etc etc. Again, she tells us colleagues about it then we hear her repeating the story over the phone to her friends. But FB shows a different story, who is she doing it for?!

Ginfordinner · 20/12/2019 23:41

A girl who DD went to school with and who now does sex cam work. She spent a year at university then dropped out. She claimed that she went to a world top 50 university to do a STEM subject and ended up with the highest marks in her year.

All lies.

GarlicChickenKiev · 20/12/2019 23:46

My mum sharing her quiz results that she's an^ 100% empath jumps to stately homes thread^

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 20/12/2019 23:53

Me, today. Posting that it’s my dds birthday and what a lovely young lady she’s become. We have actually had a lovely day but tonight she was an absolute cow to her little sister and I ended up swearing at her and sending her up to bed. Not my finest moment and one that I will no doubt beat myself up over for the next few years but she was really mean. Dd2 was nearly in tears. Sad

sleepingkat2020 · 21/12/2019 00:17

girl i used to work with at a salon. Lived with her boyfriend, gained weight so started hitting the gym hard. then appeared on a well known reality tv cooking/dining show and the "fame" went to her head. soon after began an affair with an older married man she met at the gym. He had 2 tween sons. Within 6 months they were both looking in top form, very fit, and left their significant others, moving in together. from day one she was on facebook constantly about "my boys" (meaning her new BF & his 2 sons). How his ex wife didnt kill her I dont know. Constant #makingmemories and #familytime posts with photos of her and these children.

Within 2 years she was pregnant herself, with a #worldie of a #miraclebaby. Stepsons never get a mention now. Not one photo, never in the background. Shes since had a second child and the "my perfect family" shit just rolls on, without the 2 boys.

after 2 pregnancies shes gained weight again, but her husband hasnt. he regularly still goes to the gym (where he sleeps with anything that moves while complaining about his "lazy, spiteful wife" at home)

looselegs · 21/12/2019 00:20

@Shreksearcandle her OH told us! Apparently they've been at the doctors and hospital so many times that they thought Munchausens could be a possibility.

undercoveraessedai · 21/12/2019 01:16

This is the best thread I've read anywhere on the internet for months - thank you! Lifted me right out of a gloomy mood!

I only really use SM for my business but this is still a great reminder that all is not always what it seems...

Rachelfromfriends1 · 21/12/2019 03:34

didn’t happen to anyone I know personally but I saw a post on twitter of a link to a YouTube video, where this guy exposed his ex’s lies

he got his one night stand pregnant with twins. he initially posted about how excited he was to become a dad, then the children-related posts went completely quiet later in the year so his friends/family would ask him how are the twins.

he didn’t name her, just said that it’s a really hard situation but the twins never existed. the “mother” completely lied about being pregnant for the majority of the year: she sent him ultrasounds from google; made up fake appointments then conveniently cancel; posted photos with a bump; said she had given birth but then later pretended to have a miscarriage complete with faux hospital stays. she maintained the lies on her social media too. eventually he went to her house to see the “newborn twins”, where her parents were absolutely baffled and told him that she was never pregnant.

Devereux1 · 21/12/2019 08:54

I know of someone whose whole career on FB, and what she tells people, is a lie. She claims she is a "fashion stylist" and it's true it is something she'd like to do. But unfortunately in real life her style preferences don't fit with what people want and she's ever got this off the ground.

So instead, she is fashion's Walter Mitty. All her images are taken from the internet, but she pretends they are taken from a "hard day backstage styling", etc. She has many followers - most not in the UK so they can't find her out - all who innocently believe that it's all real. She posts images that might appear in Vogue, occasionally she sails close to the wind and someone asks her about a piece of clothing in the picture, and she lies further and pretends she was there, how difficult it was to work with that item of clothing, and so on.

If anyone asks her where the photo was taken, or when the styling shoot will appear in a magazine, she says it's a secret location, or she's not allowed to say but wait and see. She posts stolen photos of incredibly expensive clothes and says they are her "purchase of the day". If a follower tells her they'd love to see a photo of her wearing it, she just says "it'll come", but of course, it never does. She takes this out of FB too and tells everyone to their faces that she is a working as a top fashion stylist. It's all a terrible lie.

It's twisted, bizarre but in the end, tragic. She's obviously a very troubled woman. Sad

Madcatgirl · 21/12/2019 10:09

I’ve got one of these friends on Facebook / IG. Everything is perfect. Hubs is her life. Kids come first. Love my family sooo much, etc.

In reality she was having a raging affair with a man who’s now moved abroad and offered to bring her over and live in a flat. She actually considered it!

Hangingwithmygnomies · 21/12/2019 11:41

DH's cousin constantly posts about how she's such a hard working single Mum and does everything she can to improve herself so she can provide for DC and her own business etc. Posts about how she's worked so hard to provide the home she has for them, will dish out unwanted advice to others about how they should work hard to get themselves out of certain situations e.g not working and on benefits but the reality is, she has a partner, is on benefits and lives in a council place (no shame as I live in a council place too) and palms her child off to her Mum at any opportunity. Has weekends away - paid for by her BF I believe - but never takes her child - she even went to Disney without said child! Just hyprocitical BS!

One friend posts about she struggles being a single working Mum to 2 (one with SEN) and how she has no support, no one cares or helps her, she never gets time to herself and has no money, yet she regularly posts photos where they're eating out again oe she's out, sometimes several times a week or having a massage at an expensive local spar. One of her family members actually called her out on it a couple of weeks ago, it was quite amusing Grin

Devereux1 · 21/12/2019 11:52

Surely most posts by celebrities blatant lies? Similar to everything we've written above.

I remember Gerri Halliwell years ago, when she was painfully thin, telling young girls she never diets, she eats healthily, something about loads of healthy soup, do what she does etc. Then years later everything about her eating problems and most-certainly-not-normal-or-healthy-soup eating and her lies came out. Dangerous stuff when it influences young people.

MsMaisel · 21/12/2019 14:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Callaird · 21/12/2019 14:46

@TheMovingFishfinger People would say that about my mother and my relationship, I moved out of home at 16 as there wasn't enough room in the house they rented, they could have afforded more but want to move quickly. I moved into a flat and they covered some of the rent because I had the family dog with me as their rental had a no dog policy. I moved away to London at 21 and have lived away since. I didn’t visit often, birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, always someone else I’d rather see (I’m a nanny so spent a lot time with ex charges) they never phoned me, I called them once a fortnight, I did an experiment when I was about 24 and didn’t call them, my dad called after 14 weeks to check I was ok!!

When my boyfriend died the police officer asked who I want her to call I said ‘I want my mum’ she drove 86 miles to be with me.

My mum now has a life limiting illness. I gave up work to help get her sorted out with everyone who could help, for a few months. 18 months later I’m still here!! I love my mum dearly and will be truly heartbroken when she passes away.

grumpelgoatskin · 21/12/2019 16:25

@undercoveraessedai Grin

OP posts:
MentalHealth101 · 21/12/2019 16:38

Sorry I think I explained things confusingly. English isn’t my first language. Definitely nothing as exciting as the Beckhams. But the couple I’m talking about are popular amongst those that have encountered them in real life. They do have a huge fan base compared to the average person but nothing like TV celebs! Not really actors or anything just social figures that made it into the talk of the town as life goals. Sorry not much juicy gossip! None of you would know them I’m sure.