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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed he didn’t bother to use his Christmas present

133 replies

Gherkin14 · 19/12/2019 11:46

Last Christmas I bought OH an experience day at silverstone. It was valid for an entire year and yet despite reminding him throughout the year to book a date, he didn’t go. His excuse being he had booked it for this week but his calendar app recently deleted all its data so he forgot. I feel quite upset as I really thought this was something he would enjoy and feel he really didn’t make any effort to go-we don’t even live far from it. He doesn’t seem to think it’s his fault and is blaming it on an app ☹️

OP posts:
tillytrotter1 · 21/12/2019 08:41

Call the issuing company, some will extend the date a bit although if he's had it booked but not gone it's considered used by the company that issued it and you'd have to take it up with the supplier, Silverstone in this instance.

FelicisNox · 22/12/2019 17:38

YANBU and that's men for you.

FYI

I love an experience voucher but they are an absolute ass ache to book as the slots are always full or on stupid dates/times you can't go.

If you buy these things for husbands you have to be prepared to book them as well.

Which reminds me: I have a Harry Potter bus tour to book before it goes out of date!

mediumbrownmug · 22/12/2019 17:51

Is he terrible with presents in general? Some people are. My BiL is one of those people. Every year, we used to get him the same gift (one he specifically requested, and knew was non refundable as it’s printed on the actual gift). After years of buying him the same gift, I called one October to make sure that was still what he actually wanted, and got the answer that yes, it was. So DH and I bought him double what we normally did, as a bit of a treat. Cue two months later, the day after Christmas: we get a text asking us to please return the gift and give him the cash instead, as now he wants a new electronic. Hmm

He was told politely but firmly that the gift was, as he already knew and as was printed on the gift, non refundable, and that we certainly wouldn’t be handing over any additional cash after spending double on his gift and even checking first.

He didn’t speak to us for three months. He now gets a much smaller gift, of our choosing. Grin

msmum007 · 24/12/2019 00:35

My husband has a brain like a sieve so I’ve given up on expensive car racing vouchers, or any other experience vouchers. Before that I bought expensive presents, like aftershave, clothes, a briefcase(matching his exact description), etc, all of which weren’t quite right. He carelessly, but gently(if it was made of glass) throw it to one side. Then it would get relegated to one side in the spare room. He acted like a spoilt rotten, ungrateful child.

You probably wonder what I got back. I’d get a hastily written an IOU to take me to X for afternoon tea, so not ‘just for me’, but he quickly ran out of ideas and it became a promised shopping trip. Well that’s tricky as I’m in a wheelchair, and I buy all clothes online. But now it’s a shopping trip every year.

So now I’ve now got into the habit of returning all of his hastily handwritten vouchers(which I’ve religiously kept over all these years) that he’s scribbled to me over all the years back, one per year, adding a post script; return shopping trip, oh that cancels one of my cards out doesn’t it? I’ve only got another 43 left, including a Christmas ones.

You may wonder why the hell I keep old hand written cards? Because over the years I’ve now got my Nan’s last Christmas card, my Sister’s Christmas cards, Grandparents, Great Grandmother, and the corresponding birthday cards. There’s always an odd cheeky comment, joke, or something else that they’ve said that’s been particularly poignant, funny and precious to me. Some have written personal jokes, memories or personal names. None of them though, have ever made excuses or pathetic promises. But they have all, without fail, but with a lot of thought, all have expressed beautiful terms of endearment.

It’s those that I hold most dear.

bumblingbovine49 · 24/12/2019 01:27

DH did a version of this for my 50th. He got two friends to say they wanted to take me to a.spa ( which I love). He also secretly organised around 10 other friends and family ( some who I hadnt seen in years ) to turn up.at the spa. He also organised a fantastic afternoon tea there for all.of us ( another thing I love) . I so received two video diaries from friends who live abroad ( organised by DH as well).

The whole thing was wonderfuland this is from someone who doesn't usually like surprises but was.completely organised by DH ( with the help of two of my friends ) . He went to a lot of effort to trace old friends.and organise a date most people.could.make. He spent months organising it.

That.is pretty much the only experience gift I have enjoyed and it was pretty much a once in a.lifetime.thing really

katewhinesalot · 24/12/2019 08:58

Ring up today and exchange and extend it for something you want to do. Most of them are exchangeable.

Don't bother telling him you've exchanged it, just let him think it's expired.

Jezebel101 · 25/12/2019 16:54

One thing I've never wanted is a FitBit. I've often mentioned how I never wanted one. I'm far too much of a hypocondriac to have something giving constant feedback to be a good idea.

He didn't give me a FitBit!

He gave me an unbranded knockoff FitBit.

I gave him some Bose noise cancelling headphones and a Citizen watch.

The moral of the story is... perhaps it's just not a present he wants and he wasn't pushed to go.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 25/12/2019 17:08

And yet l hear that gift experiences are on the rise as presents.

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