Every year for the last 20 I cook Christmas lunch at my parents house. I buy all the food, load up my car with baking trays, condiments, cooking knives and lay the table, make all the food and clear up and leave exhausted. This is because my mother refuses to not have Christmas in her home. She is elderly but goes out once a week to have a meal with my dad and a carer goes with them . This year I have been unwell and it took me a few months to get better but I feel more tired and I need to be careful. My mother said I could cook Christmas lunch in my own flat which is so less stressful for me. There's no issue re transport. I invited two friends who are on their own. Now my mother has changed her mind and insists I cook lunch at her house and my friends can come too and her carer will join us as she doesn't have family so now I am cooking in her house for my 8. My dad says he'll help but he literally can't turn the oven on. I feel so upset and can't understand why she won't come to my home, my friends wouldn't have accepted the invite if they had known it was at my parents house and I wouldn't have invited them, but they will probably feel obligated. I just feel upset and given I was really quite ill this year just really upset that my mother won't do something for me.