Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

OH and Christmas presents

76 replies

theworldhasgonecrazy1 · 14/12/2019 22:56

I really enjoy Christmas and giving presents I think people will like and have put a lot of effort into finding thoughtful things for OH. This morning he came in and said that he'd logged into my amazon account and looked at my order history to see what I had got him. I'm really annoyed and have said that I'm returning his presents as he's ruined the surprise and taken the excitement away from Christmas. I know we're adults but I also know that he doesn't get presents from his family and hasn't for quite a few years. This is our first proper Christmas together with DD and I wanted to make it special. AIBU for not wanting to bother getting him anything?

OP posts:
BeanTownNancy · 14/12/2019 22:59

I would do the same. I'm 100% a pretty bitch. If he doesn't want me to surprise him, he can buy his own presents.

Skrowten · 14/12/2019 23:00

Oh my god. Grow up

Cherrysoup · 14/12/2019 23:01

Massive invasion of privacy. Why on earth would he do that?

ErickBroch · 14/12/2019 23:08

YANBU. If it was an accident, it's different. He looked intentionally. Return!

HanginWithMyGnomies · 14/12/2019 23:10

@BeanTownNancy love that you’re a pretty bitch 😂 made me laugh sorry!

@theworldhasgonecrazy1 I wouldn’t like that one bit!

BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted · 14/12/2019 23:11

Is your OH five years old? His behaviour is not a million miles away from me snooping around the top the wardrobe in Mum and Dad’s bedroom!

Return everything

Havaina · 14/12/2019 23:11

It looks like he's sabotaging Christmas because you're looking forward it. What's he like day to day?

BeanTownNancy · 14/12/2019 23:14

@HanginWithMyGnomies - oh autocorrect, you've fucked me again. Grin

I'm a petty bitch!

BackforGood · 14/12/2019 23:15

Sounds like you both need to grow up, tbh

steff13 · 14/12/2019 23:17

I don't know if I'd return the presents, but I'd be annoyed. Why did he tell you he snooped? That was stupid.

elephantoverthehill · 14/12/2019 23:18

He sounds like 'The Grinch' imo

elephantoverthehill · 14/12/2019 23:20

Or doesn't really have an understanding of Christmas?

tillytrotter1 · 14/12/2019 23:25

OH thought he was logged on to his amazon account, in fact it was mine, and part of my present is still sitting in my basket! I'm waiting for him to realise, maybe when he comes to wrap it up!

escape · 14/12/2019 23:27

Just leave them somewhere for him - breakfast table, bedside, wherever - unwrapped & tell him he's taken any element of surprise away plus the joy of giving so he may as well have them now.

bridgetreilly · 14/12/2019 23:29

YABU. Maybe you think the fun is in the surprise but not everyone does. How is returning the presents going to improve anyone's Christmas? This way, he'll get presents but no surprise, but you'll presumably still get the surprise you love. Not everyone is the same.

bridgetreilly · 14/12/2019 23:30

Plus, if it's not really a thing in his family, why would you expect him to suddenly understand all your excitement around it?

morriseysquif · 14/12/2019 23:31

Give him a piece of coal, bah humbug.

SexlessBoulderBelly · 14/12/2019 23:32

Aw I’m undecided on this. I’m a massive grinch and hate surprises. I love giving surprises, gifts, cards ect at Christmas. But once someone’s mentioned they’ve got me something I just need to know what it is, I absolutely hate not knowing to the point it makes me feel quite irritable if they keep mentioning it without saying what it is.

But I would never intentionally ruin it for somebody else... I would however beg to know up until the day I unwrap it 🙈😫

PegasusReturns · 14/12/2019 23:34

I’d be furious.

Is he trying to sabotage your efforts?!

fligglepige · 14/12/2019 23:37

This is pretty low on the list of offences a partner can carry out tbh. He's spoiled his surprises, so don't get him anything else, but don't send back his presents. That's not a nice thing to do.

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 14/12/2019 23:53

I think it would be a total overreaction to send the presents back

fedup21 · 14/12/2019 23:58

Why would he do that-how odd?!

Original poster
theworldhasgonecrazy1 · 15/12/2019 00:13

I'm more annoyed that we don't have much money so the things I've bought are more small but thoughtful so wouldn't be very exciting if you were expecting them. Like small things he has mentioned he liked from months ago and chocolate he likes that he can't get from England. I do feel a bit like I'm overreacting but can't help but feel annoyed. He's also told me exactly what he's bought me and showed me a few things when they arrived Xmas Angry

OP posts:
Original poster
theworldhasgonecrazy1 · 15/12/2019 00:14

Also I don't mind that he logged into the account that's not the problem. He's not controlling and usually I wouldn't mind. It's the fact that he looked on purpose and then told me

OP posts:
MamaWeasel · 15/12/2019 00:21

Perhaps he doesn't like surprises - as much as you DO like surprises.... Time to have a proper conversation with him so that you're both understanding each other's perspective

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread