To wonder if the stripper was a girl and the resident a man... this would be weird?

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www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-suffolk-50760470

So an 89year old woman requested a man with a big chest and biceps for Christmas. And a stripper was invited into the care home and had pictures taken etc.

It's all portrayed as very good fun.

But if this had been an 89year old man, requesting a woman with 'big bobs and long legs'
Do we think the care home wouldn't have ordered a stripper...and then taken photos and then the BBC report it as feel good fun new article?

It’s a double standard, but I’m sure the women of mumsnet will be along to tie themselves in knots about how it’s fine because of the “power imbalance”.

Yep I agree and thought the same.

A girl with big bobs?

Like Dawn O’Porter?

Ha ha :p

The historical un equal power relationship is in men's favour. So it's never going to be the same if reversed.

In the situation you're imagining, are females still the oppressed class or are you rewriting history?

are females still the oppressed class or are you rewriting history?

didn't take long...

You think 5 minutes to work out that women as a class are oppressed isn't long? You're really impressed...

*easily, not really

ChristmasMovie

in this country? Nope, we are good. You might very well be in a very different country where women are oppressed, but in mine we are not. Thankfully. We are not only oppressed but we have the upper hand, it's a great position to be in.

You're not being weird to think it would be odd the other way round, but I do think the power imbalance comes into play, so though it's a bit off, it's understandable that you'd definitely not to the other way round.

Basically, that some women might occasionally sexually objectify a man, it has zero, zilch, nada effect on men in general. Doesn't collectively do them any harm. No one takes men less seriously because male strippers are a thing.

That women are sexually objectified on adverts, in film, in the street etc, has a deleterious effect on women everywhere, encouraging people to think of them as purely there to be sexy. So collectively this stuff has a negative impact on women.

I'm honestly not as much of a po-faced killjoy as this makes me sound, but it does annoy me when people equate occasional sexual objectification of men with the overwhelming, ubiquitous sexual objectification of women everywhere.

pancakes
We are not only oppressed but we have the upper hand

Bless you for trying!

I think it's quite a fun story. The guy got paid, the ladies got a bit of a show and no harm was done.

I would probably say the same if the sexes were reversed though. The body may age but the eyes don't.

Of course it wouldn't happen the other way round but, you know, just sometimes a story doesn't warrant analysis or judgement. This is one of them.

Yeah, the power imbalance is why it would seem really creepy if it were sex-reversed.

Big bobs

Nothing intelligent to add, sorry!

@safariboot really what power does and 89 year old man have over a younger woman. I would say none.

And I don’t actually disagree we can’t cure the ingrained objectification of women by objectifying men.

Last year I went to a 'holiday park for older people'. We were the youngest there (it was brilliant). One evening they had a 'Broadway' type show. Accompanying the (moderate) singers were a couple of dancing girls. They were dressed (just) but clearly there as a bit of 'glamour' and harmless titillation for the older gentlemen.

As another poster said, what threat are 60/70/80 year old men. They get a bit of a show, the ladies get paid, no harm done.

Sexual titillation is not a bad thing. I like the idea of the elderly lady in this story enjoying her 'Christmas present' and I'm sure the young chap didn't object.

'Ooooh...Young Man!'

‘As another poster said, what threat are 60/70/80 year old men’.

You are very naive.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_Savile

ChristmasMovie
trying what?

Last time I've checked I had the exact same rights and benefits as my husband, but biology game me all the power regarding children.

Not sure why you feel like such a victim, in a country where the head of state is female and the last PM was female too... try to assert yourself a bit more, you'll see, women in this country are in a great place.

That stripper looks like he's died inside, I doubt he thought that would be the glamorous stripper life!!

You said you were oppressed and had the upper hand, dear.

There's one sex that are killed at the rate of two a week by the other sex. It's so sweet that you think that's equality!

ChristmasMovie
I don't feel oppressed, and I am really sorry for you that you do. Amusing that you feel the need to use the word "sweet" to describe someone who is not a victim or feels weak. I do pity people like you, I really do. I prefer leading by example than whining online about the inflicted unfairness and inequality of our world. That's not the way I chose to raise my daughters (or sons).

Um, re 60+ men not being 'a threat' there was a 60year old serial killer in France in the late 70's. And the guy recently in the US who had a torture chamber he called his 'toy box' in his backyard was approx 70. That's just two, there are plenty more not so famous ones.