Actually hate myself

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i have so many deadlines coming up . I never do my work or revise though and it pisses me off . i think about the work all day but never do it. I hate that i don't have the motivation and dedication to do anything and thats why i'm failing

Break it down into small chunks, get up early and reward yourself after every chunk. It's the only way I got through some hideous exams last year

I think you're being way too hard on yourself which certainly won't help you progress! I find that writing tasks down and making a visual plan of action really helps. Right now, I would bet your thoughts are racing, compounding the things you need to accomplish to an unreachable feat. Take some time to take a deep breath, write down everything you need to do, and then in whatever order makes sense to you, complete each task. You can do it!

I pretty much know how you feel OP :(

@Whatdayisit2 i make to-do lists which is why i find myself so annoying that i dont do them

@Aquamarine1029 i give myself too much time off . i have a uni offer from my dream uni for my dream course which should motivate me however i just can't make myself revise and it really really annoys me. im a failure and bring it all on myself

I know exactly how you feel. Is it possible you have ADHD? It manifests differently in women to men so is often not spotted. I struggled constantly with studying and getting down to essential tasks, was always distractible as a child, always daydreaming. I was diagnosed as an adult. See if you can find a clinic and get tested. If you do have it, medication and psychotherapy such as CBT can be really helpful.
There are also books about it which might help you too www.amazon.com/You-Mean-Lazy-Stupid-Crazy/dp/0743264487?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Don't hate yourself. You're not alone in this! If you feel you are failing at academia, maybe pick a career path in the end that requires less in terms of mental or academic work, maybe doing something with your hands instead? I am training to be a massage therapist as it fits my highly distractible personality and I find massage so meditative and calming and easy to focus on. The money is good too! Some people don't fit into the office mould - and that's fine. Make your own way with the skills you have, and don't try to bash yourself into a round hole if you're actually a square peg.
Good luck OP!

You have an offer from your dream uni. Clearly, you are NOT a failure. Are there counseling services available at your current uni, or perhaps tutors that could help you?

@msflibble no I don't think so I was on top of my work during GCSE'S always revising and got very good grades everything has just gone down hill since a-levels

@Aquamarine1029 they weren't very helpful when I went to them last time so I just avoid them now

How old are you?

I am exactly the same but I do get there eventually. You need someone to keep you accountable.

Please don't hate yourself. You sound as if you are studying for A levels now - this is a time for finding out about yourself, your strengths and also who you are not.

There is so much pressure these days to follow the expected path - working hard at school, get place at Uni, work hard at Uni . . .etc etc.
I did all of those things and it took me years to find the career that I love - which required far fewer qualifications. Maybe this is a dream university but maybe there are other dreams to pursue. If this is your dream university and you really wanted/needed to go there, you would probably be much more motivated to do what is needed.

Work hard by all means. And yy to checking out ADHD in women. But there's an old MN saying, which is if someone tells you who they are, believe them. If you are dodging deadlines, and reluctant to get down to work, maybe you are not going to be happy at Uni. Maybe there's a more structured career out there for you in which you will excel.

Don't give up on yourself. Give yourself every chance to work hard, and if you really want to get to Uni, maybe you will. Teachers stress the importance of meeting deadlines, but people who miss them can sometimes still do really well. However, if you end up somewhere else that's OK too.

And well done for posting here. There are some wise old folk here and often someone will say something that really helps.

@PurpleDaisies 17

@Notverygrownup thankyou I am doing a levels. & everyone always says to me there are other paths but I really want to do nursing and make a difference to children's lives and contribute to society. It's all self inflicted and is my own fault, I just hate myself, my phone, my social media, everything.

Perhaps academia isn’t for you?

I think you should give Counselling another go. It’s an interesting process you have there.

The thing is that if you don't find some strategy now, you are going to have a really hard time at uni where everything is much less structured and the possibilities of messing around rather than working are much greater. Would your uni let you take a deferred entry to take some pressure off you for now?

If you’re doing a levels, you’ve got months and months before before exams that actually count for anything. What deadlines are you stressed about?

Phones, TV and social media are the worst! When I have a deadline I have to leave the phone in another room/floor. Or let the battery run out. I also find going out to a library (or quiet cafe) helpful, just to have a change of scenery.
Sometimes it helps to sit at a table facing a wall or a window with a clear view, just to not get distracted.
It's great that you've recognised the problem - you can beat it! Good luck!

I really feel for you. Is there another way to go into children's nursing other than uni? I know within adult nursing HCAs can do a pathway into nursing. Maybe you could look into it.
On the other hand my daughter told me that A levels were so much harder than uni.

Can you do strategic revision so you perhaps don’t have to do so much? I did this throughout uni and it only went tits up once (still passed though). I basically looked at past papers and mock papers going back 5-6 years and predicted questions and focused my revision around this. Cut out a lot of material and meant I knew those areas very well.

@vivacian it's not the academia it's everything else ; finding out I'm infertile, 2 close family deaths, interviews, mocks everything

@VeryQuaintIrene I'm actually excited for uni, a fresh environment away from my current sixth form where everything just went spiralling downward it's just about getting in there

@PurpleDaisies mocks interviews for unjs, constant stress of teachers getting on my back

Just read your update and no wonder you've had a lot of things happening distracting you from your studying . Is there any way you could take a year out.