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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how I can show my face on Monday

391 replies

cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 09:40

I went to a works Christmas do last night, drank too much and made a tit of myself.
I’m dreading going to work on Monday! AIBU to hand my notice in?! I can’t see another solution!! Help!

OP posts:
euphorbian · 07/12/2019 14:15

When drunk we always behave impeccably. Clearly you were not totally smashed.

charm8ed · 07/12/2019 14:20

But there was puke and farting involved

I’m can’t stop laughing at that, funniest thing I’ve read on here for ages.

Birthdaycakemondays · 07/12/2019 14:23

Ahhh we’ve all done it OP. I tried to kiss a guy who I didn’t even like who worked directly opposite me & he turned me down MORTIFYING on the Monday. Better than being the boring bastard though - sod it we’re all human.

AFairlyHardAvocado · 07/12/2019 14:24

Puked and farted?

If only you'd snapped and farted...

Grin
IcedPurple · 07/12/2019 14:29

Is anyone else intrigued by the farting? We haven't had a good MN fart thread in a while, so I was hoping for some details. Yes, I do have an infantile sense of humour.

ShadowOnTheSun · 07/12/2019 14:32

Meh. Don't sweat it, it'll be fine.

There was this guy at my work party. Got hammered to oblivion, stripped stark naked, wrapped a tablecloth around his private parts and was running around the place shouting 'do you want to see an elephant? Well do you? Do you?' He dropped the tablecloth and proudly announced: well, there are two ears and one little trunk, look how cute, aww.. (to his defence, the trunk was medium-sized, must say).

That's not all. He then approached a much older (female) boss, collapsed on a sofa next to her (without the tablecloth), hugged her and started crying: 'mummy... I just wanted to say, you're the best mum in the world and I love you very much..' (and similar things).

And that's not all. He then hugged a female manager, sat on her lap (yep, on her lap) and proceeded with 'jesusfuckingchrist, you're THE MOST gorgeous stunning woman in the world, would you be my wife, I love you, my heart is beating for you' and blablabla.

I'd take puking and farting, thank you very much. Oh, and the bloke kept his job, btw. He apologized after and was made fun of, but nothing horrible. His 'mummy' boss laughed the most :).

Tistheseason17 · 07/12/2019 14:37

You'll be fine.
Puking and farting fine - just a bit embarrassing but it will be forgotten until next Xmas. I have a team member who gets totally pie eyed every year but is a funny/sweet drunk who causes no harm. We remind her every year but it still happens - her dancing is ace!

Shagging a colleague, abusing the boss, fighting with a colleague are the things to watch out for!

GingleJangleScarecrow · 07/12/2019 14:41

@AutumnRose1
I think we may know each other Xmas Blush

NigesFakeWalkingStick · 07/12/2019 14:45

Can't be any worse than the young IT guy at our summer social so five years ago who got so drunk he shat up a pair of curtains on a boat trip, then puked on said shit.

One of my friends slipped down the stairs drunk at the Christmas do following that and broke her arm.

I got drunk once at a Xmas do when I was 19 and heckled none other than Lisa from Steps who was performing for us. I was mortified (but still don't like Steps)

Lindy2 · 07/12/2019 14:46

Does anyone else think the OP has gone back to bed to nurse her hangover.

I've never been so interested in a puke location as on this thread. 😂

cstaff · 07/12/2019 14:55

I worked in a law firm that had client parties where clients, barristers, judges etc were invited along with the staff. There was a girl who was an intern at the time whose father was invited. She was in the lift snogging a colleague. Outside the lift was the boss, her dad and a politician trying to have a conversation. The lift would go up, come back down and open right in front of the 3 of them.

The next day she was saying that she had never even brought a boy home before.

jillowarriorqueen · 07/12/2019 14:57

Tell them you were ill all weekend with norovirus, take the rest of the week off and then they'll feel too bad to take the piss and just thankful you didn't pass it on to them.

BlaueLagune · 07/12/2019 15:04

God British culture is so grim and unclassy. Like it's expected at a works do to have someone chucking up and making a tit of themselves

I can assure you 100% that it is not expected and I have never been to a Christmas party where I've seen that happen (and I'm 47, not 7). It may happen from time to time if alcohol is provided by the employer. Any sensible employer (I would have though most of them) offers a glass or two of wine with dinner (and a glass of bubbly at the start) and that's it.

That said, I am really quite surprised at how much alcohol some people put away at work parties. Two glasses of wine are enough for me, otherwise I'd be in bed all day the following day.

BlueChangeling · 07/12/2019 15:05

I had mine last night.

I went to sit down in a chair but someone had moved it so I ended up on the floor and cracked my head.

It's the drunkest I've been in a long term, just hoping I wasn't the worst.

Original poster
cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 15:09

Hahahaha. Puke was in the toilet, nothing too exciting. I got up at the table and farted in front of everyone about half way through the meal

OP posts:
Original poster
cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 15:09

My boss wasn’t there thank goodness. I am mid level, not junior but not manager either

OP posts:
PippiDeLena · 07/12/2019 15:09

Channel Monica from Friends "I'm breezy!". Take any ribbing on the chin, laugh along, and everybody will forget about it soon.

My worst drunken party involved me breaking out my best Jamaican dancehall moves and wowing (literally) all my colleagues. I'm a staid, middle aged, white woman. My legs were killing the day after.

travellinglighter · 07/12/2019 15:14

I had a colleague who sneaked off early to start drinking. Topped up with a ridiculous amount of free gin on the company tab and then tried to punch a manager twice his size for having the audacity to tell him not to park in the disabled space at work. Luckily another manager gripped him and dragged him out just in time. He didn’t want to apologise on Monday morning until a senior colleague took him to one side and told him he had to. It’s not the stupidest thing he’s done.

Awrite · 07/12/2019 15:17

Everyone will just be glad it was you and not them.

Brazen it out on Monday. Men do.

MissRabbitNeedsAHoliday · 07/12/2019 15:20

If you puked in the toilet and not in front of people you can totally brazen that one op! As you can see people have done much worse! Hope your feeling a bit better now.

SouthWestmom · 07/12/2019 15:20

BlaueLagune this thread says otherwise though, doesn't it? No one is surprised at this, everyone has their own tale. It's depressing, the UK attitude to alcohol.

EskewedBeef · 07/12/2019 15:22

Was the fart accidental, or done for comic effect? If the latter, was it actually funny?

Original poster
cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 15:23

Just for context, I do not drink often. I’ve just stopped bf my youngest who is 21 months so the last time I got drunk was before I was pregnant with him. That’s part of the issue, I obviously can’t handle my drink

OP posts:
Original poster
cadburyegg · 07/12/2019 15:23

Fart was accidental

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 07/12/2019 15:23

That’s the beauty of being a non drinker.
I can just laugh at other people and get high off their daftness,. Grin
Seriously though, You’re a 9 day wonder and You’re lucky to get the Luxury of 9 minutes.

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