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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend can't meet up before Xmas because she has a 3 month old baby ...aibu ?

82 replies

happydappyzoo · 05/12/2019 15:28

My friend has a baby who is 3 months and a 4 year old.
We normally go for a meal and do the exchange of gifts but the baby is still very young and she's breastfeeding.
She hasn't left the house in two weeks now.
So I had a idea of suggesting to take the "party" to her.
One tea time /early evening heading over here with some party food (m&s have lots of nice bits in) a couple of nice desserts.
Do you think that's a good idea?
She was a bit upset yesterday that she has no adult company and is lonely.
Obviously I would cook the things and wash up etc

OP posts:
QueenWhatevs · 05/12/2019 19:03

OP when my DC were babies and I was desperately lonely, what you are doing for your friend would be the perfect present already :)

Tobebythesea · 05/12/2019 19:03

It’s a lovely idea but like others have said, please check what time is best. I have a 4 month old and a nearly 4 year old and between 5-7pm is hell.

Bringing freezer meals would also be amazing.

BedraggledBlitz · 05/12/2019 19:05

You are a gorgeous friend OP!!

Meshy12 · 05/12/2019 19:07

You’re such a lovely friend - I wojld have loved a friend to do this for me in that position!

Have an amazing time!

Definitely ask her if she is drinking before buying the nosecco

Pinkblueberry · 05/12/2019 19:10

I think it’s a really good idea. Although I agree evenings can be stressful, maybe ask her what time would suit her best. You sound like a great friend!

Snaleandthewhail · 05/12/2019 19:10

When I had my first a friend brought round fish and chips and a bag of nappies. Perfect combination.

BreastedBoobilyToTheStairs · 05/12/2019 19:13

This is such a lovely thread! What a nice suggestion Op, hope you both have a great time! Smile

coffeeaddiction · 05/12/2019 19:15

Nice idea but if the baby is suffering with colic and 4 year old needs to be put to bed then it could be very stressful ! I would suggest bringing around some fancy brunch stuff instead , Buck's Fizz /pastries

carly2803 · 05/12/2019 19:38

your such a lovely friend!
echo the others, glad shes agreed but absolutely finger food/easy picky food, even with you all there she might be feeding the baby/need to do stuff 1 handed - we have all been there!

make it clear she isnt to do any hosting too! you allmake your own drinks

Ohdearohdearyme · 05/12/2019 19:40

Sounds like a lovely idea. Let her choose a time that's best for her and also a time limit if thag makes it easier still.

Could even make it into a PJ party type thing where nobody dresses up so she doesnt feel she needs to make the effort.

Peaches2018 · 05/12/2019 19:45

@happydappyzoo What a lovely idea for her especially since her little ones haven't been too well!!! Definitely thumbs up for you as such an amazing friend OP FlowersFlowers

Merryoldgoat · 05/12/2019 19:51

I was expecting a different thread when I read the title. Lovely idea.

I also would hate someone doing my
Housework for me.

Stinkycatbreath · 05/12/2019 20:00

You sound like a brilliant friend three monthe old was hellish for me. You have probably made her week.

Babyg1995 · 05/12/2019 20:11

Sounds great I would love a friend like youFlowers

Powerof4 · 05/12/2019 20:32

That’s so unbelievably thoughtful- you are a fab friend.

CorBlimeyGovenor · 05/12/2019 20:34

I think that you should do an early lunch and then take over a DVD for an afternoon Xmas/chick flick movie.

ferntwist · 05/12/2019 20:39

Sounds like a wonderful, thoughtful idea OP. Very sweet of you.

Postmissposte · 05/12/2019 20:53

This is so unbelievably lovely, well done you for being a top mate.

Tonkerbea · 05/12/2019 21:03

Well this is about the loveliest thing I've read on Aibu in...ever

Atalune · 05/12/2019 21:06

Lovely lovely post. Merry Christmas!

DuggeesWoggle · 05/12/2019 21:16

I also have a 3 month old and a 4 year old and would be delighted if my friend came round with stuff to eat and drink. My baby is breastfed but I still drink alcohol in moderation. No need to abstain while bf, just don't get plastered and don't bedshare.

I also don't go out much at the moment by choice! My son goes to pre school 3 days a week and I just love hanging out at home and cuddling my baby while she is still so small and snuggly. She's my last so I make the most of it. The dashing around doing things waits for my son's days at home and when she gets bigger.

Hope you have a lovely catch up.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 05/12/2019 21:38

Lovely idea. I used to do this with my friend who had two under two, we made it a monthly thing. It also meant I could take the baby while she spent time with DC1. Her DH often worked away, so she was always VERY pleased with M&S bits, and someone to empty the dishwasher or peg out washing!

eaglejulesk · 05/12/2019 21:41

You are a lovely friend. I hope you both have a wonderful time catching up, and I'm sure it will be just what she needs Flowers

OrangeZog · 05/12/2019 21:48

I hope you both have a wonderful afternoon.

bluebell94 · 05/12/2019 22:12

You sound like a really lovely friend OP Xmas SmileThanks

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