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AIBU?

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Original poster

Urgent: should we stay or should we go

109 replies

sef23 · 30/11/2019 11:16

Confused.com. This year we have booked a winter break in New Zealand where my family live - brother lives there and mothers visiting New Zealand as well, she lives in India. Haven't seen them in six years due to fly out dec 5th, back on Nye bargain payment of 2800 for a family of 4, brother has already paid and booked for flights from auckland (where we land) to Wellington. This is our first ever family holiday ever in 13 yrs of marriage and 2 kids.

Big problem - ds whose only 9 broke his arm 4 weeks ago plasters due to come off dec 19th.

They ve agreed to put on a split cast so we can take it off on the flight. Last x ray yesterday showed fracture is still there and still healing.

Hes a bundle of energy cant sit still, theres a high chance of refracture in the first 3 months and a full 12 months required for full repair due to angulation and movement of the bone, basically he broke it at a bad angle. (Green stick fracture in NHS terms).

I know kids heal quickly, but will he enjoy himself out there with a cast on for more than half of his trip? We were planning on lots of travelling and activities. I'm scared he ll hurt himself again and I'm worried about the low pressure on the pain and his arm hurting even though it's been 4 weeks, when they took the cast off yesterday (went round his elbow) to change it for a below elbow one it was still swollen and without the support of the cast it was hurting him.

Docs have said yes fine he can go... but hes not their child and forgive me I've had bad experiences with nhs so far in my life and dont really think some docs think things through properly. Their very busy and we don't really get more than 2 mins of their time and are shooed away pretty quickly.

Can you please give me some sensible advice. Am I being over cautious or right to be cautious I mean we can go to New Zealand again any time and have insurance to cover ticket costs.

Thanks

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 30/11/2019 13:56

It wouldn’t even cross my mind to cancel! Go!

saraclara · 30/11/2019 13:58

Something for you to consider - my health was once the reason for a cancelled and much anticipated family holiday. Even as an adult I felt terribly terribly guilty, and it still rates as one of the worst feelings of my life.

For a child to have to deal with that would be awful. And in this case entirely unnecessary as unlike my case, your doctor has said it's fine. Don't put him through that just because you're over-anxious. to go.

mumwon · 30/11/2019 14:03

having had a ds who had a season ticket to a & e when he was young I would agree with pp get letter from doctor to say he is ok to go, make sure your insurance covers you - after all he could have broken his arm over in NZ & they do have decent healthcare (& an Autism Act in about 2008 passed before ours which is beside the point but interesting)

OctoberLovers · 30/11/2019 14:03

With your update, you seem like you have made your mind up regardless of people advice....

Iggi999 · 30/11/2019 14:10

Your child has made it to 9 and never been on holiday?
And he's now about to have his first holiday cancelled?

Iggi999 · 30/11/2019 14:11

I suspect OP is someone who really doesn't like travelling if she hasn't arranged even a caravan holiday in 9 years +

TheSerenDipitY · 30/11/2019 14:14

we got doctors in stuff here, they will sort it if he hurts himself again... dont panic

spacepyramid · 30/11/2019 14:16

The flight is 28 hours in total.....

It's not all in one go though, it'll be something like 7-8 hours, 13 hours, 4 hours with time in airport lounges in between assuming you are going via the middle east/Australia.

Dontunderestimateme · 30/11/2019 14:17

As everyone else said, definitely go. I recently went on a two week holiday, involving a long flight, four weeks after surgery to have my broken collar bone pinned. I had absolutely no issues with it, just had to be a bit more careful than usual.

Poppys · 30/11/2019 14:17

If you go then make sure you tell your travel insurance company but make sure they don’t exclude his arm as an existing condition.

My DH broke his wrist last year 3 weeks before our holiday. He called the insurers to let them know about the break and they said “Ok, we’ve put that down as a pre-existing condition” so it wasn’t covered if there was a problem when away. I made him ring them back and change it - we had an annual policy and it wasn’t pre-existing!!!

All was fine luckily. He bought a Bloccs waterproof arm protector for swimming which was fab!

Spitsandspots · 30/11/2019 14:19

Go.
I doubt insurance would pay out if you cancelled because of a broken arm, especially as drs have said he will be fine.

plightofthealbatross · 30/11/2019 14:24

I can't believe you're considering not going, tbh...

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 30/11/2019 14:27

For you to be considering not going I think there must be something else going on - either excessive anxiety on your part, or you want a reason to cancel.

ActualHornist · 30/11/2019 14:29

Me neither @plightofthealbatross, I mean, aside from anything else it would be totally normal for a cast change for the arm to hurt at 4 weeks post injury.

Someonesayroadtrip · 30/11/2019 14:31

Honestly I wouldn't even consider not going. I don't think the insurance would cancel as it's not really a reason to stop anyone travelling.

zebra22 · 30/11/2019 14:32

Go

itsgoodtobehome · 30/11/2019 14:34

Sounds to me like OP doesn’t really want to go and is quite pleased to have an excuse to cancel.

Pud2 · 30/11/2019 14:39

The doctors have said he’s fine to travel so I’m not sure why you’re unsure? A broken arm is a very common injury for children and a greenstick is really not too serious. No question you should go - you’d be mad to cancel for this reason.

lurker101 · 30/11/2019 14:43

I would definitely go. I broke my arm (green stick fracture) at age 11 ten days before a two week holiday to the US. Had a fantastic time

StarClaws · 30/11/2019 14:50

I mean, if the doctors say it's fine, this would be a really weak reason to cancel a major holiday!

but will he enjoy himself out there with a cast on for more than half of his trip?

Of course he will! Being in plasters casts never stopped me having any fun as a kid! (and I was in them a few times)

TherapistInATabard · 30/11/2019 14:50

Go. And don’t take the cast off unless it gets tight and painful. The split is to allow it to give a bit. This happened to me, they just sawed through my cast and left it on, then wrapped it in removable self sticking tape. They said if it swelled up on the flight to unwrap it but leave the split cast on, and gave me more of the removable stuff to wrap it in if I needed it. It was fine and didn’t need to remove it. And this was one week after surgery for a very nasty break!

PrettyPurse · 30/11/2019 14:50

... arm 4 weeks ago plasters due to come off dec 19th.

So the plaster is due to come off anyway, in which case he has healed so why wouldn't you go?? Confused

I think it would be pretty shitty for the rest of the family who have also paid out a lot of money to meet you there.

TherapistInATabard · 30/11/2019 14:52

Oh and unless you’re planning on seeing a doctor out there I’d leave the cast on for whole trip, you shouldn’t be removing it yourself.

Windinmyhair · 30/11/2019 14:53

Don't put the cancellation of the holiday on him - especially as it is his first. He will be devastated. If the medical professionals are saying it is fine to fly.... it is fine to fly. That is what they do and why they train for so long to know these things.

Toddlerteaplease · 30/11/2019 15:13

The plaster isn't split so you can take it off. It's to
Allow room for any swelling.