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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To get upset about Xmas gift?

171 replies

MooPoo23 · 29/11/2019 22:55

Hi,

I was just wondering if I could have your opinion.

I don’t have much money this year (I left a dv relationship last year and still haven’t recovered financially) and thought it would be nice to “do up” my daughters room as an Xmas gift.

I mentioned it to someone at my local play centre (we were all taking Xmas) and she laughed it off and said “tbf that’s a bit of a shit gift”.

I laughed and said “yeah, it was just an idea” but I actually felt quite sad about it.

Am I bu to be upset or would it be ok to do this? I really don’t have much to give, I have about 6-7 gifts for my dd (she’s 6 and will be getting things from her dad and his family).

All I’ll be doing is paining it pink, putting a rug, some fairy lights, a few wooden plaques with quotes on them, some new bedding and a few cushions. It’s not much but it’s the best I can do right now.

I honestly feel like a shit mum, but I’m trying my hardest and I do work but only part time.

Thank you for reading my message x

OP posts:
Pierrettelasanguinaire · 30/11/2019 02:48

Your daughter will be thrilled, OP. Have a lovely Christmas together.

Toddlerteaplease · 30/11/2019 02:56

Up can get glitter to go
In paint......

Mummyoflittledragon · 30/11/2019 04:59

That’s a lovely idea. My dd had a new bed for her 7th birthday - we got her other things too. Your dd will love it!

Shooturlocalmethdealer · 30/11/2019 05:03

One of my favorite Christmas presents as a little girl was bedding. It was light blue with white dots and puppies on the comforter. I absolutely adored it! Your DD will love her room.

Igotthemheavyboobs · 30/11/2019 05:07

I.would have loved thataand as a child. Als0 stops you buying loads of cheap plastic crap from poundland just to bulk up the tree pile. Win-win!

Tetraread · 30/11/2019 05:22

I think it's an amazing idea, better than giving presents she will likely forget in time.

AaandBreathe · 30/11/2019 05:32

I think it's a lovely idea.

There is only one thing on my 7 year olds Christmas list - a bedding set!

billandbenflowerpotmen1 · 30/11/2019 05:47

Lovely idea. You are giving of your time and much thought has gone into the gift. IMO a much better gift than just buying some crap for the sake of it

Brefugee · 30/11/2019 06:00

I think it sounds like a lovely idea. Go for it!

Dollymixture22 · 30/11/2019 06:04

Awesome gift. Will make her feel very special.

Lots of my friends have done this, and it always goes down really well.

No idea why anyone would think it’s a shit present. Don’t doubt yourself beciase of one stupid woman😊😊

LellyMcKelly · 30/11/2019 06:09

I did this for my 11yo and 13yo this year and they absolutely loved it. I think the idea of wrapping up a few bits and pieces - cushion, picture, etc. is brilliant. Go for it - that mother was an idiot.

EleanorLavish · 30/11/2019 06:10

OP my 7yo son asked for posters for his wall and new wallpaper for x as this year! Go for it she will live it.

Apolloanddaphne · 30/11/2019 06:12

One of my friends did this for her DDs birthday when she was around 7 or 8 and she loved it. She did it over a weekend when she was at her dads and surprised her with it when she came back.

Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe · 30/11/2019 06:18

OP I think its a perfect prezzie. I am doing something similar this year for my dd who is 8 !! She is moving into a big bedroom as her brother is leaving home and she is so excited. She has had a crap room more a shoe box really and I want her to have a lovely bedroom finally and the space to have her toys out properly.We too are going fairy light mad and I am going to use the facebook selling sites and freecycle to furnish it.I hope to turn brown furniture into white or cream furniture with a bit of paint and elbow grease.I know mine will love it genuinely so I think your daughter would too.You sound like a lovely mum and your little girl sounds lucky to have you.Its a really thoughtful gift you are contemplating and the reasons you are doing it is out of love ..what could be a better gift than that? She will feel so happy and secure.Go for it ..its a fab idea.Wishing you both much happiness and a very happy christmas.

Mjlp · 30/11/2019 06:22

I think it's a lovely idea. You could even wrap the fairy lights, plaques, bedding etc up for her to open on Christmas day and then do the room together over the Christmas holiday.

cheesemumma · 30/11/2019 06:27

She's a twat. That's what I've asked for for xmas. I'm decorating the living room. So, bias, but I think it's a lovely present. Why dont you paint before xmas then wrap up the accessories so she can open xmas day. Brilliant gift.

christmasathome · 30/11/2019 06:30

Its a great present! I remember my (recently divorced single mother) doing the same for my brothers and i as children and we loved it so much. I got a my little pony room including one wall of mlp wall paper. I thought i was the bees knees 😂

CupoTeap · 30/11/2019 06:37

@MooPoo23 I left due to domestic abuse. Kids and a suitcase. When I got my house making the kids room nice massively important to me. When they've been through that upheaval you want them to have a nice, safe, room that is theirs. Do it she will love it.

I used eBay, freecycle and fb groups, as well as charity shops.

Your 'friend' has no understanding of what you've all been through. As well as poor social skills!

Also I understand about the time split. My situation meant I had no reason/evidence to prevent their father from seeing them. I knew that when I left. But I always explained as being able to dilute his influence and behaviour by having my time and that I can build their resilience and help them to see how you should be treated.

Reastie · 30/11/2019 06:37

Do it! She will love it! Ignore other Mum.

My dd gets excited about nice new knickers and toothbrush in her stocking, other Mum would scoff at that too I’m sure!

Goatinthegarden · 30/11/2019 06:44

My favourite thing to look at in the Argos catalogue as a child in the early 90s was the duvet cover section!! Grin

I had my room decorated a couple of times for my birthday as a child - loved it! Still remember being 7 and having the joy of chilling out with a book in a ‘new’ room, feeling super grown up because I had little tiny flowers on my wallpaper.

I think it’s a fab gift idea!

billybagpuss · 30/11/2019 06:49

We did it for our 2 dds one year. They then thought it was a Christmas thing and they’d get it every year. They loved it

EleanorShellstrop100 · 30/11/2019 06:53

She will LOVE it! So much better than a piece of plastic crap that she will get bored of in a few weeks. I think it’s an amazing idea! It’s better than a typical present imo - far better!

ThanksAllTheSame · 30/11/2019 06:56

We did up my DDs room for her birthday, never occurred to me that it would be anything other than lovely! Ignore that cow and enjoy making the room special with your DD. Congratulations on your fresh start.

ColdCottage · 30/11/2019 07:02

What a lovely idea. Ignore her.

mintich · 30/11/2019 07:13

I used to love having my room done up when I was little!