How to handle DD request for Christmas present I can't afford??

[BooHaa]

DD wants one of these carriages she has seen on YouTube, they cost £1200!! DD is 5 and she fully believes in Santa. How on earth do I distract her from wanting this or manage her expectations???

www.onbuy.com/gb/cars-and-trucks/disney-princess-24v-carriage-ride-on-pinkpurple~c2342~p16663510/?exta=gshp&stat=eyJpcCI6MTIzNC45OSwiZHAiOjAsImxpZCI6IjIyMDQzODEyIiwicyI6IjgiLCJ0IjoxNTc0OTQ4NzAwLCJibWMiOiIwLjAifQ==&lid=22043812&gclid=CjwKCAiA_f3uBRAmEiwAzPuaMw9cKSyEOLvYOL6A51wlwxWYkB5N6bf4OyIB75TKmZh7kN808VujtxoCbiIQAvD_BwE

All our presents come from Santa. Think I missed a trick there.

@Trebla I'm not sure I understand where your judgey attitude is coming from, as OP is very actively trying not to buy the toy 😂

Uhoh, you're in a tricky situation @BooHaa the little letter @BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz posted is cute, and I would go with that, also you say you have three children all together? Do you think it's possible that on Christmas morning with all the excitement and everyone opening their pressies it'll slip her mind?? 🤞

Well how is going to get that down the chimney anyway?

I would just say that Santa has to be fair to all children and it would be unreasonable for him to allow one child to have such an expensive present.

Years ago my DD asked for a large Sylvanian Families house. They were retailing new for a fortune so we got a great discontinued one on eBay. It was obvious from the packaging that it wasn't new, but our then 6YO DD just exclaimed "Oh, Santa recycles!" and was so happy with it.

how about a Little Tykes cosy coupe - it has a door, is plastic, and she can ride in it. And it's only approx £45

there must be a you tube video showing you how to make one out of loo roll tubes and fairy liquid bottles :)
Just say you can't afford it.

"All our presents come from Santa. Think I missed a trick there."

I have told this tale before, but I will tell it again.

When my nephew was little he went back to school after Christmas, and all the children were talking about what presents they got. He came home crying because he didn't get any presents from his parents, and all his friends did.

SIL had told her children that all Christmas presents came from Santa.

I know I annoyed MIL when I insisted on doing stockings only from Santa, and presents from people, but I wanted DD to learn to have the good manners to thank the people who had bought her presents.

What about this one I’ve bought it for my dd.

What I find sad is that there will be parents using their credit card to buy this tat and then getting huge bills that they can't pay next year, they'll still be paying for it next Christmas.
We never bought the big ticket items for Christmas, even if we could afford it, we didn't want the children to become accustomed to expensive presents, who knew what our financial future held.

@Mulhollandmagoo

"@Trebla I'm not sure I understand where your judgey attitude is coming from, as OP is very actively trying not to buy the toy 😂"

Because @Trebla is a typical self-righteous mother who likes to ooze superiority. This usually comes with a gigantic dose of hypocrisy. For someone who flies around for her job and frequently flies long haul to promote herself at events or drives her SUV for hours at a time to appear briefly on a news story, she has an absolute cheek! Saving the planet is only something these types of people do as part of an image but ultimately will carry out the most damaging acts for their own personal wealth and status.

Eating no meat cuts an individual’s carbon footprint by 820 kilograms of carbon dioxide (CO2) each year, on average, about four times the reduction they’d get by recycling as much as possible. (Emissions generated by eating meat result, in large part, from the large amounts of energy needed to grow, harvest, and process feed crops.) Foregoing one round-trip transatlantic flight each year would cut a person’s emissions of CO2 by 1600 kilograms. Getting rid of their car would reduce emissions by 2400 kilograms, or 2.4 metric tons. And by choosing to have one fewer child in their family, a person would trim their carbon footprint by a whopping 58.6 metric tons—about the same emissions savings as having nearly 700 teenagers recycle as much as possible for the rest of their lives.

I don't think she's coming back...

OP there's some on eBay for a lot less. Not quite the same but the same idea. Not sure if they're in budget but could be worth a look?

Always told my kids I pay for the gifts and wants brings them.

Santa only does stockings in my family.

When my children see something on YouTube they want but I don’t want to buy ( such as a giant Ryan’s you review egg). I say

Awww we can’t get those in this country sorry!! They have no idea what country the YouTuber is in so it works everytime.

There's not enough room on his sleigh for big presents.
Also, when they write their letter to Santa, remind them that it’s a Wish List not a Get List. That you don’t get all of it but you might get some of it. It worked with mine to avoid disappointment.

Only stockings here, our stockings are cut-down girls’ red tights, and children can only give three suggestions of things they’d like, accepting they may not magically appear. My favourite was the year my son asked for a blue and white swirly lollipop. That took some finding then buying multiples in case damaged in transit.
Every present under the tree is from a proper person.

Santa only brings stockings here too! I'd tell her it's too big for the stocking.

That's the sort of thing people go deep into debt for that gets played with half a dozen times and then gathers dust while eating play space.

Why not tell her those special big toys only go to special places where girls with no mummies and daddies go to live. Santa takes them only one great big toy and they have to share it?

Oh what a tangled web we weave.
This Santa business puts way to much pressure on parents.
Tell her the truth.

I often say I've spoken to Santa about these things. Maybe you could take the hit and you've asked him if he can bring a mini one because it won't fit in the house. Or you could say plastic is not good for the planet earth so santa can only deliver a small to medium sized gift. Or that his elves are too busy to build a big gift like that for every child, so there is a size limit.

All sorts of ways to get around this without 'ruining the magic'!

Just say Santa doesn’t bring big toys like that, and you can’t afford it to include it in your presents to her.

And get her off YouTube. Letting kids watch videos of other kids getting toys (especially ridiculously expensive ones) is never going to end well.

Of course kids will come up with Grand ideas of what they want. If we were told a story that some magic person could get us anything we want, we would do the same. It doesn't mean that they will be disappointed by getting something else, unless they were led to believe they will get it.

This seeming fear/anxiety that as parents we are letting out kids down by believing that we are traumatising them emotionally by not giving them the dream life is doing much more harm than good.

There is a massive gap between feeling let down and building emotional pain because of it, and just learning that we can't have everything we dream of in life.

Kids are a lot more naturally emotionally resilient than we give them credit for. Most can live happily with a 'no that's not possible' when given an alternative that is still something that elicit joy.

Kids will expect more and more and will get less and less pleasure for the simplest things in life if we give them too much from the start.

We do stocking toys only here, well actually a pillowcase. They always get at least one of the smaller things on their wish list. They have never queried why some of their friends get a bike or a Playstation from Santa and they don't. They are just excited to get a pile of stuff to unwrap. My DHs family do all presents from family with Santa as a glorified postman. I do all the present buying so we do it my way.

Having main presents from family makes it less of a blow when they no longer believe.

Why is it £1200 for a lump of plastic?!

Santa brings stockings not other presents. This present is too expensive for you to buy