To ask if metal concerts are safe for DD14

[wherearemypaintbrushes]

Hi all. DD14 interested in 'gothic' fashion (which mainly just consists of black lipsticks and band tees ) and she is into a band called Nightwish. For what I have seen they are a metal type band.

Apparently they are going on tour next year and she would like me to book tickets for when they do a concert in London in December! I would honestly really love her to experience concerts and I think it would be a good christmas present.

Though I'd like to ask about your experiences with metal band concerts, I really don't want to stereotype but i'd be afraid of violent people etc The band seems harmless enough and the lead singer does seem quite nice but I just want to ask if I should be worried. She is a shy girl but copes well with noises - would she be intimidated by other people? None of her friends at school really enjoy her taste in music so may not be able to bring a friend.

Silly concerns, I know. Please don't flame me as I was never into bands like these at her age

I suppose how safe it is will depend largely on the venue, the security and whether she wants a seat or to bob around in the mosh pit.

She'll be fine at a Nightwish gig. It's not heavy, more melodic. Been going to metal gigs since that age and I've never experienced any issues or felt unsafe. I hope she has a great time

Nightwish are one of my favouites bands.

However, lead singer is kind of delicate and is known for buggering off gslf-way through the set because she's 'unwell'.

As far as safety goes, I imagine she'll be safer there than with screaming Beeber fans.

Im assuming she’s going with friends.

A night wish concert will be fine. My experience of the alternative music scene is that people are nice and respectful.

Tell her to stay away from the mosh pit as she might get accidentally bashed.

Venues often state the age that people under 18 must have a seat not standing- in many places it's 14. Is she intending to.go entirely alone? Is she streetwise? Will you drop-off/pick-up from venue?

I know it’s many years ago but I used to work at the NEC. When Cliff Richard & Daniel O Donnell concerts went on sale it was every woman for herself. They’d trample their mother to be first in the queue. And the abuse if you didn’t have the seats they wanted. The heavy metal fans however were the nicest, politest patrons ever. Formed an orderly line and were so respectful.

Ah! Thank you. Would you recommend seating or mosh pit type area?

Seating.

@bintang I'd go with her. Looked at the website and it said that 14-15's can stand if accompanied by an adult. I think she'd prefer to be closer but I don't know.

Nightwish are a pretty huge Finnish band with orchestral elements and they are playing large venues (wembley) etc so she will be fine. It will be well staffed and she will be looked out for. Will you be going with her?

I’ve been into metal for over 20 years and the large venues are a lot safer than that small gritty clubs etc.

Nightwish absolutely fine. Metal fans tend to be very polite. DH once dropped his glasses at a metal gig and all the fans formed a chain around where he had dropped them until he found them.

I would personally stay out of the mosh pit though! Not for me.

Honestly I've been knocked out at a gig and was well taken care of and lifted out of a mosh pit to safety by others, they're the nicest people and if there's a teenage girl in my experience everyone will keep an eye out for her.
Just tell her to avoid pits and she'll be fine!
I agree with another poster she's safer there than at a Bieber concert.

Oh - thank you. How old will they all be? Not to spam you all with questions

as in will I look like a bad mum for taking her there

She’ll be fine but I wouldn’t recommend the mosh pit.

Assuming you'll go with her, then no problem at all. I've gone to metal concerts since I was 16, and my ds has been going since he was 11 and no problems at all as long as you stay out of the mosh pit till you know what you are doing

I've been to many metal concerts from around the age of 13 and she will be looked after much better than if she went to a pop equivalent.

People are considerate of others (especially those who are more vulnerable) if it is known they don't want to be partaking in mosh pits or the like.

I've had a nice band of unknown guys standing around me as a barricade from the mosh pit that started behind us, making sure I wasn't getting hurt.

I've seen a pram with a young child in at a Rammstein gig which was given a wide berth.

The metal community, for all its stereotypes, are one of the most welcoming and friendly.

This is all so helpful!! Thank you

You'll notice that metal/alternative gigs have a huge age range - everyone from teens to pensioners! That's what makes them so great. Really diverse. Especially with a band like Nightwish. She'll absolutely love it and you'll be the coolest mum ever to take her

I'm into all different kinds of music. Metal fans are some of the most easygoing, non violent fans there are. Just tell her to stay out of the mosh pit! That's the only place she might (accidentally) getting hit.

I was at a Little Mix concert when some parents accused other parents of pushing in front of their kids, security had to be called as it kicked off!

The heavy metal fans however were the nicest, politest patrons ever. Formed an orderly line and were so respectful.

This is interesting. All the press i used to hear about the crazy metal-heads chucking bottles of piss around the crowd! I'm a crazy metal-head too but only in the safety of my own home and the only piss i ever throw about is in DS's used pants!! Sorry tmi!

The Heavy Metal family have always, in my experience, embraced other metal fans of all ages. I'm not into Nightwish myself, but I've taken younger children (6+) to other gigs and always found other fans welcoming and concerned for my and the DC's safety.

A quick Google suggests the venue is Wembley arena which is very hot on safety and security (I was there last Friday). Her age may require her to be seated, which is a good way to experience a first "big" gig because you're likely to be able to see the band and she'll be secure but still able to be part of the crowd. The metal gig I was at last Friday (Ghost) had families in the audience and metal fans tend to genuinely reflect all ages. I saw kids as young as 6 and adults in their 70s.

If you choose to let her go, I hope she has a great time. Your first gig is very special.

wear - I'd love for her to think of me as a cool mum for once!! Thanks all

This tmi made me chuckle @BooseysMom

You sound like a fab mum, OP!