To not understand how this is cultural appropriation?

[NewUsername18382828]

Namechanged for this.
DH and I decided to give DD (who is now 6) a name which is originally from another country. Neither of us have relatives or any connection there, we just liked the name. There is an English variant of the name but we didn't like the sound of it as much so went with the one we liked most. Didn't think it would be a problem, a name is a name.

Well anyway, a mum of a girl in DD's class at school was born in that country. She heard me call DD at the gates and started talking to me about her name. She was asking what our ties were to the country, and so on. When I said there weren't any and we just liked the name, she muttered something about cultural appropriation and left with her child. Fast forward another couple of weeks and I've just been informed by another parent that she's been badmouthing us, saying we shouldn't use a foreign name when we have no ties to the country, it's cultural appropriation.

AIBU to have no clue how this is cultural appropriation? I always thought a name was just a name.

I guess it is cultural appropriation in the broadest sense.
But lots of people use names with origins in other countries. There are very few truly 'english' names.

It depends on the name as well I guess...e.g. Mohammad for a non-muslim would be an odd choice.

I cant offer anything here but im really interested in peoples opinions on this topic so want to follow

I think she’s being completely over dramatic. Ignore it, you offend someone just by breathing these days.

I don't think it's cultural appropriation, but I do think it's odd to use a name from a different language and culture.
The child will spend her life saying "No, I'm not Greek/Norwegian/Nigerian" or whatever.

Is it Jacques?

What's the name?

Of course you can't understand because it isn't and nor should you try to tie yourself into knots trying to do so.

Don't be intimidated by this shite. Borrow a bit of cultural appropriation from the Anglo Saxon and tell her to fuck off.

Job done.

My children have names from European countries to which I have no ties. I’ve never been accused of anything. Can I ask what the country is?

If the name has an English variant it is unlikely to be unique from that one country, it is going to be a Judeo Christian name, like biblical names where Matthew is Matthias in German. In this specific case, I would not consider it cultural appropriation. If it was a unique dialect word, yes it would a tad strange but nothing to bad mouth about really.

Wait it’s a daughter (need sleep)

Is it Beau?

Whether or not its cultural appropriation depends (like racism) on power differences between the two countries.

Did you pick a name from a country that is historically oppressed by country you live in? That was colonized? If a person from that country, called the same name, lived in the UK, would they likely be the victim of discrimination and racism? If the answer to any of these might be yes: then it is cultural appropriation.

So if you're talking about, for instance, an English person using a French name, then no: it's a bit odd, but not cultural appropriation. A white English person using a traditional Nigerian name, when they have no connection to Nigeria but picked because they thought it sounded pretty? Definitely both odd and cultural appropriation.

I think it depends on how mainstream the name is - Chloe for example is historically French but well enough used in the UK that it wouldn't immediately been seen as a 'French' name.

And also depends on the culture the name comes from. My understanding of cultural appropriation is that if a culture has faced oppression and discrimination and then someone who has no understanding of this comes along and steals a name etc then that's different to using a name from a culture that hadn't been typically oppressed.

I do know a South African called jacqueline (jack a lynn) who pronounces her name the French style (jah coo lin ) and while it’s naff, wouldn’t consider it cultural appropriation exactly. If you were calling her Beyoncé’ maybe

I do cringe a bit when people use for example a welsh or Irish name without the ability to pronounce it correctly. It’s borderline insulting I think when it’s used incorrectly and with no links to the country.

My friend recently named her baby DD Aoife, which is an Irish name (I believe Eva / Evie could be English versions?). But my friend loved the name and the spelling. A mutual friend said something to me along the lines of.. she shouldn't have gone with a traditional Irish name since neither her or her partner are Irish.
I didn't think that much of the comment at the time but afterwards thought it was odd. Why can't you just appreciate a beautiful name?

medium.com/@luces.sdma/cultural-appropriation-power-dynamics-in-practice-70065e970113

"Put in another way, cultural appropriation is the picking apart and stealing of a culture and using it for one’s mindless pleasure and benefit. It is having the power to chose the “pleasant” parts of a culture without having to deal with the discrimination and obstacles that come with it. ...People of that appropriated culture have no choice but to experience the good AND the bad of their entire culture."

Probably going to get slated for this but I think what you’ve chosen to call your DD is none of her business and she should get off her high horse.

I disagree with CA as a concept.
Unless something is othering, fetishising, insensitive or exploitative, or just incorrect in which case it should be challenged on those grounds it’s a meaningless concept.

It is cultural appropriation but I don't think all cultural appropriation is bad. It depends whether or not you are appropriating something from an oppressed group.

Is the name sacred in the culture, or does it have special significance? Are the British known for colonising the country?

If by using the name your daughter is subverting their culture then I’m not clear where the damage is being seen? Cultural appropriation does not mean using something from another culture, there has to be some element of exploitation by the dominant of the subject.

I meant ‘unless’ not ‘if’

@Etinox how edgy /s

I love the names aoife & Siobhan...am Aussie Italian so those names wouldn’t suit my last name but am a stickler for traditional spelling. I would have thought a bastardised version of the name would be more insulting !

Still hoping to hear what the name in question is

So you are choosing a name that you think is beautiful for the most precious person in your life and this is somehow wrong ??????
The worlds gone fucking mad

So...if you are English or of English descent, you can only use English names???!!!
Get the fuck outta here!
I don't get this logic. It's great different names are being adopted from different cultures and nationalities, if that makes sense. It breaks down barriers, IMO.
I'm half Arab and have a Hebrew name. My DD has an, historically, Greek name that has become very traditional in places such as Britain, Spain, Russia etc.