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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that it's easy to look immaculate, be super organised and have a show home if you've got lots of money?

78 replies

Prinny1 · 24/11/2019 19:26

An acquaintance of mine is always lauded by others in our social circle as being so organised, immaculately presented with immaculate kids and a show home for a house, as if she is some kind of super human goddess.

When in reality she, and others I've known that are similar to her, all have plenty of money.

It's easy to be organised when you don't have to do any cleaning as you have a cleaner. And you have a part time nanny to look after the kids.

It's easy to hold amazing dinner parties when you hire a chef to cook the food for the party.

It's easy to look immaculate when you have a large budget for hair, beauty treatments, personal trainers and clothes.

It just annoys me a bit that this woman is totally put on a pedestal as being amazing when it's all down to money really as she married someone wealthy. She only has to put something very mundane on social media such as taking the kids to the park and everyone comments saying what an inspiration she is and how lucky her kids are.

She is currently packing for a holiday that they are going on in a few weeks and keeps posting about it, to be told how amazing and organised she is. But surely it's easy to be organised and get packed early when you just buy a total new holiday wardrobe each time you go away; all you have to do is chuck the clothes in the case?!

OP posts:
glasshalfsomething · 24/11/2019 19:38

Your post certainly has an undertone of jealousy, and for that YABU. It doesn’t sound like the woman has done anything in particular to upset you; but you’re upset by other people opinions. Is it because you care about what they think you?

BingoLittlesUncle · 24/11/2019 19:45

Richest guy I know (title as well) is as scruffy as hell. He's organised but his house is no show home (lots of dogs), so no, I don't think it does make it easy.

TimeforanotherChange · 24/11/2019 19:46

I think it's easier. Easier to have a show home, yes, if you have a cleaner and throw money at decorators.

Easier to look good? Hmm...I eat too much chocolate. I don't think being rich would solve that. I'm not keen on going to the gym - even if I had massive amounts of time and a rich husband. I suspect I'd still be my old, hefty self.

Yesmate · 24/11/2019 19:46

Jealous much?

Jeschara · 24/11/2019 19:47

What you say is true,but you do sound jealous. Not a attractive quality. Worry about what you are doing not what she is up too.

WineGummyBear · 24/11/2019 19:48

Social media is a load of nonsense.

Who posts pictures of their packing for a holiday in three weeks time?
Who fawns over such pictures?
Who cares about any of the above?

BackforGood · 24/11/2019 19:48

Of course it is easier if you have money to throw at all mundane tasks, but not sure why you are giving this headspace ?
You are clearly very jealous and if any post on social media winds you up, then why not defriend her on social media ?

WineGummyBear · 24/11/2019 19:50

But to answer your question YANBU.

megletthesecond · 24/11/2019 19:51

Of course it is.
Just take her Instagram nonsense with a pinch of salt.

1Morewineplease · 24/11/2019 19:52

Pure jealousy.
Block her, if only to stop feeling like this.

Isaididont · 24/11/2019 19:53

YANBU especially about the home. If you can afford a cleaner, you can spend the time you’d usually spend on cleaning on organising...

ChocolateOrangeIsAFruit · 24/11/2019 19:53

You sound very jealous

CountFosco · 24/11/2019 19:54

Of course it makes it easier if you want to live in a certain way because you can afford the help. Even if you want to have a scruffy range rover full of dogs and dress like a tramp that is easier with money because you will be viewed as an eccentric whereas someone poor living a similar lifestyle will be viewed as chaotic.

Meshy23 · 24/11/2019 19:55

You do sound a bit jealous but it’s probably understandable.

To be honest I’m on mat leave and had an image of being ultra tidy with an ideal hone house, being an amazing cook, walking out with immaculate clothes and hair, a body to die for and obviously being a fabulous mum and wife to boot.

I try my best in all aspects and have a cleaner but I still walk out of the house with semi brushes hair with vomit on it most days.

This woman is probably well off and has help but she must still be really organised and still probably works efficiently and hard to manage everything at once- so hats off to her to be honest

Happyandglorious · 24/11/2019 19:56

Isn't announcing a holiday on sm just an invitation to be burgled?

caperberries · 24/11/2019 19:56

Well I've got plenty of money, so what's my excuse?

OhHellllooooo · 24/11/2019 19:58

Unless she's just been handed/inherited the money... how easy was it for her or DH to earn it? Does one/ both have demanding jobs?

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 24/11/2019 20:00

If she is presenting herself as effortlessly organised whilst actually outsourcing most of the drudgery to others then YANBU.

If she is saying that she is lucky to live the lifestyle she does then YABU.

LaurieMarlow · 24/11/2019 20:00

It is easier. For sure.

But I wouldn’t put too much store on social media comments. People bleat all kinds of rubbish on SM. I doubt they even take it seriously themselves. Block her if it gets too annoying. Life’s too short to be upset by this stuff.

Userzzzzz · 24/11/2019 20:02

How rich are you talking? Because we’re a high income family and we are spinning many plates and very rarely look immaculate. You do sound jealous- she doesn’t really sound like she’s done anything to deserve your resentment. It does sound like she has some overly sychophantic followers on social media. Holiday packing isn’t exactly rocket science.

OrangeZog · 24/11/2019 20:03

Jealously won’t do you any favours. What a lot of people put on social media is a tiny snapshot; it often has no bearing at all on how good or enjoyable a time they are having.

GrumpyHoonMain · 24/11/2019 20:07

Really depends on what your cleaner does. The kind who come daily rarely do more than light cleaning - so if she is home based your friend probably does a hec of a lot of tidying / deep cleaning to make things look like a show home. You need to remember that rich women who also have big high profile jobs don’t get to their level by compromising their standards - I know a lot of wealthy women who come home at 10pm, cook home cooked food. and if they find the state of the house unacceptable clean straight into the night.

rattusrattus20 · 24/11/2019 20:14

stupid posting about her holidays so far in advance, it'd serve her right if those posts found their way onto 'burglarnet' or equivalent'.

billy1966 · 24/11/2019 20:25

I honestly think people posting on SM about packing for a holiday repeatedly, beyond dull.

I can't imagine bothering with people like that.

I think that people who do that kind of thing on SM are really lacking, and have empty lives at their core.

fascinated · 24/11/2019 20:26

I am no great fan of organised religion but there was probably a good reason that Vanity was one of the seven deadly sins, when you see the amount of Angst that all this showing off on SM causes now! Honestly, it is self absorbed nonsense.

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