to put rules in place for employee with second job?

[Figamol]

Very long story short!

After 3 traumatic years in the state system, we pulled the money (and blood and limbs) together to put our special needs child in a private school with a one on one funded by us. We found a great girl and its going so well - one of the main reasons we hired her was because she insisted it would be her only job, which was great for our child as it meant she had the flexibility to adapt to his changing needs and we had the possibility to give her extra hours if he was having a bad day or school outing etc..

I coached another parent at the school who now also needs a one on one on how we found her, what we put in place and offered to help her.
Turns out the parent then approached our own one on one to do some hours with her child.

I'm very protective over what we have now managed to put in place. But there's not much we can do about that as of course she can accept more hours outside of her contract with us if she wants. But as our contract hours will be more than double than the child she takes on - practically we want to make sure things run smoothly and there are no blurred lines. Putting in place support isn't an exact science and needs can change at any given moment for any reason and joint supervision would not work (different ages/needs etc) She has assured us our own child is the priority so I'd love feedback on the following ideas:

Law dictates breaks - if her other hours mean the total working day changes the breaks required - these additional breaks will not happen during the hours contracted to us.
No preparation for, conversations about, emails or meetings will happen about the other child during the hours contracted to us.
There will be no interaction (as much as possible)/joint supervision of the other child during hours contracted to us.
If there are special events/trips - she must make herself available for for our child.
We reserve the right to change her hours to fit our child's needs.
At the start of the school year, she must not fix her hours for other children until our child's need have been defined. This could take up to 4 weeks.
She should also be available for more hours during the 'Back to school' phase until he is settled (this often means full days in the beginning.)

I also wanted to know what happens legally if she is injured during her other contract time? What rights do we have to protect our own child's needs during that time.

Thanks in advance to those who might be able to give input into what is/isn't reasonable.

Sorry OP, if you handed me that list of demands I’d probably hand you my notice.

I think the flexibility one is probably reasonable given the nature of the role. But she already seems to have agreed to that.

You sound a bit obsessed with this lady meeting your child's needs and your child's needs only. It doesn't come across well at all. I get that it was a bit shitty of the other mum to approach your child's support worker but, if you were paying her well enough for all she does (and it seems like you expect a hell of a lot from her), then she wouldn't need to take on additional hours would she?

Offer her a full time contract.

You either need to pay her for the hours you want her to work or let her plan her own life. You can’t tell her she can’t work somewhere else on the off chance that you want her - if those trips / settling in sessions are outside of her contracted hours then you cannot tell her she must be available to do them.

Also,the only way to Reserve the right to change the hours etc would be to pay her for full time hours even if you don’t need them . That way she could leave herself free to be on call if you need her

Try and think of how it would feel if your employer gave you these rules.
Suffocated comes to mind.

I get that you’re anxious but this is ridiculously controlling.

You need to treat her with respect and trust that she is capable of managing both roles. I presume you do trust her as she is doing such a great job. You should be pleased for her that someone else has recognised her skills.

It’s like you want all the benefits of a full time employee without having to pay for it.

Thanks - your comments are really helpful and in line with what I thought.

No we dont want to lose her which is why I guess I shared my over protectiveness here first. Its good to be put straight - tough as it is to hear.

If you want her to work for you full time then you need to pay her accordingly. If she is working part time then you need to accept that she is free to work for other people.

The first three conditions are fine. The rest of them are not in your control.

What outcome are you looking for if your employee breaks any of these rules? Based on your post I’m assuming you’re looking for ways to keep her, not to engineer an excuse to fire her, in which case I think any ‘rules’ you put in place should benefit her for working with your child rather than punishing her for working with another family. E.g. She might comply with your request to prioritise you for events/holidays etc out of loyalty, but might want an on-call or retainer fee in order to keep her hours open.

You might get some ideas about what is reasonable by looking at nanny-share arrangements and how these handle varying hours/different family requirements.

I agree with everyone else, too onerous. The only way forward I can see is to contract her and pay her FT hours for your child, to take her out of the market for a second job.

PS we pay her REALLY well, with all benefits and she even gets more holiday that we're contracted to give her. The other family will be paying less. We are good employers - anxiety just got control. I can see how to make this transition smoother and more respectful now.

Oh my, I do the same job as your carer and I certainly would be feeling uncomfortable and searching for another job if the list you've written was laid on me. Care work is not well paid, she should be allowed to increase her income if the opportunity presents itself. Most carers I know have more than one person they care for, it makes life more financially secure. If she is as great as you say, I have no doubt she will act professionally within the context of her job role and contract

You talk about her like a possession. Like a servant that you own. If I was her I'd take the other job and run leave your employment. Honestly you are being controlling and on some of those points, downright abusive.

Also, if she is old enough to have a qualification
and be working with children, she's a grown woman, not a girl.

You can't 'block' her hours but you can agree on set hours.
I have 3 jobs and if 1 employer tried to dictate in this way I would only have 2 jobs.
I make the choices in my life that fit around my life/ pay etc not an employer.

Well done OP for hearing the comments and changing your plans. Not easy and not what everyone does.

How many hours do you pay her for now typically?

I'd walk away pretty bloody quick if someone tried to pin those terms on me. If you want her to be available for extra hours on your terms, you need to be looking at a significant retainer fee.

I'd just be honest, say how much you value her and how much of a difference she's made to your DD, and that you're just feeling a little concerned that she's going to be torn in two directions now she's working with another child.

Paying her full time doesn’t necessarily take her out of the job market does it? She’s still got those hours free to take on more work if she wants.

If she’s agreed your child takes priority, I think you just have to respect get and trust her to be able to manage the workload. If it becomes an issue, deal with it then.

Regarding the breaks, look at it this way. If I work 4 hours then I'm not entitled to a break. If I work 8 hours then I am.

So why if I have a job in a shop and then a job in a pub next door. I work 4 hours in the shop and then I go to my 4 hour shift at the pub. Can I tell the pub "I will be taking my break before I start, since I've already worked 4 hours today"? No, I can't. If you choose to have more than one job and the hours add up, you're not entitled to a break from either because each of them has given you a 4 hour shift. What you do before and after your shift is totally up to you.
So talk to her about breaks just to make sure she realises she's doing two jobs as opposed to a continuous shift of 8 hours or whatever.

But anything else our of your contracted hours is nothing to do with you. You cannot block her time off unless you pay her full time. In your contract with her, you have it written that she must attend school trips? How much notice does the contract specify you need to give of school trip attendance? As long as stick to that notice period, like telling her 2 weeks before any trips where she is required, then you should be fine. But maybe ask her her it will work on practice if the other child has regular hours with her.

If you want to control all her working hours you need to pay her full time.

Are you in a position to offer her an enhanced contract that means she doesn’t need to take this second job? It sounds like you need exclusivity which you’ll have to pay for to be reasonable.

I knew I would get honest feedback which is what I needed to make sure I keep my anxiety in control and don't jeopardise what we've managed to do for him. We have a great relationship with her and now I can keep it that way! :)

The OP has taken on all the suggestions and comments here, is prepared to work with her child's support worker to find a solution and is still getting piled on. Leave her alone! Good luck, OP, it now sounds like you really care about your employee and want to do the best for her whilst still prioritising your child.