Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

only odd men join organisations like the Masons

221 replies

GoodGriefSunshine · 19/11/2019 19:22

Maybe I have just been unfortunate but the only men I have ever met that belonged to the Masons (...Rotary etc) have been kind of odd. Let's just say, not attractive to women types. Mummy's boys, odd-bods who are into train spotting and sci-fi in too big a way. The kind of men you feel may be a little on the boring side. What sort of men join these predominantly men's clubs and what is appealing about wearing aprons and performing bizarre rituals?

OP posts:
PositiveVibez · 19/11/2019 21:44

At the lower levels Masonic Lodges might present as 'charitable drinking clubs', but at the higher levels they are corrupt and corrupting, and your average 'jo mason' will never get there

Yes to this. The corruptions in the 'high up' ranks is sickening.

Think domestic abuser never getting charged after being in court on numerous occasions because his dad's a mason. Oh and guess what. A lot of judges are too!!

One of my relatives is in the masons an average Joe mason though.

He is your typical, well of, white, middle aged xenophobic bigot.

He thinks the masons are great.

PositiveVibez · 19/11/2019 21:45

*off

BillywilliamV · 19/11/2019 21:47

You almost certainly won't know who is in the Masons and who isn't. They dont generally shout about it.
My FIL is quite high up in the organisation, he is the kindest, most normal man you could hope to meet, though he was very disappointed that DH refused to join.

StoneofDestiny · 19/11/2019 21:50

You are not allowed to be a mason in a number of professions. Some organisations were (are) rife with corruption due to Masonic 'networks'.

People can work for and contribute to charity without be in the masons!
There is a lot of denial or ignorance on here about the corrupt side of masonry. Some people's careers have been unjustly progressed because of their membership of The Brotherhood (and of course some have been held back because there were not masons). There have been a number of investigations into Masonic activities.

Mrsgogginsthe3rd · 19/11/2019 21:53

My FIL is a Mason he can be a bit of a dick but for none of the reasons you’ve mentioned. Think you’re way off the mark. Most of the members of his lodge are wealthy successful business owners. There’s a lot of police as well. And an ex butler to the queen. FIL is definitely not a Mummy’s boy he’s a well known ‘face’ in their town and whilst he does a lot for charity he was once considered a bit of hard man - he’s still barred form the Bowling Club for getting into an argument and giving someone a Glasgow kiss, this was about 25 years ago! There’s a lot of raffle chat though which can get a bit tedious.

PooWillyBumBum · 19/11/2019 21:53

DH’s grandfather was a grand master (whatever that is!?) in the masons and seemed normal enough to me. I know a couple of people who are members of the local rotary and they are not exactly young, sexy clubbing enthusiasts but also not particularly “odd” (and there are women members too!)

Those saying these organisations attract those who struggle in a “normal setting” to make friends may well be right...but one could say the same about all us weirdos who post anonymously on a forum...

namechange4052 · 19/11/2019 21:54

My ex is a Freemason and also a massive twat. Him and his mason mates are all misogynists who belittle women and think of them as being beneath them. They didn't seem to raise any money for charity, they just used anything they raised to benefit one another (I asked one for examples when I was 'allowed' to attend the 'ladies ball' 🙄). All they seemed to achieve was a school dinner 3 course meal once a month, whilst feeling full of their own self-importance as they were wearing suits, learn their lines from their little book, then come home drunk to 'the ball and chain'. At one ladies night, one did a speech thanking 'the ladies for ironing our shirts all year round'. I found it hilarious that only my ex could buy my drinks at these 'balls' and I couldn't buy my own, whilst meanwhile in the real world I was paying the mortgage and bills on my own 🖕🏻

RaymondStopThat · 19/11/2019 21:54

The Masons I've known were all police officers as it was the best way to ensure promotion back them. No idea if it's different now

Ragwort · 19/11/2019 21:55

I agree Billy, it’s impossible to know who is or isn’t a Mason. I volunteer with a charming man at our Food Bank, he is a pacifist, a really inspiring man with a wide range of interests, clearly cares deeply for the people we volunteer with and I was amazed when he told me he was a Mason.

The ‘image’ of the Masons probably doesn’t do them any favours.

steff13 · 19/11/2019 21:59

GoodGriefSunshine the website says you have to believe in a supreme being, but you don't have to be a specific religion.

Solihooley · 19/11/2019 22:00

Sounds like some lodges are more reputable than others. It’s been well known for a long time that masonry has caused or facilitated a lot of corruption in the police force, and possibly still does. For that reason alone I’m highly suspicious of it as an organisation. But I’m sure most members are perfectly nice normal men.

WhoWants2Know · 19/11/2019 22:00

I don't have an issue with the Masons or Rotary as mainly single sex gatherings designed for networking and charity, any more than I would with the WI or indeed, a knitting group.

Sometimes it's just nice to hang out with members of one's own sex, and if it benefits charity then even better!

StoneofDestiny · 19/11/2019 22:01

Just google 'corruption in the masons' or similar and see just how many investigations have been held into them in the police, banking, army and civil service.
Rotary Clubs are in a different league to Masonry.

Nolongeranovice · 19/11/2019 22:02

It's just scouts for grown ups Grin

I admit I haven't RTFT but my view of the masons, after knowing two members were that they were absolutely loaded and were either MDs or GMs of massive international companies. Read into that what you will...🤷🏼‍♀️

Slp40 · 19/11/2019 22:03

It's quite funny reading all these negative absurd posts about the masons. Unless your involved in it, you will never know what they actually do. You have these misguided views of the masons because you know nothing about the truth other than myths and rumours. If the masons were so secret, they wouldn't have let cameras in and film a masonic documentary.

IAcceptCookies · 19/11/2019 22:09

Do you have to be religious to be accepted? I thought you had to be some kind of religious but not any specific religion. So Jewish, Christian, Muslim...

So, in fact OP, you know very little about the masons, yet you feel adequately informed to start a bitching thread? Confused

I know two masons, one was my boss until recently. They were both kind, lovely successful men.
I don’t see the problem with the silly rituals and aprons: it’s just customs and traditions of their institution. We have judges and barristers with their silly wigs and gowns, guides with their church parades and salutes, black rod and the lord chancellor... all sorts of royal protocols and ponced up courtiers. Lots of people dress up and perform rituals. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Bezalelle · 19/11/2019 22:09

I think it's pretty obvious that the charity work is a cover for other activities. If not, why wouldn't they just be a charity?

Sure, your sweet old dad or Uncle Tom might be a member, but the higher ranks seem dodgy as hell.

Troels · 19/11/2019 22:09

The only Rotary men I know are very successful business men and extreamly snobby, well the wives were.

SadForNoReason · 19/11/2019 22:16

The oddest people I know are on mumsnet ...

IHateWashingUp2 · 19/11/2019 22:17

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/the-satanic-brotherhood-with-clergymen-in-its-ranks-133468.html%3famp
That outlines some of the reasons evangelical Christians, and some from other religions too, see the Masons as so much more than a charity or private club. I agree with bezalelle. Yes they do good works, but they are a world away from the Rotarians.

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 19/11/2019 22:18

Haha Can tell here whose DHs or DFs or whomever are Masons

I have no idea about the lower tier though and perhaps they do do good things .
I agree with a PP about favourtisim and people getting off serious charges as judge is a Mason, like they are etc . Its plain wrong.

BathshebaKnickerStickers · 19/11/2019 22:19

It is extremely important for mental health and wellbeing that men have supportive social networks.

My husband loves football and snooker and his things are to go to the football with his friends and play snooker with his friends.

Not everyone is into sport.

Not everyone cares about sport or can do sport.

Yet sporting things are the natural thing trotted our for men to easily create a support network.

Churches are good too...

And rotary clubs, and masons and photography clubs and book groups and trade associations and the like are all perfectly reasonable things for men to join to get that support network and outlet.

Big thing in Scotland at the moment is the “Men’s Shed” network - amazing idea to get
Men together with an easy focus and a massive deal for their mental health

Peoplenstuff · 19/11/2019 22:19

OP I think the question is rather bigoted.

JeffreeStar · 19/11/2019 22:21

If that’s what you think then fair enough, I prefer to reserve judgment on things I have experienced. I grew up with a father and grandfather in the masons. It’s not for everyone but they write perfectly normal.

RaymondStopThat · 19/11/2019 22:21

. It’s been well known for a long time that masonry has caused or facilitated a lot of corruption in the police force, and possibly still does

That's certainly been my experience. Particularly in terms of promotion. I also heard of masons getting off some minor offences through fellow masons who were police officers and know of one case personally where that happened. As I said, it may be different now, I hope so.