To hate homemade gifts

[Bearbehind]

New thread with the vote enabled this time!

Unless the giver is actually good enough at making what ever it is to sell then I wish they just wouldn’t give homemade stuff, especially food

Fortunately I don’t generally receive them but I have a friend who’s a teacher who’s inundated with them at Christmas

It just seems such a waste as it pretty much all gets binned

Myshitisreal Thank you! Not a particularly good photo (l still had to do the border and sew the ends in) but you get the idea.

I voted YABU. I don’t generally make my own gifts. But I do have my own business selling something I make so I do gift my ‘product’ to certain people at times, if I know they’ll like that is!

But in general I don’t care what I get because it’s the thought that counts. I’m not well off by any means but I don’t really want for much. I don’t want for anything that can be bought for Christmas anyway.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Love that! What a lovely, personal present. l would love some needlefelted rabbits like mine.

SDTG Those dogs are beautiful! I love needle felted animals some people are incredibly skilled. I tried it once and I just bled all over the wool.

That is just awesome, I better not show my husband or he will want one. I assume its made up of grey white and black squares. Wow!!!! Such talent on this thread 😍

There’s clearly a mismatch in what is meant by different people about handmade/homemade gifts. I’ve never received any random scrabble letter things or similar that people are describing. Only ever something for me with my personal taste in mind.

If someone's made me a present it means they thought about me all the time they were making it. How can you get better than that?

Myshitisreal lt's just crocheted squares, stitched together to make the design. Nothing difficult or complicated if you can crochet. lt just takes time!

Oh. I always make gifts for my friends and family. I make marrons glacé, jars of chutney and jams, fruit cakes, and soaps. I put in tonnes of effort, I totally disagree it’s lazy. I do give purchased gifts as well but I like making things for people. It makes me feel Christmassy and they always get eaten or used. Maybe my friends and family are kinder than you.

It's all very well if it's something the receiver wants. My sister in law crochets is all presents each year. It's a running joke as in about six years we have never received anything that we actually liked or would use. I would just rather she didn't bother.

It seems a lot of people missed the part where I said unless the giver is actually good at that craft

Many have understood I’m talking about those who do it to save money whilst not actually having any skill in said craft and it not being to the receivers taste

Wouldn’t most people rather not receive anything in those instances?

“ It's all very well if it's something the receiver wants.”

But that applies to all presents!

The other thing about someone making you something that's not very good and you don't really want is you need to be effusive in your praise, you need to go far and above what you'd do with a shop bought thing,

You need to lie through your teeth and tell them how wonderful it is, how impressed you are, how you can't wait to use it, or even crack it open then and there, or wear it immediately, and then the next time you see them you also need to tell them how fabulous it was and you can't get enough of it.

You need to go well out your way to make them feel good about it, because you know they made it, and the more shit it is, the more effusive you need to be. With shop bought gifts you don't have the same issue to the same level.

I’m on the fence.

If the gifts are well thought out and made to a really high standard then great.

My mum keeps giving me home made scarves and I really don’t like them. There’s no thought there either it’s just she’s practicing and giving them to me. I threw out 12 scarves last year and they were nearly identical. I had to say to her when I was expecting DD “only one or two homemade items only”

I would love someone to make me some home made jams and chutneys though assuming they were hygienic...

oh And once you've done the effusive praise, the giver then actually believes they have a skill and you're in for a life time of it,,,

I voted YANBU but I crochet decent weird stuff and it sounds like you and your friend have been on the shit end of some crappy home made "gifts". shudders

It totally depends on what is made and who its for.

I had a gorgeous HUGE food hamper years ago from my adult Godson and his girlfriend which was packed with homemade jams and pickles, flavoured booze and beautiful biccies and sweets all in little mason jars. All where hand made. They wanted to say thank you to their family for supporting them as they saved for their flat and wanted to try their skills in their new kitchen. I was so chuffed they thought of me as family I admit I blubbed a lot. (and everything was delish)

My mates and family only get something if they ask for it or they've been dropping heavy hints about something ("Getaway.. look at this pic! shoves it in my face I wonder if you could make something like that..... I'd love it..." hint hint)

I've made intricate snowflake garlands (in fine cotton thread and TINY crochet hooks which you then have to stiffen the finished object one by one - took fecking ages!), retro xmas decorations, Pokemon/ Disney themed things, baby blankets, chrimbo wreaths and Halloween stuff. If someone asks for something, I'll make it for them.

They used to ask for things I could find patterns for online but now the buggers ask for more complicated things where there are no patterns to even buy! (ever made something with no pattern and just have to go from pics or film stills and have OCD when it comes to getting things looking right? Bloody hell that can takes ages!)

yesterday I had a text from my friend I spend Xmas day with from her teenage kids with their crochet toy requests for this year, one is 15 and the other 17... (zombie themed)

My mantra is "if I'm not happy having what I've made in my house for people to see then no one is going to be subjected to it"

Thing is when I started crocheting I was shittier than shit, hell my granny squares weren't even square!

Only a LOT of practice and mild OCD "it must look like the picture/ animal/ model" madness have I gotten good enough where mates and kin want something from me. I would never have made them have the burden of wonky blankets and distressed deformed toys in the beginning... I love them all too much!

But I've had some shitty thoughtless "off the shelve" chrimbo pressies in my time. The worst was years and years of random cheap shit such as a tiny pointless handbags, marked down books and other tat from the shittiest market stalls in the land from my brother and his family who are richer than a "Death by Chocolate" cake. Thanks you cheap arseholes.

YABU
Because teachers get inundated with gifts, many/mostly unwanted and useless, whether homemade or not. Each child that has given is generally learning about showing appreciation and enjoys having things to gift.

Same with everyone. We all get our share of gifts that we don't have a use or want for, again homemade or not.

I say this as someone who has received some amazing hand knits, and high quality hand-made items, which would fetch a lot of money if sold.

However, there are crafters who choose to push their creations on others regardless of gift intuition, but then there are many differing tastes, and this thread comes up so repeatedly its boring and often offensive to the act of gifting.

So, yes, yabu. What happened to its the thought that counts. Grabby.

However.... home made gifts made by kiddies should be cherished, never mocked no matter if you think them hideous.

My mum was a Lollypop Lady when I was a little girl and was so loved by all the kids they sometimes would make her things as a present throughout the year. At Xmas her bike basket would be filled with treats and pictures and clay models of her or animals (some which which were very... abstract)

When she died and we had to clear the house she had a huge chest filled with all those hand made gifts and cards. She couldn't bear the thought of throwing them out as each one had been made with love by a little one. (I'm not crying... you are!)

So, yes, yabu. What happened to its the thought that counts. Grabby.

How can it be grabby when I’ve said I’d rather have nothing?

@katseyes7, your creations are just stunning!

BitOfFun Thank you, that's very kind.

Fabric and yarn are NOT cheap, btw; one reason that it's difficult to make a successful business out of quilting or crochet/knitting etc is that most people would baulk at being quoted a price which even covered the materials only, never mind the labour and learning hours. We have become so accustomed to fast fashion and furnishings from huge retailers and sweatshops that we often don't realise how expensive handmade at home products are.

Oh FFS, the sort of handmade gifts that are made by skilled craftspeople do involve spending money on components. Yes, making sweets or jam in quantities is a bit cheaper than buying individual pots from the farmers' market - or Waitrose - but not that much and those who sew or knit or crochet have to buy the fucking wool.

Ooooh I just remembered a good one.

I know someone who buys very VERY cheap sparkling white wine. And soaks off the labels. Then she takes all of 2 minutes to stick some of those self adhesive glittery foam letters from hobbycraft in it (usually not evenly spaced or even straight) sometimes she glues some glitter to it as well in random patterns.

What amazes me most is that not only does she gift these but she also tries to SELL them for £15 each!

Remarkable tat.

But again I say a well executed item is a beautiful gift.