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To think this isn't normal behaviour?

89 replies

Worriedmum1511 · 17/11/2019 15:27

Dd is 5. Ds is 3.

In the car just now dd leant accross and unclipped her brother and herself. There was somewhere 100-ish yards down the road I could safely stop. All of a sudden dd shouts "jump" and ds goes flying accross the car on to her lap, misses and ends up in the footwell. I get distrscted and then need to slam my brakes on and slightly rear end the car in front.

I'm absolutely exasperated with Dd. Surely she should get it? She s forever throwing shoes at me when I'm driving and lunging for me and ds.

This can't be normal behaviour?

OP posts:
IWorkAtTheCheescakeFactory · 18/11/2019 08:48

What about an actual padlock with a key, which you can thread through the harness to stop her undoing it?


Think it through....

ironicname · 18/11/2019 08:58

You need to explain what happens to kids who don't wear seatbelts. Be clear - they fly through the windscreen and land on the road dead.

She absolutely has to respect car safety. If she is laughing in your face you need to get tough, especially when she is influencing your son too.

Worriedmum1511 · 18/11/2019 09:39

Would love to be able to padlock her in (and into her bed!) 😂

I've gone as far as showing her videos on YouTube of car crash and she says mummy needs to concentrate so I don't crash but she doesn't seem to get the link for her actions is what is is dangerously distracting

OP posts:
ClownsandCowboys · 18/11/2019 10:14

@ironicname that wouldn't work with a neurodiverse child. They can't always make the connecrion between what you've told them previously and their actions.

Be careful with tablets, I've been hit by a flying kindle during one of my dd's meltdowns.

@Worriedmum1511 don't feel guilty or as if this is in any way your fault. I would start with some social stories while you save the money.

havingtochangeusernameagain · 18/11/2019 10:27

What about an actual padlock with a key, which you can thread through the harness to stop her undoing it

I think any solution has to be very quick and easy for the parent to unfasten if they need to get a child out of the car quickly. This wouldn't be.

OP you say you can't keep your kids safe when walking, either. What's the issue there? Is your dd too big to go on short reins?

GrumpyHoonMain · 18/11/2019 10:34

Put the 3 yo at the front. Have child locks on. Buy a beltguard (a lock for the seatbelt effectively) from amazon for the 5 yo.

GrumpyHoonMain · 18/11/2019 10:34

You don’t need a padlock. You need a belt guard

Worriedmum1511 · 18/11/2019 12:40

She can bypass the beltguards already have them.

@havingtochangeusernameagain walking is an issue because of the tendency to run off and also go off with strangers.

I spoke to her school this morning. They are contacting early help/whoever they can to try and get her assessment ASAP

OP posts:
ClownsandCowboys · 18/11/2019 16:17

Go to your GP too. It is sometimes the paediatrician who assesses, in my area it is Camhs. If you live near the Lorna Wing Centre (Essex and somewhere else south) you can get the GP to refer as an NHS patient. They are experts in ASD in girls and women.

It usually wouldn't be the school who organised assessment, although they are asked for input. ASD is a medical issue rather than a learning one.

Worriedmum1511 · 18/11/2019 16:34

She is already under the peadiatrics. She was added at 3yr2m and was deemed very close to the line and wanted further assessment after 12-18m. Then she ended up too close to school age so the preschool clinic wouldn't reassess so we have had to wait for her to be eligible for school age clinic. Now her pead is off long term sick so there's a massive back log.

School and gp have both written

OP posts:
Worriedmum1511 · 18/11/2019 16:36

Assessed not added

OP posts:
Worriedmum1511 · 18/11/2019 17:21

Just to add to my woes whilst cooking dinner she turned the bathroom taps on full and has completely flooded our downstairs neighbour

OP posts:
BerwickLad · 18/11/2019 18:07

What a ballache.

Have a look here for organisations that can help with equipment - you don't necessarily need a diagnosis/referral:

BerwickLad · 18/11/2019 18:08
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