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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be outraged by Nativity casting as 'Innkeeper's wife'!!!

1000 replies

PIPERHELLO · 15/11/2019 09:26

Daughter (6) has been cast as 'someone's wife' in the Nativity play at school. 'Innkeeper's wife' to be precise.

Err...hello!?

This is fucking not OK! In 2019, to be identified as 'someone's wife'.

Normally I am pretty relaxed about all things school, and I certainly feel sorry for he teachers' workloads, but come on people!? This is 2019 - no woman should be identified by her relationship to a man!? SURELY!

Itching to call them out on this. Itching!

OP posts:
TriangularRatbag · 16/11/2019 11:58

If you genuinely believe that this is a conduit into reinforcing childrens beliefs like that then you very much misunderstand the minutiae of social conditioning and the interaction of home , social and school on the complexity of social beliefs...

You may wish to read up on more complex use of mirroring discrepancy linguistics.

This thread is so heading for the Daily Mail Grin

BlouseAndSkirt · 16/11/2019 11:58

SandraAtTheInn; ‘Row’ not ‘tie’ bloody papyrus got blotted.

paperbeatsrock · 16/11/2019 12:01

Bravo, StillCoughingandLaughing! I was mulling over something quite a bit darker, working title 'A Million Tiny Hills To Die On’, but I much prefer your treatment.

BertrandRussell · 16/11/2019 12:02

“ If you genuinely believe that this is a conduit into reinforcing childrens beliefs like that then you very much misunderstand the minutiae of social conditioning and the interaction of home , social and school on the complexity of social beliefs.”

So are you saying there’s no point in trying to model equality in little things?

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 16/11/2019 12:03

Nottonight quite. I'm surprised not to have read the gem "feminism gone too far" yet Grin

Vagndidit · 16/11/2019 12:05

Bravo, StillCoughing, bravo!! 😁😂

wowfudge · 16/11/2019 12:05

I haven't rtft but did anyone notice the OP stated it was "casual feminism"? I think she meant sexism.

BertrandRussell · 16/11/2019 12:07

Looking forward to Sandra

  • The Musical, by the way. Andrew Lloyd-Webber is sure to leap aboard. Starting with a Saturday night talent show “Looking for Sandra”
amd4578 · 16/11/2019 12:10

What if for example she was a kept lady and was happy with being just that? What would you describe her as then?

Ill make sure at my husbands Christmas party that when he introduces me as his wife ill give him a good slap just for you OP....

oh shit i have just described him to you as my husband... i meant to say the breadwinner for my family and the father to my children please dear lord forgive me!!!

TriangularRatbag · 16/11/2019 12:10

Aha!

www.amazon.co.uk/Innkeepers-Wife-J-Cronin-ebook/dp/B00EKHIAJ2?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

A. J. Cronin
The Innkeeper's Wife

Here now is the alternative story of Christmas, narrated with great skill.

The title of the story would be The Innkeper’s Wife, for she, as I imagine her, is the central human character—a good and tender-hearted woman, childless herself, and bullied by an assertive and miserly husband.

Outrageously, AJ Cronin has not given the poor woman a name Angry

BertrandRussell · 16/11/2019 12:12

“ Ill make sure at my husbands Christmas party that when he introduces me as his wife ill give him a good slap just for you OP....”
Well, if he introduces you as his wife without adding your name, then I hope you do!

amd4578 · 16/11/2019 12:14

So if the part was described as Sandra the Innkeepers wife would we be happy?

BertrandRussell · 16/11/2019 12:18

Yep. Said so about a million pages ago. Would prefer Gary and Sandra-innkeepers, but a name for the wife would do at a push.

BlouseAndSkirt · 16/11/2019 12:23

“So if the part was described as Sandra the Innkeepers wife would we be happy?”

No I’d be holding out for Sandra and Barry, The Innkeepers.

Katinski · 16/11/2019 12:56

@StillCoughing bloody superb.Thank you!GrinGrinGrin

theoriginalmadambee · 16/11/2019 13:31

@StillCoughingandLaughing ⭐️🤣

BertsFriend · 16/11/2019 14:36

I agree with you op, and I'm surprised at so many posters missing the point. They're both inn keepers.

Barbie222 · 16/11/2019 15:11

I think you are directing your ire at the wrong person - it's been a few years since I had the time to write my own Nativity, or edit any aspect of the script. In 99% of schools the script will be a commercial one which they have paid for and can't alter as they will have paid a license fee. I'm not saying you are wrong but this is one time when the rot needs to be cut out at source. There are a few main players you can google and tweet.

KateK00 · 16/11/2019 16:42

I haven’t RTFT but I really hope this is a joke. I lost my DD last month, I’d have been over the moon if she’d got to play a blade of grass in a nativity play. I just feel that there are far more important things to worry about in the world.

BackforGood · 16/11/2019 16:45

I think the OP should take a look at the thread where the OP helped out for ONE DAY in a Reception class and now needs a lie down.

Knittingnanny · 16/11/2019 17:13

Back for good haha yes! I had a friend who thought she might change from secondary to infant to cut down on mountains of marking. She spent the day with me in a reception class and at the end of the day said “ but I haven’t taught anyone anything, all I did was play, sort out squabbles and do toilet duty” She didn’t pursue the idea of swapping.
I second the poster who said about the commercial script. Most schools use those now as they come with a cd ( I was a pianist, but not all infant schools have one) and the performing licence which the school has to buy to put on performances wouldn’t allow it to be rewritten.

AdalindMeisner · 16/11/2019 17:14

@KateK00 I am so sorry for your loss of your daughter Flowers

Angiemum24 · 16/11/2019 17:24

Grow up you silly woman!

  1. She’s a child and doesn’t need to be worried about things like that so don’t project it on to her.
And 2. It’s traditional and there are only so many parts! I was a camel when I was younger and I didn’t worry about gender rights.

Get over yourself!

mummmy2017 · 16/11/2019 17:27

I bet this little girl is chuffed to bits to have a part playing an inn keepers wife.
She is telling anyone who will listen, as she doesn't give a stuff about being named Inn keepers wife.
However due to mummy being so cross about the wording, DD heard mummy talking to daddy about it, DD just doesn't mention it when mummy is around.
DD knows mummy has some things she gets cross about, and DD will stop telling mummy things as mummy does this a lot.
DD sits and listens to mummy, but has no blooming idea what mummy's rants are about. Now will BF be a good donkey.

Cornishgorl44 · 16/11/2019 17:27

From a EYFS teacher about to cast a nativity play - get a bloody grip woman these kids are four years old at the oldest seven !! It’s meant to be fun.
You could always offer to go in and help your daughters teacher ! -thought not

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