to be outraged by Nativity casting as 'Innkeeper's wife'!!!

[PIPERHELLO]

Daughter (6) has been cast as 'someone's wife' in the Nativity play at school. 'Innkeeper's wife' to be precise.

Err...hello!?

This is fucking not OK! In 2019, to be identified as 'someone's wife'.

Normally I am pretty relaxed about all things school, and I certainly feel sorry for he teachers' workloads, but come on people!? This is 2019 - no woman should be identified by her relationship to a man!? SURELY!

Itching to call them out on this. Itching!

Mme Thenardier I believe. Can't the OP's darling daughter big the role up a bit. Burst into song?
"Lord knows 'ow I've lasted,
Living with this bastard
In the House"

Also King Harrod

Ace!

Op you are totally not being unreasonable and this outdated shit needs removing from schools so our impressionable young girls don’t think that being someone’s wife is an actual career choice.

Our school makes the girls kings or adds queens, the innkeeper is a girl, the angel Gabriel is sometimes a girl. It’s about adapting the story to modern times, one which is equal between the genders. I would complain and ask them to justify this kind of role in 2019. They have a statutory duty to teach a different message.

This is a hilarious thread!

OP, does the Innkeeper's Wife have any lines in the play? I'd be more outraged by the lack of lines (if the innkeeper gets them all instead) than by the title of the role.

Don't be so ridiculous. She has a part in the play be happy for her and support her. Stop being so weird. I'm sick of people being so easily offended now. I bet you don't let her have unicorns and dress her in blue too.

“Whilst I kind of get the OP's point, this is a school play at a busy time of year for teachers”

I agree. But I would expect a teacher to be switched on to this kind of thing, to be honest. I would expect it to be parents complaining about “PC gone mad” than about lazy old fashioned sexism.

You are ridiculous. in these days, being a wife was a jobdescription.
if you would be serious, you would talk to your daughter about how things have changed, that women now can be inkeepers if they want to. 2000 years ago, that was not an option

I bet this is on mumsnet madness (on twitter) already.

Ooh, my first biscuit!!

Triangular I am shocked, I tell you, SHOCKED. How dare you not be woke 40 years ago!!

so our impressionable young girls don’t think that being someone’s wife is an actual career choice.

like Kate Middleton you mean?

What's wrong with being someone wife and being a SAH one exactly?

If playing a lobster in a school play determines your child's career path anyway, I would be questioning your parenting more than the random casting by an overworked teacher.

by popping a dishcloth on his head. As a person of Arab descent myself, I took slight umbrage at this and proceed to make him the most splendid shepherd costume

I like t think I would have done this - my humble Shepherd would have looked more resplendent that all three kings put together.

Totally agree with you OP. Your DD is an innkeeper. It's that simple. Of course this stuff matters. How else do patriarchal norms get continued or broken?

Hilarious how in your first set of replies you are maligned for being an opinionated millennial (snowflake) and then - horror of horrors - a middle aged woman (Sandra). Here's hoping OP was born in 1981 so her opinion might just be valid!

(it's OK I know this is AIBU and was therefore fair game)

Maybe the innkeeper is also female, and this role is her same-sex wife?

Perhaps the "Innkeeper" has also been cast as a girl, so a same-sex innkeeping team? That would be fun.

This is why loads of schools don't do traditional nativities any more, and leave it to church groups etc. Because it's a minefield trying to make a Bible story appropriate for modern times without upsetting someone. Bring on the lobsters, I say!

There aren't enough biscuit emojis in existence for this thread ...

I have had my eyes opened to everyday sexism over the last couple of years, in great part due to some of the information on MN. I do now speak up when I see / hear it and having a daughter I am more aware than ever of highlighting nonsense and using it as a discussion point.

However this just isn't one of those instances (IMHO of course). If you really feel it's so outrageous and you are itching to call school out on it, then do. If really believe in what you think, act on it. You are still That Parent because of the views you hold, whether you vocalise them or not.

Don't waste any more time on here, DO SOMETHING. You don't need validation.

X-post waterSpider - great minds!

Soft anti feminists opposed to concrete feminists . Not anti just not that militant.

@stillathing but she wouldn't have been an innkeeper 2000 years ago would she.

She'd have been a cleaner and cook and looked after the children

That should have said humorous collage, FFS. A humourless collage is a bit WTF.

I was the innkeeper’s wife. It has done me no harm. I’ve got two degrees, a career and a family. I didn’t let it hold me back in life....

Well said, Abetes! What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

I would suggest that all schools just stick to the Biblical script, except that what would happen to all of the lobsters etc?

We can't even offer to feed them to the VM after her camel-house birthing ordeal - they're not Kosher.

OP, this is a historical drama. You don't rewrite history (herstory) by modern norms.

If no one says anything, ever, about anything, nothing changes. We’d still be cocoa powdering the kings and giving all the angel parts to girls. Thank god there are people like the OP who do challenge, or we’d still be considered the property of our fathers/husbands and not be allowed to vote.

I challenge these things always. I find teachers are grateful for the nod as long as you say it politely and offer to help resolve any difficulties change causes.

I'm sure there's too many children for roles - there's probably only a few 'main roles' and not every child can be Mary so there has to be a lot of extra roles made up so that every child is included. It's not about belittling a child to 'just a wife', it's about including every child.

Would you feel more comfortable if she was cast as the innkeepers friend?

Why on earth does the Innkeeper have to be a male part at all? It’s not like Mary and Joseph, where clearly it matters.

Surely people aren’t going for factual accuracy? I mean, you do realise there was probably no such person anyway?

And Angel Gabriel is frequently a girl these days, although in the Bible he’s clearly a bloke.

Schools can and should do better than lazily going for what has always been. And actually most schools are better than that these days IME.

Some parts in traditional plays do have to realistically be played by boys. But innkeeper is not one of them! He’s not a key historical figure !

Oh lordy. Ridiculous.
My 6 year old daughter has been cast as the inn keepers wife too and she couldn't be more excited because she has a speaking part.
What is the world coming to if you have an issue with this?!?