To think not everybody would date an arms dealer?

[WineInTheSun]

At a dinner party, without giving too much away conversation turned to the subject of a mutual friend/former colleague.
The host casually dropped in how the individual no longer works after ‘doing alright when she met that arms dealer’.
Most of the table agreed said person had indeed ‘done well’ to date such a high earning worth individual and the new lifestyle she had.
Not trying to get on my high horse but I felt slightly disgusted!
So Aibu?

Personally, even if my boyfriend made his giant fortune by saving kittens and inventing co-friendly grooming products for baby unicorns, I wouldn’t give up my job, and don’t understand why anyone would.

Says just as much about the people saying it as it does about her.

That they value bagging a rich husband as some kind of pinnacle for womankind, doesn't exactly reflect well on them.

That where his money came from is irrelevant to them, screams many things, again, nothing good.

Yep, the whole conversation was grim! Glad to know I’m not the only person to think it’s a bit wtf and unreasonable

I couldn’t because I’d know that every single thing that my boyfriend bought me was dripping with the blood from someone’s murder.

You’re disgusted by the fact that she is considered to be doing well because her boyfriend is wealthy, or because of where his money comes from?

You could do with better friends tbh.

Blood money is where it comes from.

Both! Grim how it was discussed as an achievement and grim where the money is coming from

I am horrified by how many of my friends think I am insane by refusing to date men that work for companies that make weapons. "I know the perfect man for you, he has a huge salary, got a brilliant job at BAE you'd be set for life." Erm, no thanks. I prefer to live in a home that wasn't bought with the blood money from selling weapons to be used by child soldiers...

"UGH, you're SO picky!"

1. Giving up your job because your boyfriend/husband is wealthy - meh. Not for me. There can be certain situation such as the husband travelling a lot so your choices of a job requiring commute are limited but still doable.
2. Arm dealer - no, I certainly wouldn't date one or marry one. Call me a snowflake but I have some values and opinions and there are certain limits I wouldn't cross - arms dealing, drugs dealing etc. Notwithstanding the fact that families of those people are in danger per association when it comes to conflicts with the competition.

It depends what kind of arms dealer he is, does he work for a huge multinational like BAE or Lockheed or even boeing or is he a dodgy intermediate?

The UK is the 3rd biggest exporter of arms in the world there is going to be plenty of people in UK who work for arms company's.

Pretty stupid to give up your financial independence and security for an unmarried partner.

Ha! I told my husband I'd divorce him if he worked for BAE. Fortunately he didn't want to either.

As mentioned already, there's a big difference between "Arms dealer" and "works in the Defence industry".

There are many other industries where one can find unsavoury manufacturing, sales, end-users, etc etc.

There's also the type of arms dealer who sells guns to Olympic sportsmen .......

Would you refuse to date someone who sold running shoes which allow someone to get away from the scene of a crime quickly?

I believe actual arms dealer, The former colleague/mutual friend used to work elsewhere in the world (really don’t want to be too obvious) albeit not in the arms industry at all. But an area with a very high number/need (if there’s such things for arms sales. Guy she’s met is seriously wealthy, and from what was said is an arms dealer rather than working in the arms industry. I had never even considered if I would date somebody involved in this as it’s not really my type of thing! I wouldn’t though, just seems to carry guilt with it

No, because people aren't generally killed by running shoes.

No, because I Imagine hearing people talk about which marathons/trainer requiring events were the most profitable is not the same as hearing which conflicts were the most profitable....

Would you not date someone who was in the car industry in case those cars went on to be used in crimes, hit and runs etc? How silly.

Weapons are used to end lives, cause catostrophic life changing injuries, or at the very least cause terror and fear. That is there primary use and function.

Running shoes are not predominantly used for inflicting death, pain and fear.

Apropos of fuck all, "Lord of War" was a powerful film ...

Would you not date someone who was in the car industry in case those cars went on to be used in crimes, hit and runs etc? How silly.

It's not "in case" with the arms industry is it? It's "for sure". And it's thousands of casualties.

But the police still need then for example.

Well, we need arms. Can’t see the problem myself.

@raspberryk Cars or weapons?