Should I go back to work now?

[Jadefeather7]

I’m on mat leave (6 months in) just found out I’m pregnant again and due in 8 months. Should I take the full year go back for a month and then start my next mat leave or shall I go back now?

My mat leave package is decent and I don’t need to worry about the money (it also mean however that going part time seems silly because I’d get the money I’m getting now for just staying at home).

My reasons for going back are 1) not wanting a huge career gap because I will find it difficult to get back into the swing of things after two years off. I doubt I will stay at the same company in the long run as a lot is changing so will likely need to find a new job once I’m ready to go back after baby 2 and a big career break won’t help and 2) feeling a bit depressed being at home.

On the other hand my job is quite stressful and has long hours. Having to come home to a baby and being pregnant is not ideal!

Please tell me what you think, I really don’t know what to do!

Do you not have to go back for a qualifying period for your maternity pay?

If money is no object stay off. Pregnant and with a tiny baby + long commute? You’ll really struggle to be productive at work and your home life will be really tough.

@Jollitwiglet It doesn’t seem like it. I’ve looked at my policy and it just talks about needing a certain amount of service to be entitled to maternity pay (I’ve worked with them for around 10 years). I can’t see anything that would preclude me from getting the pay if I didn’t go back.

One of the options I was considering is asking to work from home 3 days a week and go in for 2 but I really don’t know. There’s a part of me that really wants to get back into work and then there’s a part of me that thinks it’s silly to add pressure and stress to my life!

It seems odd that your company wouldn't require you to be back for the qualifying period. I know you've said you've checked the policy but I'd be inclined to have a quiet and confidential word with HR to check, just in case.

Congrats on baby number 2!

"feeling a bit depressed being at home"
For this reason I think you should consider going back sooner rather than later.
I didn't particularly enjoy maternity leave (in hindsight I think I had mild PND) and felt happier when I went back to work.
However, I worked part-time and had a short commute.
In your position I would consider making a flexible working request for part-time (4 days a week maybe?) with some WFH.

If you do go back, I suggest you wait until your pregnancy gets to 13 weeks or so, as the first trimester can be so exhausting and it usually improves by the second trimester. Also if you're on SMP (as opposed to enhanced maternity pay) that stops after 39 weeks of maternity leave. So that should roughly coincide with you starting your second semester.

That's just my 2 cents though - it's a very personal decision and there are no wrong answers, just what's best for you!

What would you do about childcare? You may end up worse off financially if you could get the same money not working, as working you’d have to pay childcare. And also would it unsettle your baby taking them out of childcare when on maternity again?

With Tax Free Childcare you can get 20% off childcare costs. But if your maternity pay is as/almost as good as your salary, it probably wouldn't make financial sense to go back to work until it stops or decreases.

Finances aren't the only factor of course.

I would go back- had somewhat similar in that I found out I was pregnant a month after going back- similar small gap between kids. Was back full time- for about 8 months. Kept my hand in & my options open and I enjoyed the brain food side of it.
Plus when you know you are going in a few months it means you can see light at the end of the tunnel so to speak- even if it’s tiring you know it’s not for that long.

I will check about the qualifying period aspect. I know HR are supposed to be confidential but i feel a bit skeptical about that!

The post natal depression is a big reason for wanting to go back as the thought of two years of this makes me anxious! Having said that if work was stressful and I had to manage baby, home, difficult pregnancy it wouldn’t be great either.
If I reduced my hours it will effect my maternity pay next time around. I could look at 4 days but it will mean slightly less maternity pay next time around. I couldn’t commute 5 days a week. If that’s what they expect then I would have to take the full year off. In terms of childcare I would get a nanny. As someone said above though having childcare for a few months and then stopping it because I’m on Mat leave isn’t ideal.

I know this is silly but I also feel embarrassed about facing my colleagues having got pregnant again! I was the first in my office to have a baby. All the women that I work with are very career driven and don’t have kids. I know it’s very silly to feel this way though.

Go back 4 days & wfh 1 day. . You can do it for a few months- even if stressful. A 2 yr break sounds as if it could really dent your confidence.
Childminder might be a better solution- and then keep dc1 in there but less hours (finances permitting) when back on mat leave. So it’s a change but not a complete upheaval for them. Yes you’d still be paying for some childcare- but will give you a hit of time with just new baby & breathing space you will cherish.

And for all you know the other women at work are green with envy about your pregnancy! Not a question of feeling silly- different people just have different lives..

@kilburnfrenchie childminder is an interesting idea I hadn’t considered because my hours are usually quite long so nanny seemed like the best option but I suppose I could try to negotiate on the hours if I am doing 5 days

Does your partner also work long hours with a long commute?
You should could share childcare drop offs and pick ups.
Financially it most probably wouldn't be worth returning to work and using a nanny for just one child. Not unless you have an arrangement to make it cheaper eg nanny share or nanny with own child.

Personally I’d leave it a couple of months longer and go back for 6 months with baby at Childminder. I went back when my dad was 11 months and had another baby just under 9 months later. I was glad I’d been back. Left my dd at the childminder one day pw when I had my second but actually 2 or 3 days would have been much better. 2 years out would have knocked my confidence.

My husband works long hours but mostly from home. Having said that he travels to other cities for 2/3 nights at least twice a month and his schedule is very unpredictable so although he’s around it’s hard to rely on him.

It’s interesting to know that so many of you have said that it’s worth going back for a bit. I really need to consider it carefully.

If I were you I'd do some research and calculations.
Look into the cost of one or two local nannies and childminders (remember with a childminder you can get 20% off via Tax Free Childcare).
Work out what your salary (and future maternity pay) would be if you go back 4 days a week instead of full time.
Do all the sums for different scenarios, then you'll have the finances in black and white, and can consider what will be best for you in terms of mental health and maintaining your career v financial implications.

I strongly advise you to check both your SMP and occupational maternity pay entitlement. A key criteria for SMP is your actual earnings during your qualifying period. www.gov.uk/maternity-paternity-calculator
Often if you don't qualify for SMP you don't qualify for occupational maternity pay.

To be honest I think the financial implications aren’t really my primary concern. I’m fortunate to have good savings, a decent maternity package and a good salary.

I think my priority is really my mental health (short and long term). At the moment I can’t figure out whether going back to work will help or make it worse for me. In the long run I guess going back will be better as my confidence won’t be knocked but in the short term it could be difficult particularly if work is really stressful.

@Margaritatime

During my qualifying week I will be on about 2k per month if I carry on with my maternity leave. I think that will mean my initial payment on my 2nd maternity leave will be (90% of 2k). Thereafter my policy says I get paid 50% of my actual salary for the rest of the year (so it seems to not be linked to the qualifying period pay).

Could you explain what you mean by not qualifying for SMP?

Bloody hell your enhanced maternity pay is excellent! 50% for the whole year!!

I suspected as much (mental health v financial implications). In that case I really do advise you to go back. Make a flexible working request and see if you can do part time with some WFH. IMO that would be a "safer" option than going back full time which I do think would be exhausting while pregnant with a toddler.

(FWIW I actually enjoyed work stress after the boredom of maternity leave That said my job is probably less stressful than yours and nowhere near as well paid.)

Maternity leave (SML) and maternity pay (SMP) are not the same thing at all OP so you need to be careful. You are entitled to up to 12 months off regardless of any qualifying criteria. SMP however does have qualifying criteria and that is usually also the starting point for any Company Maternity Pay (CMP) which is the enhanced element of pay. Most companies who offer CMP essentially ‘top up’ the SMP, rather than simply pay ‘full pay’ so will only offer it if you do qualify. If you don’t qualify you could qualify for Maternity Allowance which is claimed as a benefit but is not through your employer and so wouldn’t usually be ‘topped up’ by them.

@AnotherEmma I know it’s really good. The only down side is that the work can be really stressful, long hours etc. If I get a nice project it could be manageable but if I end up on a horrible one then I will be really stressed out.