To find DP patronising about Mn

[Hibbsy]

Long time lurker here, current sat watching Only Connect with DP as kids in bed, both on respective iPads. Hear him giggling and ask “what is funny?”, he says “nothing”. Giggles again and ask again, he says he’s on a forum he’s a member of (football 355 or something, I’ve never really asked) and there’s a thread on MN where they basically take the piss out of posts on here and he’s laughing at a post where someone here is upset about being though of as a lesbian from asking a friend to spend the night in comfies watching tv.
I thought this was a harmless forum where they talked about football and had no issues but apparently it’s more than that and the MN threat has over 10000 posts mainly taking the piss out of people on here, along with “blokes” threads about women. On one they even ask them to rate women as “minx or minger”
I’m was happy he has his own place online but feel now that it’s simply pandering to sexist misogynist behaviour. AIBU to think we can’t even have this place to ourselves without men using it as a source of entertainment to reinforce the idea of the “stupid little woman indoors”?

Must admit though I'm surprised it was a football forum, I'd be expecting it to be a cycling forum given MN views on cycling. After all here divorce is the only solution to cycling!

Predictably we see Mumsnet users here falling over themselves to criticise something they've never seen or experienced.

I'm a member on F365, along with numerous women, and I can assure you that many of the things said in this thread about said forum are ignorant, bigoted and supremely hypocritical. There isn't a woman hating vibe, 'snakes with tits' isn't used as shorthand for women, it's used in context in exactly the same way we refer to men as bastards on here, usually based on very little information, one-sided tales or our own issues, insecurities, neuroses, bitterness and sexism.

People playing the victim in here are guilty of the kind of generalisations they claim to be disgusted by. Unless you have an account on F365 you don't know what you're talking about. Fact is users on there laugh at some of the more ridiculous threads on MN, because they're fucking hilarious. Seeing MN threads on there, analysed in the cold light of day, emphasises their absurdity and it's entertaining. We need to accept that our problems, at least the things we consider to be problems, are often entertaining to others.

Seeing MN threads on there, analysed in the cold light of day, emphasises their absurdity and it's entertaining.

Loving the idea that a football forum is “the cold light of day” as opposed to, er, a parenting forum.

You’ll notice that there aren’t 1000+ post threads on MN dedicated to mocking that forum. (And yet strangely we’re the ‘ignorant, bigoted’ ones, who could not POSSIBLY UNDERSTAND unless we had an account there.) Why do you think that might be?

We need to accept that our problems, at least the things we consider to be problems, are often entertaining to others.

hmmm... yes, how funny are little women's problems. Patronizing much?

Thank you for clarifying @MaryMcCarthy

"playing the victim"

A very telling choice of phrase.

There was a thread on here the other day full of women saying they don't trust any men and that all men are horrible bastards. Completely serious thread.

I read the thread. I believe the woman posting was a victim of DV, hence why she and her DD had moved away. But if they want to "banta" and rate a woman who has been abused as if she were a piece of meat, then craic on. Says more about your DH and the others than it does about her. I wouldn't be able to look the same way at DH if he did this...quite frankly its revolting.

As to your question about having a space online, I agree with PP that some posts are funny and ridiculous and talking about them on other forums would mainly be seen as harmless, depending of course on the content involved. In this case, no: the men are just showing themselves as unevolved apes who only see a woman as a sexual object

"SWT = snakes with tits apparently"

Get your terminology right, OP's partner:
we're vipers.
A nest of.

I have just looked at Mumsnet Madness on Twitter and burst out laughing at the second post. I am a bad woman, disloyal to my kind!

But I wouldn't want my partner joining in.

Your thread title misses the point. Should read “my husband is a misogynistic prick”

The football forum won’t be the only place people take the piss out of MN. But if your husband thinks using that kind of language about women is really funny, you should be focussing on that.

Considering how much this forum bad mouth men, I don’t see why it upsets you. Are men not allowed to vent like the women on here? Double standards

Obviously if it’s an issue for you then it’s a problem. However, he’s not doing anything wrong. Some of the threads on here are crazy and some I do laugh at. Mumsnet isn’t just serious stuff and parenting it’s so much more when you actually look around. I think people are taking the mocking of some threads way too seriously, they aren’t laughing at mumsnet as a whole, it’s just the few threads that are batshit. Reddit even has a sub or two for the stupidity or hilarious things found on their own site. It’s not that deep basically.

hmmm... yes, how funny are little women's problems. Patronizing much?

You’re the one insinuating that women’s problems are inherently funny and little, not me. Do you really think a football forum takes earnest, serious threads about genuine problems from MN in order to laugh at them? I can list the threads that make it from here to F365 if you want, to put your mind at ease. It’s maybe one or two per week. That recent one about the charity worker and her work ethic made it for instance, before it was deleted. Reading through the responses to that on F365 I can’t see a single one that veers into sexism – no mention of SWTs and every comment could equally be applied to a man with the same dismal work ethic and disrespect for colleagues. The motivation is not sexism although there are sometimes comments about how differently the same topics and questions are covered on a male dominated vs female dominated forum. There are marked differences, which are fascinating to me.

What I suggested was that some of the problems women deign to stress about are funny to outsiders, either because they’re objectively not worthy of stress or more commonly because the conceit, lack of self awareness and warped priorities of those involved make these problems funny, absurd, or otherwise worthy of comment or disdain. “How the other half live” type insights. I guess the moral is if you don’t want strangers deconstructing your words then don’t put them on such a prominent open forum.

There are some women on this forum who treat men like objects and stereotype them. Just as there will always be idiots in this world. The issue here is that the OPs DP is treating women like objects and stereotyping them, and has therefore shown himself to be a Misogynistic Idiot.

Some women also behaving badly doesn’t change that.

Tell you what, MaryMcCarthy - if it's so harmless and lighthearted and not at all misogynistic, show us and prove it. Screenshot post 13 of that thread and post it here.

PAGE 13, that is. Show us a whole page, not a single post!

Some mumsnet users are well rounded, balanced individuals and they too laugh at the stuff that gets posted here. But that’s ok because of the shape of their genitals.

If you have the wrong shape of genitals you are not allowed to laugh at or mock anything on Mumsnet.

I’m always glad when I see mumsnet posters with normal, developed perspective. The ones who like to dish it out but can’t take it, not so much. It’s a mark of character.

Congratulations to all the Not Like The Other Girls posters here who think they can avoid being referred to as a ‘snake with tits’ by loudly proclaiming that this wouldn’t bother them at all.

Oh dear. Is this the new variant on ‘Cool Wives’? A catch-all phrase to mock any woman who doesn’t want to control every aspect of her partner’s life by dismissing her as a ‘man-pleaser’?

It’s cheap, it’s lazy and it’s what people do when they’ve lost the argument.

Well, that's certainly told me. I suppose I'll just have to slither my reptilian tits over somewhere else to be re-educated on how 'minx or minger' threads are in fact a deep and heartfelt compliment.

Well, that's certainly told me. I suppose I'll just have to slither my reptilian tits over somewhere else to be re-educated on how 'minx or minger' threads are in fact a deep and heartfelt compliment

Sad isn't it? although not being mammals I don't think snakes have tits

I’m sorry but slither my reptilian tits has killed me.

@53rdWay

You’re either from that forum on the wind up so something else weird is going on.

No coincidence you selected page 13, so you’re obviously a member of the f365 forum. Your references to minx or minger threads is so vastly outdated given they have resulted in people being banned from the site ever since Sky acquired the company 12 years ago.

What’s your motive? I’m puzzled

If women are snakes with tits then what are men?
Worms with testicles?

No coincidence you selected page 13, so you’re obviously a member of the f365 forum.

I selected a random number, because obviously if I said 'select a page of your choosing!' you could pick whichever page made the forum look best. I'm not a member of the forum (do I sound like it here, honestly?) and have close to zero interest in football.

What's on page 13 that's so controversial? Why does me picking 13 rather than another number mean 'something weird is going on'?