AIBU not to give my DD (16m) anything else for dinner

[MeadowHay]

She's a fairly fussy eater and often only eats certain components of a meal. This evening she went to her high chair, signalling hunger, and cried the whole time I was heating her dinner (leftovers). I gave it to her and she picked off a few chunks of a veg she likes (it's a soup) and refused to eat any more and threw a huge tantrum. She has eaten this soup fine before a few weeks ago but she is getting fussier and fussier as time goes on. I absolutely do not want to reinforce this by making her an alternative dinner and then having to continue doing this when she learns she can get away with it. But I feel awful at the thought of her going to bed hungry with her being so small.

More of a WWYD really.

She's very little, I would offer a yogurt or some fruit or weetabix and warm milk to fill her up. I'm pretty tough on only 1 dinner, but not when they are so tiny, 😍

She's little more than a baby, I'd offer something else.

Shes 16 months. Feed her and don't think about her 'getting her own way'. She's a baby still.

I'd offer something else like toast or weetabix or porridge. She may just not want soup. She cant really voice to you what she wants so you cant always expect her to devour whats in front of her

If they're going to go through a fussy phase you can't stop them. Trust me, I tried and tried. They grow out of it again eventually.

I’d probably try her on something quick and easy, but not particularly interesting (oatcake, plain toast). Don’t go making her a whole other meal but I don’t think there’s any harm in offering an alternative.

You might also find there’s something else going on - I remember despairing about my DS not eating, only to discover he was just cutting a tooth, or was getting ill.

YABVU. She’s a baby and far too young to understand anything other than the fact that she is hungry and wants something else to eat. You don’t have to make another meal but bread, fruit, yoghurt etc are reasonable.

don't make food a battle-ground.
suppose you didn't fancy soup and that's all you were allowed.
you'd probably protest too.
hang loose.
good luck.

At 16m, she is not manipulating you- and she can’t communicate very well. Offer her something else to eat.

She’s a baby!

You’re only making it harder for yourself as she will be waking up with hunger

She's a baby. Give her some toast or something ffs. Yabu.

Honestly people really need to chilli out with the way they approach dc and food.

She’s a baby, dc have phases of being fussy 🤷🏻‍♀️ It’s really not something to make a drama out of.

Just give her something simple peanut butter on toast, beans on toast

She’s a baby! Just give her something else that’s quick and easy, you wouldn’t like to eat soup if you didn’t fancy it

She’s 16 months - offer her something else of course. It would be horrible to put her to bed hungry - where she probably won’t Even sleep too well because of hunger.

Shes only little. Offer soemthing else. Toast etc the only thing you will achieve is baby goes bed with a hungry tummy and is up crying half the night if you dont feed her again

OP she’s very little and her hunger changes daily. I would agree with all of the above and don’t make it an issue. Definitely offer her something else , she’ll just make the connection that food is nice and pleasant. As long as you’re continuing to offer her a variety of foods daily she’ll be fine.
Trust me if they’re gonna be fussy they’re gonna be fussy. You can’t stop it.

My first was a very fussy eater. I gave up on putting my effort into 'proper' meals and went for a mini picnic style tea most nights. She liked variety and hated trad meals. 2nd child loved proper meals. You have to roll with the punches with toddlers.

As it's soup I would offer bread with it and if she only wanted to eat the bread that's ok and she can have more bread, but not demand other foods as tonight's meal is bread and soup. If that makes sense. For each meal there should be a variety or side dish if possible in this way and if they eat a less balanced meal, it doesn't really matter. Just think about it when you're choosing what to offer for the next few mealtimes. If she's only eaten bread for two meals in a row, don't have bread as a component of the next one, concentrate more on fruit /veg and protein sources.

Honestly people really need to chilli out with the way they approach dc and food
Easier said than done!
Mine was very fussy at that age, he survived on pasta, bread, fruit and milk. I would always offer a cooked dinner, if he refused it I offered wholemeal toast with butter. Not ideal but I didn't want to let him go hungry. I worried a lot!
He's a great little eater now, aged 5.

She’s too young to have that kind of attitude. Do not let her go to bed hungry

You can't leave your baby hungry

Thanks everyone. I feel bad but I just worry about everything. I have multiple adult relatives who never outgrew their ridiculous childhood fussiness and i would hate for her to turn out like that.

I gave her some bread and butter dipped in the soup which she ate. I might give her some cheese or something too as she'll probs eat that as well. And she had her milk too. I think PP is right about making sure a meal isnt just one component in future, tbh it's super rare for us that it is which means she usually eats the bits she wants and not the other bits which is a bit of a pain but not too big a deal.

Also it's not a fussy 'phase' as she's been fussy since day 1 of weaning, it's just recently been getting even worse. Which is another reason I worry as she's not a typical toddler in that she wasn't a baby who are everything and now suddenly refusing things.

If you're becoming anxious around her mealtimes, wondering if she is going to eat her food,
your DD will pick up
on that. She will learn from you that mealtimes are a problem which will make you feel that they really are a problem and the whole thing will escalate unnecessarily.

Reverse this by relaxing around mealtimes and food and she will do the same.

She's just a baby,., she will learn her behaviours from you cos you're her hero!

Good luck x

My dd was fussy and still is relatively so. But as a baby very much so. She survived on a narrow diet. I tried to make it as balanced as I could.

Don’t worry too much about food and don’t put rules down now that if she doesn’t eat not to feed her again until the next day. She’s growing, maybe tired, teeth hurt or pain somewhere.

I batch cooked for dd and froze it in individual tiny pots. It worked really well for her when she was little. It took the stress out of cooking. Maybe try doing this as you’ve always got something your dd likes to eat.

Maybe shes bored of what's on offer.

That's not meant to be rude either btw but my little one who is younger than yours never looks too happy to see a variation of leftovers either. So have to other bits and bobs in the house just encase!

I know it's hard but they just pick and choose at that stage!