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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder if you are you with your husband / partner...

98 replies

Rowennaravenclaw · 30/10/2019 23:09

A) Because you love them so much you couldn't live without them.

or

B) Because life with them is easier / better than being single.

Wish I could do a vote but I don't know how. So please comment away! Are you A or B?

OP posts:
BarbourellaTheCoatzilla · 31/10/2019 14:58

"I can't live without...." is a very common idiom, drop the pedantry.

A is true for me. B is also true but it's not the reason. He definitely makes my life better and easier just being in it, but I love the bones of him and would hate not being together.

PooWillyBumBum · 31/10/2019 14:59

Both.

Adore the man, but also find married life both financially and logistically cosy and easier!

daisyjgrey · 31/10/2019 14:59

I could live without him - I have - but I'd prefer not to.

VladmirsPoutine · 31/10/2019 15:00

I'd actually suggest that B should be broken up in two parts:

B) Because life with them is easier

C) better than being single

Because B could suggest children/financial ties, whereas C suggests a sort of ambivalence

Hippopotas · 31/10/2019 15:25

A

squaresandsquares · 31/10/2019 15:34

A

BeyondMyWits · 31/10/2019 15:34

Neither, we are together because we choose to be - because together we are a sum of much more than our separate selves. I know my life is brighter because he is in it.

I could live without him, but there is no power on earth that would make me want to try.

thechancellor · 31/10/2019 15:36

My husband is a 'rescue'. I am with him because his life would be shit without me.
My life would be much easier, cheaper and less complicated without him, but I love him enough to make some sacrifices.

honeyloops · 31/10/2019 15:38

Both - I like him and his company and my life is better for having him in it. I could live without him but I'd rather not.

MyGoodTimes · 31/10/2019 15:41

A

Circe32 · 31/10/2019 15:43

Neither really. I could live without him if I had to, but I'd really rather not! But yes, I'm with him because I love him, enjoy spending time with him, and because life is better when he's around.

This Grin

JollyAndBright · 31/10/2019 15:44

A

MerryDeath · 31/10/2019 15:48

B but with caveats! it's nice that so many people say A though... gives me hope that it's possible!

MrsTargaryan · 31/10/2019 15:49

A

MerryDeath · 31/10/2019 15:49

a combination of @SluggishSnail and @morriseysquif's Cs are the ones

VanillaSmile · 31/10/2019 15:50

A

xdestarx · 31/10/2019 16:26

A but I could live without him, I just wouldn't want to!

UnicornsExist · 31/10/2019 20:54

E) I stayed with soon to XDH far longer than I should have done because of the kids and financial constraints. I eventually couldn't cope with the emotional abuse any longer and hated the bastard so much that I couldn't stay no matter how much I tried to make it work. I'm still finding my feet after escaping but I have hopes that one day soon I will remember how to feel happy again.

mindutopia · 31/10/2019 21:06

Definitely A. I mean I could live without him if I had no choice, but I certainly wouldn’t want to. Dh and I have been together 11 years now and we’ve been through a hell of a lot (a couple international moves, 2 years long distance, big career changes, family drama, a miscarriage, 2 dc). I love him more now than the day we got married.

But I sure wouldn’t want to be single either. I really couldn’t tolerate dating. Dh is fortunate I enjoy him so much, because I’m usually fairly miserly!

Knockthreetimes · 31/10/2019 21:11

A

morriseysquif · 31/10/2019 21:51

I loved my EX, but he didn't love me. I was bereft when he went to work abroad and broken hearted when he left me. I can't imagine feeling that way about anybody again and not sure I want to as it was scary and a draining.

cleanasawhistle · 31/10/2019 21:59

A

Boofybear1 · 01/11/2019 10:36

A

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